Jump to content

whats happening with me. (updated 2:15 pm)


shelliemacs

Recommended Posts

well. life sucks.

I guess i should be leaving the board and finding a breast cancer board now but I feel like i am family to you all and i am running out of blood family members so i keep coming here. i know now that the two people in my life with lung cancer are gone and my sister has breast cancer so i really don't belong now so if the powers that be want me to not write about this then thats ok, i understand.

my sister had her bone scan on tuesday. not sure if her cancer is there yet or not. not even sure if it is in her lymph nodes yet because surgery isn't for two weeks. I got her into a breast cancer oncologist in our area but I have Johns Hopkins in Baltimore as a backup that are willing to see her as well.

I am terrified to say the least as she is too. I keep thinking she has 6 months just like mom and dad did. they both only lasted 6 months with the LC.

she has two kids 10 and 14 and they are scared too. they saw both their grandparents die in the last 11 months from cancer and they think mom is dying now. they don't know one cancer from another so its hard for them.

I also have a biopsy scheduled for 7/15 due to two spots found on a test they made me take after my sisters dx. great huh.

so like my opening sentenance, life sucks.

i don't pray now. i just hope that the cancer is not in her bones or her lymph nodes.

BONE SCAN IS CLEAR. next is lymph node biopsy in two weeks. first oncologist appointment is this friday 7/9 at 1 pm. please let the nodes be clear too.!!!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Dear Shelly,

I am quite certain that no one wants you to leave this board. We are a family here and if you left, we would be worrying about you and your family, just like we would anyone else. So, put that idea out of your mind. I imagine there are many message boards out there for breast cancer survivors and their caregivers that would provide a lot of valuable information to you and your sister, but don't forget to come here for the emotional support that you need and that all of us want to give you.

Hang in there and please try to remain positive, although I know how hard that can be. And as for the prayers, I know how it feels to feel betrayed and alone, please know that you are not. But while you can not pray, there are plenty being said for you and your sister right now by all of us.

Denise

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Daer Shelly,

I have looking for a post from you. You have been missed. A breast cancer site may help you more on the information part of things but we are your family and I encourage you to be here often where you know people and they you. You have come to know this board as a loving caring family and dont you forget that we ARE a part of your extended family! As I told you earlier my Sister age 39 had breast cancer last year and id doing wonderful now and she was a stage 2b. Yes, she still worries but she is living a wonderfully active life again. BC is not lc so do not expect the same. You may not be able to pray but I sure can and am for both of you always.

God Bless You,

Jane

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I don't want you to "leave" us, Shelly. Go to the breast cancer boards for info specific to Breast Cancer, and then come back here when you need folks to tell you we love you. Because we do.

I'm hoping the cancer hasn't gone into your sister's lymph nodes and bones, too, or any other place for that matter.

And I want you to know that not all breast lumps are malignant. And even if they are not benign, sometimes they are considered "pre-malignant", which means a much better prognosis. (I had bilateral mastectomies for pre-malignant tumors and severe fibrocystic breast disease 13 years ago, two months after losing my Mother to Lung Cancer.)

You can do this, Shelly. You can be there for your sister, you can make it through your biopsy procedures, and you can carve out a good life for yourself and your loved ones no matter what the biopsies and scans show.

One former Military Wife to another....I KNOW how strong you are...but it's more than okay to ask for help along the way. It's what we DO for each other.

Love,

Fay A.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Shelly,

Please don't leave us now. I know sometimes praying is hard but let us do it for you. Just take one day at a time and try not to project too far ahead - it is far more manageable that way. I had lung cancer surgery in Feb. 2000 and Dec. 2000 a breast biopsy. Fortunately it was benign but I don't have to tell you the fear I was feeling. If you are taking anti-depressants and they aren't working maybe your doctor could try a different one.

Just take care of yourself and please keep in touch.

Love and hugs,

Nancy

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I'm with Fay -- you need to stay here for support and we want you here. All cancers are not alike, so it would be good if you also find a breast cancer site and learn about that and ask your info questions there. You tend to treat the breast cancer with your lung cancer experience and they are not the same. Good luck. I will be looking for you to continue posting and let us know how you and your sister are doing. Don

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Shelly,

Of course don't leave. We are your family. Many of your family have asked you to get some counseling so you can continue to be the heart of this extended family and your at home family. I am not sure what stops you from doing that, but pls reconsider, if not for yourself, then for both of your familes. The emotional toll the roller coaster you have been on can't be healthy for you.

We love you and pray that your sister and you have full lifetimes to share.

elaine

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Shelly,

You are not allowed to leave us, so get that thought out of your head!

I so hope it is not in her lymph nodes or bones. When is the surgery to know? WHen will you get the bone scan results? Keep us posted! We love you!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Shelly,

This is manageable--I know you've been hit with a lot, but breast cancer is way different.....hopefully, the bone scans will be clean and it will be curative treatment.

Keep those PM's coming too--we want to know how you and your sister make out......

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Shelly,

Please don't leave.

As for your sister's children, talk your sister into going to a cancer counselor with the kids. Believe it or not, they know more than anyone thinks they do. My son was 10 when I was diagnosed - I planned my trip to MD Anderson around his 11th birthday! A cancer counselor would be able to answer EVERYONE'S questions from "Is my Mom going to die?" to "Am I going to catch cancer, too?"...

Hang in there, Shelly. We're all here for you, you ARE family.

xxoo,

Becky

PS Is it possible to have Aunt Shelly/Uncle X time with the kids so that Mom & Dad can have some "thought" time together?

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Shelly,

As the others have already said, you are a very important part of our family and if you left this site, we would all worry like mother hens. Keep us posted and if we can help you get through this, we will.

We love you girl and we care about you and your sister. We know what you have been through so far and if you think for one second we would abandon you or let you leave without a fight, you are sadly mistaken.

So kid, stick around, keep us informed and let us know what you need.

Many warm hugs and prayers are here just for you.

Love,

Shirleyb

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Shelly,

I second the suggestion to get Dr. Susan Love's Breast Book. My surgeon loaned it to me when I was diagnosed and I read it cover to cover. Lots of plain talk, and good information. I felt much, much better when I knew more....do it! You and your sister both need to read it.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Shelly,

You are not allowed to leave. Only Ry and Katie and Connie have the authority to kick people outta here. You are family until formally??? invitied to leave.

And besides, I need your avatars to give me my daily giggle.

Hang tough sweetie, it has been a bumpy year.

Love,

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Please stay :!: We need you too. Breast cancer is an ugly disease as all cancer is but it is NOT lung cancer :!: I had a lady in my care who was a 30 year surviver of breast cancer. I'm not sure of the stage but she had had both breasts removed and was still alive and determined to stay that way. :)

As for not being able to pray I know how it feels to think that your faith has betrayed you. For a while Johnny was so afraid of his faith that I had to carry it for him. The time came when he took it back and it was stronger than ever. I lost my faith and felt betrayed by it. I had no one to carry it for me but God saw and understood. He carried it for me and now dispite all of my loss and heartache God is a very important part of my life. Please let us carry your faith for you until you are ready to take it up again yourself. Isn't that what family is for? We are your family and we love you. Lillian

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Shelly-

You stay with this board!!! What would I do without your smileys to make me laugh when Im down and out??? Were all here for ya. Lung cancer, breast cancer, parent, sister, who cares?? Your part of our family and we care about whatever is effecting you. We want to know if your parakeet gets a cold. Stop right there and realize what you mean to everyone here. We love you and well always be here...no matter what!

Jamie

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Restore formatting

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

By using this site, you agree to our Terms of Use. We have placed cookies on your device to help make this website better. You can adjust your cookie settings, otherwise we'll assume you're okay to continue.