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Mom just diagnosed with sclc


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My mother found out today that she has sclc. Finally after two biopsies. This waiting has been terrible. She will be going to see an Oncologist on Monday. The Pulmonologist said she will have radiation and Chemotherapy. He did not say if it was extensive or not. I'm not quite sure what to say to her. She has been coughing terribly for about 3 months now. At first they thought it was pneumonia. But, the chest x ray showed a tumor. My dad rushed her to the hospital last weekend because she was in so much pain and short of breath. I feel like this is happening so quickly. She can hardly do anything already. She is on a Nebulizer which seems to help the coughing somewhat. I don't want to be annoying to her. I try to help her as much as I can but I don't know what to do. I can do all the physical stuff like cooking, cleaning, getting her ice water and so on. But, emotionally I dont know what to do for her. I'm trying to stay positive but, its kind of hard. Especially since she is so sick right now. She is only 44 years old. Ive been reading the posts here ever since they suspected it could be lung cancer and is is very comforting. Just felt like i needed to vent tonight! Thanks for listening! :)

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Welcome to the best, most caring support group for lung cancer. I am so very sorry about your Mother, she is so young.

I think the best support for your Mother is to just be yourself. Let her know how much you love her and try to keep life as normal as possible.

For caregivers, this is very hard sometimes. But I don't think it is good to be doom and gloom around our loved ones.

I try to get my husband to laugh as much as possible. Sometimes I have to really strange things, just kidding, but every minute he is laughing is one less minute he is sad.

Take care of yourself and again, welcome.

Ginny

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Welcome. I am sorry to hear about your mother's diagnosis. Just try to support her and be there. When she starts treatment you can go with her and support her. It takes awhile to get chemo and it's nice to have someone there. Keep us posted on how she's doing.

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I am so sorry we had to meet this way, but I am glad you found us. You don't say how old you are, but you must be young and this must be hard for you as well as your dear mother who must be so grateful to have your support. Besides the support you will find on this site, you will find answers to many questions AND you will find out information that can lead you to the kinds of questions that you can ask or have your mother ask her medical team. I am also in my forties, and if you or your mom ever need to talk, just PM me. I will do all I can to help.

Let us all know how we can help.

Elaine

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Hi Jessnick and a great big WELCOME to you! :P You have definitely come to the right place. Everyone here will give you support, advice, answer your questions if they can, pray for you and your mom, and love you unconditionally. Also, we've got some really funny people on here that keep us all laughing which helps to keep a good attitude.

I'm so sorry that your mom has this unwelcome disease. I've discovered that when you just don't know how to help a person emotionally, the best thing to do is just BE THERE. Your presence alone is comforting and helpful without even saying a word.

God bless you and again, WELCOME!

Peggy

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Hi Jessnick!

My husband was in hospital for almost two and one-half months and is really doing great now! So hang in there, take a pad a paper with you for questions and notes, and make sure you and doctors schedule time to talk. You will find lots of answers and support here.

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Hi Jessnick,

Right now, maybe the best thing you can do to help your mom is to relieve her from some of the things she doesn't have the energy for. You are at the beginning of the battle, you have a great start to be a supportive person. Everything else, the emotional and physical support you can offer, will come in time, and the wonderful people here can help you figure it out. Step at a time, and try not to get overwhelmed. This is so much to deal with right now. Do you have siblings that you can share this with? A Dad? Keep posting and we can help you.

Jane

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Welcome! You have come to the right place for info and support. You ARE helping your mom by doing those things that need to be done routinely. Those things don't stop when one has cancer. I found during my wife's treatment that I had to take care of her, do all the things I normally do, and do all the things she normally would do. Of course, some things that were not urgent or serious got to wait. Take care and let us know how things are going for you and your mom. Don

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Welcome! So very sorry your Mom is so ill. I know you must be very frightened right now but don't panic. After treatment your Mom will feel much better and being so young she has a good chance of beating this thing. Keep taking deep breaths, (Snowflake's instructions for care-givers, and it really works.) and try to slow down a bit. Things may not be as dark as they seem.

Love and Prayers on their way to you and your Mom,

Paddy

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Hi,

I don't know how you are, but I was your Mom's age when I was first diagnosed with Lung Cancer. Please don't discount what a tremendous help doing all the physical things like cooking, cleaning, bringing ice water, etc. really is.

As far as the emotional support goes....tell her that you love her. Talk to her of the same things you've always talked of with her. I guess we're all different, but one of the things that hurt me the most was when two of my kids stopped talking to me about their futures....as if to imply that I wouldn't be interested in something that I wasn't likely to see. (My youngest two were 16 years old and 18 years old when I was first diagnosed.).

And don't forget to take care of yourself while you're helping to care for your Mom. You won't be any good to anyone if you let yourself become too run down.

Hope your Mom is feeling better very soon.

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Welcome to the family. I am sorry you have to be here but glad you found us. I am also in my 40's and have been fighting this beast for almost a year. Good news is I AM STILL HERE TO FIGHT IT!! Please do not pay attention to the statistics. Be sure your Mom's medical team is willing to be aggresive (if that is what she wants) and she has a good chance of fighting this.

We are all here for each other so please, don't be a stranger and invite your Mom to visit if she like also.

You are in my prayers,

God Bless,

MO

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Guest Phyllis

It sounds like you are doing all the right things. Just stay positive and don't over-react to things around her. It is better to vent on this forum where we have all been there done that. She will be freaking out on her own. I don't have sclc, but the others say that it responds really quickly to chemo.

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my mom was 61 when she was dx'd so I am obvioulsy a little older than you but I am sure we all love our moms the same was. I am in my early 30's and I had mom 6 months from dx to her passing. I took over, like you, doing all the physical labor and took her to her dr.'s and made shure she ate and took her meds.

but I still stayed the same with her too. I went to her with my problems, I asked her opinion on the same things. I still went to her with the fights I had with my husband I still went clothes shopping with her ( I just stuck her in a wheelchair so we could cover more ground) I still had my mom so the only things that changed were that we appreciated the time more and didn't take things for granted anymore.

your mom has good chances of beating this monster for a long long time with where treatments are today. So cry and let it out, then re-group and saddle up the horses around your family and fight fight fight.

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Jessnick,

Welcome.

I think it's marvelous that you're doing all the things for your mother to save her energy. You must love her a great deal.

You're doing the right things, helping her out by taking care of things so she doesn't have to. Tell her how you feel about her, and frequently.

Cancer is part of your life, but don't let it be the focus of your time together. It's great that you can be with her during chemo and all, it's easy to feel lost in the treatments and procedures when you're all by yourself. Best way to cheer her up is to distract her mind from this wretched disease, talk about books, play card games, watch movies, or just be together.

I was diagnosed at age 43, and that's one thing your mother has going for her, is she is still young and strong, and better able to deal with the treatments, at least that's what the doctors told me.

Keep us posted on what's going on.

Your mom is lucky to have a daughter like you.

Prayers, always,

XOXOXOX

MaryAnn

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Welcome, Jessnick...you've come to the best place to ask questions, get support, vent frustrations, etc. etc.

I was just diagnosed in April with SCLC, and I'm 45 yrs. old. The shortness of breath was what finally got me to the Doctor's (scared the heck out of me), and the diagnosis was made fairly quickly after the Chest X-Ray looked funky.

I can tell you that once she starts her chemo (and hopefully that will be real soon), the SOB should improve dramatically (that's usually the case). With me, it was like a miracle. Also, being so short of breath is a very scary thing, and I'm sure it's affecting your mom's state of mind. Once that is resolved, she'll feel much calmer, I'm sure.

You sound awesome, I'm sure your mom realizes how blessed she is to have you. My kids are all so positive and understanding...once I explained the diagnosis, treatments and possible outcomes to them, they were great. I believe MY state of mind affects how they will deal with this journey we've been detoured on.

Try to be receptive of your mom's moods and act accordingly. Of course, this is a very stressful time with so many unanswered questions, so many fears of the known and unknown. You seem to be handling all the physical things like a pro....that's wonderful! The emotional support can be a bit harder...you just have to give your mom time to come to terms with her diagnosis, and go with the flow. Be positive and upbeat, but don't ever forget that a good cry (I mean a gooooood cry, at least 1/2 a kleenex box worth) can be worth it's weight in gold. It's natural to cry...whether with your mom or alone...and it's cleansing.

Wow, do I know how to ramble, or what?...lol......sorry

Keep us posted....keep on keepin' on......and give your mom my best...I know what she's going through, and it's great that we both have wonderful children like you to help us now that we need you most.

Hope to see you soon......Mary :)

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Welcome Jessnick,

I can only tell you I felt the same way with my Brother but what he needed was for me to be myself and just be there for him as I know you are for your Mother. I didnt know what to say, how to say it etc but we are so close when I saw him I just hugged and kissed him and told him how much I loved him. I know you want to take away the cancer as did I but we know that is something we can not do so just show her your love and support. Be strong around her and when you need to cry, which I did often I went to my bedroom and just bawled! I felt better afterwards and was able to be supportive once again to my Brother and family. Yes, your Mom is young as is my Brother and I felt it was so unfair but lets face it CANCER is not fair to anyone at any age!! I know that you have found the right place to come to for support and answers. You can also help others which makes you feel good. We are a family here and I welcome you to it and we will always be here for you.

God Bless You all,

Jane

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