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Mr. Johnson had been retired for a year when his wife of 50 years suggested they take a cruise: "We could go somewhere for a week, and make wild love like we did when we were young!" He thought it over and agreed.

He put on his hat and went down to the pharmacy, where he bought a bottle of seasick pills and a box of condoms.

Upon returning home, his wife said, "I've been thinking. There is no reason we can't go for a month." So Mr. Johnson went back to the pharmacy and asked for 12 bottles of seasick pills and a box of condoms.

When he returned, his wife said, "You know, since the children are on their own, what's stopping us from cruising the world?"

So back to the pharmacy he went, and brought 297 bottles of seasick pills and the same amount of condoms up to the counter. The pharmacist finally had to ask.

"You know, Mr. Johnson, you have been doing business with me for over

30 years.

I certainly don't mean to pry, but if it makes you that sick, why the hell do you do it?"

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