stand4hope Posted July 31, 2004 Share Posted July 31, 2004 I'm sitting at this computer this morning filled with grief and sadness. We have lost three lovely members of this family in the last two days and it's almost more than I can bear. Is this healthy? Should I/we really be here? Obviously, I know the "up" side of being a member of this family - you're all there for me, and I'm there for you. We support each other, encourage each other, vent, rant, joke, share, cry, become friends, and fall in love. But then wham - down comes that hammer on one of our loved ones, and like this week, the hammer doesn't come back up. I've told this before, but shortly after I joined, I almost quit when Peg's beloved Bill died. Then right after that, Curtis lost Becky whom I didn't even know, and everyone was torn apart. After Bill died, I wrote to Ry about how I was feeling and she told me she understood how I felt but that she couldn't NOT come here. I feel that as well, but at the same time I can't help but ask myself if this good. Right now, it doesn't feel good and it doesn't feel right. Is it just emotion overload? It's been bad enough losing my mom, my Nana, and my dad in the last five years. They were my last links to my heritage, and now I'm facing that potential with my husband as well. This story is the same for many, many of you. Are we doing the right thing being here for each other? How can I stay here and bear this heartache? I am really hurting this morning, my friends - I'm hurting real bad, and I know a lot of you are as well. My husband is out cutting the grass right now - the picture of health. I look out the window and tears roll off my cheeks because of what has happened here this week. I'm rambling. I don't know where this is going? I don't know what my point is. I don't know what I'm feeling. Just wondering if I should stick around. I've got to go the bank - it closes in 15 minutes. Life goes on. Love to all, Peggy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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