KatieB Posted May 20, 2003 Share Posted May 20, 2003 It's been a wild ride for us these last 9 months, and now we are riding at a steady pace and it makes me nervous ALOT. Just waiting for the "other shoe" wondering if it is ok to live life again, etc... You all know what I mean. My Cronic Worry Disease (CWD) sets in every few weeks so here goes... Life is GOOD. Dad is tolerating chemo for once. It is going well. He was gotten out of the house 2-3 times a week the other day walked the grocery store with me & mom WITHOUT the wheelchair, just holding steady to the buggy. He has been to soccer games and my birthday party just a few days ago. I walked him out to the car- held onto his arm to keep him steady- then my left foot went into a low spot on the lawn and I just fell over! He looked at me like I was retarded! "YOU'RE the one who needs help walking!" He laughed. I am hopeful and afraid at the same time. Began a new job recently, so my posts have been few and far-between, considering I have been living on this board for the last 8 months. That 's been a big change, almost like withdrawls... I don't get to see dad either like I use to, and that REALLY makes me nervous. Maybe because things are stable and resembling "normalcy" that I get afraid? Maybe it's because Dad is having his upcoming tests next week and for the FIRST time ever, I won't get to be by his side..... Who knows, I got nothing to complain about, I'm the luckiest girl in the world- Dad is ALIVE, I have my family, my son, Rick, and ALL OF YOU. Thanks for letting me ramble. Won't be back until late tonight. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kimblanchard Posted May 20, 2003 Share Posted May 20, 2003 Katie - There is definitely a lot of CWD going around. It's hard to live with cancer - harder I think for the care givers than for the warriors. We wait with baited breath for test results, we wait for treatments to be complete. We wait and we wait...and our lives revolve around treatments, tests and waiting. Someday...maybe this process will be called "cancering" instead of terminal. Maybe people will learn to "live with it" and not fight against it. Maybe someday people will be taught how to prevent it. But most of all Katie - My prayer is that people will learn to enjoy the journey of life instead of focusing on the "destination". Love and hugs, Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shelliemacs Posted May 20, 2003 Share Posted May 20, 2003 wow katie, i think all cancer caregivers share one brain. I feel the same way, all of the time. I hate waiting, and thats all we do. Now Were waiting for 6-8 more weeks to see if the brain rad, is going to work. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Connie B Posted May 20, 2003 Share Posted May 20, 2003 Hey Katie, You bring back memories to when I was the caregiver to my family members. GOD HELP US get through the rough spots and THANK GOD for all the good times in between?! So very Glad to hear things are going well for dad and for you and the family. How does it feel to be back to work? And WHEN IS YOUR 30TH B-DAY??? This week RIGHT????? Holy Crap, your younger then MY daughter!! I remember the BIG 30 though. I was in bed at 9:30 that night! No I wasn't tipping a few earlier that day either!! To be 30 AGAIN!!! Warm and Gentle Hugs, Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
KatieB Posted May 20, 2003 Author Share Posted May 20, 2003 Sunday is the big day (30), but I've sure felt ALOT older these past months dealing with all of this. It's odd, but working 8-10 hours a day in a busy office (although exhausting) takes me completely away from the "worries" of my life. I'm tired, in bed earlier than usual, but that's ok. Hoping I won't be bouncing off the walls next Tues when I have to wait to "hear" about dad's tests instead of being there right next to him. THanks for replying guys! Hugs to ALL Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
mittlers Posted May 21, 2003 Share Posted May 21, 2003 Katie, Happy Birthday!! (a few days early). I know what you mean by the wild ride. Although Mom is doing fairly well right now she also has tests in two weeks. It is good that you are now working as it will help keep your mind busy but sometimes I find it hard to go to work knowing that I really should be spending more time with my Mom. I hope and pray that your Dads tests are good news. Please keep us updated and get some rest for your big day!! Hugs!! Susan M. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kelleyu Posted May 21, 2003 Share Posted May 21, 2003 katie: Just wanted to let you know how much your postings inspire me as my dad is a newly diagnosed SCLC patient. I feel a million different emotions a day and get scared when things seem normal too. It helps to know we are all in this together. Keep posting and glad you like your job. Here are to good results for your dad and mine. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Laurie Posted May 22, 2003 Share Posted May 22, 2003 Katie, Happy Birthday!!! Glad you like your new job and keep your CWD under control!! As for me?? I'm organizing my closets!! LOL!! Blessings to you and Dad! Laurie Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Deanna M. Posted May 22, 2003 Share Posted May 22, 2003 Katie, Good luck with the new job!!!! I am praying for your Dad still and of course for all our loved ones here. Sounds like your Dad is doing great. My mom is doing really well also. You can't help but worry though, that's part of my job description!!! Happy 30th birthday!!!! I turned 33 in February. Seems the older I am getting the faster the time goes. I haven't had much time here lately either, enjoying the good weather we've been having being outside with daughter. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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