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actual personals from Jewish newspapers


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Courtesy of beliefnet:

Divorced Jewish man seeks partner to attend shul with, light Shabbos candles, celebrate holidays, build Sukkah together, attend brisses and Bar Mitzvahs. Religion not important.

Israeli professor, 41, with 18 years of teaching in my behind. Looking for American-born woman who speaks English very good.

I am a sensitive Jewish prince to whom you can open your heart to share your innermost thoughts and deepest secrets. Confide in me. I'll understand your insecurities. No fatties, please.

Jewish male, 34. Very successful, smart, independent, self-made. Looking for girl whose father will hire me.

Single Jewish woman, 29, into disco, mountain climbing, skiing, track and field. Has slight limp.


Sing with me now: "Going to Kansas City, Kansas City here I come."

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Sing with me now: "Going to Kansas City, Kansas City here I come."

Now, since you admitted in an earlier post that you are going to a family reunion, the very next line of that chorus makes me shudder....LOL

As your temporary "hiring" agent, no one from that pool is acceptable... :roll:

"They got some crazy little women there and I'm a-gonna get me one..."

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