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A letter from Robert


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My dearest Joni,

I am writing to tell you that I love you. I feel good today and am

pretty peaceful. I ache in my heart to be with you, just near you. I

am so grateful that god placed you and I on the same path. I know that

the portion of the path we are on now is not what either of of could

have foreseen, but I feel so desperately close to you, so much in love,

so grateful for your love. I looked at Alex leaning against you as we

sat on his bed last night and burned that image into soul. It's very

hard for me to look at it...sort of like looking into the sun. I love

you both with all my heart and soul.

I found this e-mail from Robert. He sent this to me from work one day, early in his illness while he was undergoing radiation and chemotherapy.

I wonder if it's too private to share but this note just seems like he just sent it. He was only 42 years old (barely) and I'm only 39. I don't want to be without him. I'm so lonely for him and his big ol' self! He was larger than life and his laughter filled our home.

Well, I'm off to get some sleep with a little help from Ambien.

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Thank you for sharing. I recently got an e-mail from Becky that she had sent to a friend about me dating again if the worst happened. She had sent it over a year ago, while still stable on Iressa and when we were so full of hope.

Basically, she told our friend she didn't want to talk to me about dating again, because she was so afraid I would promise her I wouldn't. She didn't want me guilty that I had broken the promise or unhappy because I hadn't.

I am coming to grips with the fact that she will continue to amaze me anew for the rest of my days. As will Robert's love for you and your son. I am so glad you got this vivid reminder of his love.


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I'm so sorry for your pain and your loss. I believe that you found that beautiful letter from your beloved husband again, now, as a sign from him that he is still with you. The words that he wrote sound like he is sending the same message to you from heaven. I hope that you get many more "signs" and wish you peace in the difficult times ahead.

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What a beautiful note. I, too, have found little notes from Dennis from timt to time and it breaks my heart to read them but at the same time it brings peace knowing and remembering how strong our love was, after 25 years. Those of us left behind are so unfortunate, as we have to struggle every day to deal with the loss. We can only pray that all of our loved ones are gathered in a beautiful place and are watching over all of us! I believe that!!!

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