MSWKitty Posted August 17, 2004 Share Posted August 17, 2004 well, i'm pretty spaced out right now. i think i'm slightly in shock. dad went into the hospital on friday for a number of tests. he was having pain in his upper right abdomen and was also acting very confused. to make a long story short. we found out today from the doctor that he has a tumor in his brain. he will get radiosurgery (something like that) on thursday. the doctor actually spoke with my mom, and she called me and my husband to relay the information, so she was a little foggy herself (i know she's having a hard time with this as well). she said the doctor told her to seriously think about whether or not we want to continue on with further treatments, after thursday, or just do our best to make sure my dad is comfortable. in other words-- HOSPICE! i don't know what to think or do. my dad is very lucid now that he's been in the hospital and receiving care. he still has some strength, and has always responded well to physical therapy. i just don't know what to make of this doctor suggesting that it might be time to let him go. i need some words of wisdom folks! i've always found them here, so write away! thanks so much-- i truly appreciate your thoughts and prayers. kitty Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kimblanchard Posted August 17, 2004 Share Posted August 17, 2004 I have no advice for your particular circumstance, but hope that all turns out well. I think it is primarily up to the patient to decide how much to fight. As long as he is feeling strong enough to fight, I would say go for it. Praying for y'all, Curtis Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Don Wood Posted August 18, 2004 Share Posted August 18, 2004 If your dad wants to fight on and the doc is not giving any options, it might be time to talk with another doc for a second opinion. I encourage that. Don Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
stand4hope Posted August 18, 2004 Share Posted August 18, 2004 Hi Kitty. It sounds like you have been having a really tough time. I read your profile and it looks like your dad has been up and down quite a bit, hasn't he? Of course, the decision to fight or not to fight is up to your dad, and input from your mom, you, and the rest of the family. You don't mention your dad's age. Does he have general good health otherwise? This has got to be heartbreaking and overwhelming for you. The best thing to do, but the hardest thing, is to just get it out in the open with your dad and let him talk about what he wants to do. There's also no reason why you can't give him your opinion as long as he knows the final decision is up to him and you will accept it. God bless you, Kitty, and hang in there kiddo! Love, Peggy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Andrea Posted August 18, 2004 Share Posted August 18, 2004 Kitty I second the idea for a second opinion. I am so sorr ythat you are going through this LA has a lot of fine doctors, it can't hurt to go to someone else just to see. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MSWKitty Posted August 18, 2004 Author Share Posted August 18, 2004 Thanks for the replys everyone. Peggy, my dad is 71-years-old, and has generally been in good health his whole life. He did smoke for many years, and he's always been a slim guy, so the chemo and radiation have always done a number on him. He doesn't have a lot of room to lose weight, but he still loses 15 to 20 pounds when he goes into the hospital. And it's so hard to get anyone in the hospital to see him for physical therapy. By the time they do, he's back to square one-- where he's barely able to stand (which is about where he is right now- again!) . We will talk with my dad about what he wants to do. I'm so happy that my brother from the east coast is coming out today to be with him (and us) before and after the surgery. That's about all I can think of now. I'm so stressed. Not only am I going through this with dad but, my husband and I just bought a house, I'm waiting for a big job interview, and I'm having some health problems myself. Oye! I guess when it rains, it pours . Thanks again everyone. Love, Kitty Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Fay A. Posted August 18, 2004 Share Posted August 18, 2004 Dear Kitty, Hoping that the surgery goes well and that your Father recovers quickly. Look, I'm the patient, so I'm not the most objective person. But I have very real problems with Doctors who have the kind of conversation that this doc had with your Mother, because it sounds as if he did so without including your Father. It's a decision for your Dad to make. If I have misunderstood, and the Physician didn't instigate this discussion with your Mother out of the presence of your Father-the one whose life is being discussed-then I apologize. But if the Physician did have this conversation behind your Dad's back then I would be consulting with another Oncologist ASAP. Just my 12 cents on the subject. Hope he does well, Kitty. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
paddy Posted August 19, 2004 Share Posted August 19, 2004 I agree, I think that the decision must be made by your Dad. I think the doc should have consulted him with your Mom. Paddy Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Donna G Posted August 19, 2004 Share Posted August 19, 2004 Today is the day for that radiosurgery. We are all praying it went well and awaiting your update. Donna G Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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