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Duke of Earl - Chapter 69 - Bad News Update


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Earl came home by ambulance this afternoon. The hospice nurse met us at the house. The doctors feel that there are hundreds of brain tumors and that the liver tumors are causing the extreme fatigue and weakness.

He is in a hospital bed in our family room with a view of the deck and trees and when not snoozing he is watching the food network, go figure.

The hospital bed was broken, side wouldn't stay up. The nurse and I could not get him out the bed for it to be fixed, so we had to call the police for 'lift assist.' Police said they would do it any time.

Hospice said that we really need some type of help here at the house or Earl should go to a hospice facility. Well that's not happening. This is his home and he will stay here. So I am calling all over the place to get an LPN or certified caregiver or something.

Hospice sends a health aide mon to fri to bath him etc. but the nurse will not be back until tues. Seems like a long time. I also need to find where I can buy hospital gowns or something similar because I think anything on his back that wrinkles up would be uncomfortable.

So we embark on another leg of this journey. I pray that he is peaceful and comfortable.

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Oh, Ginny, Ginny. This breaks my heart. It also just sounds so much like a repeat of my dad - the hospital bed, the gown, the lift. If it hadn't been for that darned machine, my dad could have been at home, too, just like you are so thoughtfully doing for your beloved Earl. You are doing the right thing. You are doing what HE wants. You are the best, most loving wife. May God reward you for your unselfish and loving heart.

I'm so sad. :cry::cry:



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Dear Ginny,

I am also so sad. I know I just dont have any words to make things better and that hurts in itself. I am glad Earl is home and Tuesday does seem a long time away. When we finally got hospice involved in my Brothers care which was only a day before he passed they told us they were on call 24/7. What you need to do is tell them in no uncertain terms that you need them DAILY. This is what we told them. They said if we felt that was what was needed they would be. The reason we felt this was his decline was so rapid. I do think you can have someone there daily and not have to wait on any help till Tuesday. Call them.

My hearts breaks for both of you. The love you share has always been so evident in your posts. You are truely blessed to have one another. I am praying for Earl's comfort and your strength. Please give Earl a kiss for me.

God Bless you Both,


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Ginny -

Sounds like some tough work on your hands - you're a good wife. I hope you can find the help you need at the house. It would be nice if he can stay there - of course it would be nicer if you could get him looking out the window rather than watching the Food Network!

Many, many, many hugs for both of you....

And prayers of course,


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I am at a loss for words and have nothing to offer to give you a smile... Stick to your guns on keeping him home and comfortable and I wish you luck on finding help (I believe Kelly Services has a 'visiting nurse' kinda thing for caregivers to use, not sure on cost). I am so sorry it has come down to this for you two.

You both have my love,


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I am so glad you were able to get Earl back home. I also know you will move heaven and earth to make Earl as happy as he can be right now.

I am so sad and so so sorry that it has come to this. My heart is breaking for you. I know only too well what it is like to watch the one you love, hurting and not being able to do the things he would like to do. Even the simple pleasures in life take on a whole new meaning.

I wish I could make things better for you both. It is time to call in the troops and any favors anyone "owes" either of you. Try to get whatever help you can in all aspects of your life right now so that you can be there with Earl.

You are both in my prayers. My prayers are for time, for comfort, for grace, and for dignity for both of you.

All my love,


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I am so sorry to read your updated chapter. It's wonderful you are able to have him at home. Your hospice should have a social worker or someone to help with setting up in home help, but if not check for people that do private duty in the paper or call a home health agency. Hiring caregivers is what I do so if you need some help with that let me know. Also, your hospice has a nurse on call 24 hours so call whenever you need her.

There should be a hospital supply store near you for gowns, if not there are lots on the net you can order from. Wish I could do something Ginny...just know we're all here for you and circling around you.


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Oh Ginny............my heart is breaking for you right now. :cry: I hate to hear this news. I really wish that I was closer to you. I would come and help you out all that I could. I hope that you are able to find a kind and loving person to help you with Earl at this time. When my family found ourselves in need of some in home help, we stumbled across a wonderful nurse's aide. She was GREAT. I pray that you will find someone just like her.

I am praying for both you and Earl!!

Love, hugs and prayers!


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Dear Ginny~~

I'm glad the Duke is home with you, but otherwise I'm just terribly sad for both of you. If love alone had the power to cure....well, we know how different things would be, don't we?

Holding you both gently in my thoughts and prayers....wishing there was something more tangible to do.

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So sorry for both of you.

I am thinking back to last October when it was time for

Mike to be in the same situation.

Hospital bed are good, but I used a special sheep skin

over the sheets to prevent bed sores, they are medical

and I used the one I had for myself, that did the trick,

used short hospital gowns (we cut them) and special boxer shorts,

(velcro to close)easier to handle and change, padded the side of

the bed with covered foam (removable) and put soft music 24/7 on,

TV was there at the start, but just the image as the time went on.

Had already made all the contacts for help and Mike knew everybody

that would take care of him, got his chimes, and I could say it

was more for him a good time than a bad time as he was concious

till the last minute and all the people were in a good mood, except

the doctors and we got rid of them very fast.

If you are able to get some Lemon-Glyceryn Swabsticks they help

so much for the mouth.

Sorry about all the details, but I am sure you know what is the best

so I will just wish you strength and all the help you can get.

Love to you both


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