Elaine Posted June 28, 2004 Share Posted June 28, 2004 Republican National Convention Schedule New York, NY 6:00 PM Opening Prayer, led by the Rev. Jerry Falwell 6:30 PM Pledge of Allegiance 6:35 PM Burning of Bill of Rights (excluding 2nd amendment) 6:45 PM Salute to the Coalition of the Willing 6:46 PM Seminar #1: Getting your kid a military deferment 7:30 PM First Presidential Beer Bong 7:35 PM Serve Freedom Fries 7:40 PM EPA Address #1: Mercury, it's what's for dinner 8:00 PM Vote on which country to invade next 8:10 PM Call EMTs to revive Rush Limbaugh 8:15 PM John Ashcroft Lecture: The Homos are after your children 8:30 PM Roundtable discussion on reproductive rights (MEN only) 8:50 PM Seminar #2: Corporations: the government of the future 9:00 PM Condi Rice sings "I Can't Help Lovin' Dat Man" 9:05 PM Second Presidential Beer Bong 9:10 PM EPA Address #2 Trees: the real cause of forest fires 9:30 PM Break for secret meetings 10:00 PM Second prayer, led by Cal Thomas 10:15 PM Lecture by Carl Rove: Doublespeak made easy 10:30 PM Rumsfeld demonstration: How to squint and talk macho 10:35 PM Bush demonstration of trademark deer-in-headlights stare 10:40 PM John Ashcroft demonstrates new mandatory Kevlar chastity belt 10:45 PM Clarence Thomas reads list of black republicans 10:46 PM Third Presidential Beer Bong 10:50 PM Seminar #3: Education: a drain on our nation's economy 11:10 PM Hilary Clinton Pinata 11:20 PM Second John Ashcroft Lecture: Evolutionists: the dangerous new cult 11:30 PM Call EMTs to revive Rush Limbaugh again 11:35 PM Blame Clinton 11:40 PM Laura serves milk and cookies 11:50 PM Closing Prayer, led by Jesus Himself 12:00 AM Nomination of George W. Bush as Holy Supreme Planetary Overlord Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest bean_si (Not Active) Posted June 29, 2004 Share Posted June 29, 2004 Republican National Convention ScheduleNew York, NY 6:35 PM Burning of Bill of Rights (excluding 2nd amendment) and I think they already did that. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
teresag Posted June 29, 2004 Share Posted June 29, 2004 10:45 PM Clarence Thomas reads list of black republicans They think that will take a full minute? Funny. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Larry Posted June 29, 2004 Share Posted June 29, 2004 Darn Elaine from this old conservative that was funny but David's Clinton Joke's were funnier......Ha Ha Ha Ha.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Elaine Posted June 29, 2004 Author Share Posted June 29, 2004 Larry LOL--I was wondering what you would say! elaine Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Larry Posted June 29, 2004 Share Posted June 29, 2004 June 15, 2004 Kerry to Expand Middle Class by Taxing Wealthy (2004-06-15) -- Democrat presidential hopeful John Forbes Kerry, who is also a U.S. Senator, today laid out his blueprint for increasing the size of the middle class by boosting taxes on the wealthy. In a speech to union members in New Jersey, Mr. Kerry answered critics who claim he has offered no coherent vision for America, and he slammed President Bush for "squeezing the middle class." "I believe in building up our great middle class--expanding it," said Mr. Kerry. "Now, to increase the size of the middle class you can do one of two things--either help poor people escape from poverty and dependency on government programs, or take some money away from rich people so that they become middle class. Now, which one of those sounds easier to you? It's a no brainer." Mr. Kerry said that the Bush administration "doesn't want you to be middle class. They want you to be like their rich cronies from Halliburton. But they don't tell you the dirty little secret...if you become wealthy, most of your money will go to pay taxes. Where's the compassion in their conservatism?" by Scott Ott | Donate | TrackBack (5) | Comments (142) | More Satire | Printer-Friendly Email this entry to: Your email address: Message (optional): Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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