Going to Rope a Deer !!!

[Larry]

>

>I had this idea that I was going to rope a deer, put it in a stall,

feed it

>up on corn for a couple of weeks, then kill it and eat it. The first

step

>in this adventure was getting a deer. I figured that since they

>congregated

>at my cattle feeder and do not seem to have much fear of me when we

are

>there (a bold one will sometimes come right up and sniff at the bags

of

>feed

>while I am in the back of the truck not 4 feet away) that it should

not be

>difficult to rope one, get up to it and toss a bag over its head (to

calm

>it

>down) then hog tie it and transport it home.

>I filled the cattle feeder then hid down at the end with my rope. The

>cattle, who had seen the roping thing before, stayed well back. They

were

>not having any of it. After about 20 minutes my deer showed up...3 of

>them.

> I picked out a likely looking one, stepped out from the end of the

>feeder,

>and threw my rope. The deer just stood there and stared at me. I

wrapped

>the rope around my waist and twisted the end so I would have a good

hold.

>The deer still just stood and stared at me, but you could tell it was

>mildly

>concerned about the whole rope situation. I took a step towards it.

It

>took a step away. I put a little tension on the rope and received an

>education.

>

>The first thing that I learned is that while a deer may just stand

there

>looking at you funny while you rope it, they are spurred to action

when you

>start pulling on that rope. That deer EXPLODED.

>

>The second thing I learned is that pound for pound, a deer is a LOT

>stronger

>than a cow or a colt. A cow or a colt in that weight range I could

fight

>down with a rope with some dignity. A deer, no chance. That thing

ran and

>bucked and twisted and pulled. There was no controlling it and

certainly

>no

>getting close to it. As it jerked me off my feet and started dragging

me

>across the ground, it occurred to me that having a deer on a rope was

not

>nearly as good an idea as I originally imagined. The only up side is

that

>they do not have as much stamina as many animals. A brief 10 minutes

>later,

>it was tired and not nearly as quick to jerk me off my feet and drag

me

>when

>I managed to get up. It took me a few minutes to realize this, since

I was

>mostly blinded by the blood flowing out of the big gash in my head.

>

>

>

>At that point I had lost my taste for corn fed venison. I just wanted

to

>get that devil creature off the end of that rope. I figured if I just

let

>it go with the rope hanging around its neck, it would likely die slow

and

>painfully somewhere. At the time, there was no love at all between me

and

>that deer. At that moment, I hated the thing and I would venture a

guess

>that the feeling was mutual. Despite the gash in my head and the

several

>large knots where I had cleverly arrested the deer's momentum by

bracing my

>head against various large rocks as it dragged me across the ground, I

>could

>still think clearly enough to recognize that there was a small chance

that

>I

>shared some tiny amount of responsibility for the situation we were

in, so

>I

>didn't want the deer to have to suffer a slow death. I managed to get

it

>lined up to back in between my truck and the feeder...a little trap I

had

>set beforehand. Kind of like a squeeze chute. I got it to back in

there

>and started moving up so I could get my rope back.

>

>Did you know that deer bite? They do! I never in a million years

would

>have thought that a deer would bite somebody so I was very surprised

when I

>reached up there to grab that rope and the deer grabbed hold of my

wrist.

>Now, when a deer bites you, it is not like being bit by a horse where

they

>just bite you and then let go. A deer bites you and shakes its head..

>almost like a pit bull. They bite HARD and it hurts. The proper

thing to

>do when a deer bites you is probably to freeze and draw back slowly.

I

>tried screaming and shaking instead. My method was ineffective. It

seems

>like the deer was biting and shaking for several minutes, but it was

likely

>only several seconds. I, being smarter than a deer (though you may be

>questioning that claim by now) tricked it. While I kept it busy

tearing

>the

>bejesus out of my right arm, I reached up with my left hand and pulled

that

>rope loose.

>

>That was when I got my final lesson in deer behavior for the day.

Deer

>will

>strike at you with their front feet. They rear right up on their back

feet

>and strike right about head and shoulder level, and their hooves are

>surprisingly sharp. I learned a long time ago that when an animal

like a

>horse strikes at you with their hooves and you can't get away easily,

the

>best thing to do is try to make a loud noise and make an aggressive

move

>towards the animal. This will usually cause them to back down a bit

so you

>can escape. This was not a horse. This was a deer, so obviously such

>trickery would not work. In the course of a millisecond I devised a

>different strategy. I screamed like woman and tried to turn and run.

The

>reason I had always been told NOT to try to turn and run from a horse

that

>paws at you is that the re is a good chance that it will hit you in

the

>back

>of the head. Deer may not be so different from horses after all,

besides

>being twice as strong and three times as evil, because the second I

turned

>to run, it hit me right in the back of the head and knocked me down.

>

>Now when a deer paws at you and knocks you down it does not

immediately

>leave. I suspect it does not recognize that the danger has passed.

What

>they do instead is paw your back and jump up and down on you while you

are

>laying there crying like a little girl and covering your head. I

finally

>managed to crawl under the truck and the deer went away.

>

>Now for the local legend. I was pretty beat up. My scalp was split

open,

>I

>had several large goose eggs, my wrist was bleeding pretty good and

felt

>broken (it turned out to be just badly bruised) and my back was

bleeding in

>a few places, though my insulated canvas jacket had protected me from

most

>of the worst of it. I drove to the nearest place, which was the

co-op. I

>got out of the truck, covered in blood and dust and looking like hell.

The

>guy who ran the place saw me through the window and came running out

>yelling

>"what happened"

>

>I have never seen any law in the state of Kansas that would prohibit

an

>individual from roping a deer. I suspect that this is an area that

they

>have overlooked entirely. Knowing, as I do, the lengths to which law

>enforcement personnel will go to exercise their power, I was concerned

that

>they may find a way to twist the existing laws to paint my actions as

>criminal. I swear....not wanting to admit that I had done something

>monumentally stupid played no part in my response. I told him "I was

>attacked by a deer." I did not mention that at the time I had a rope

on

>it.

> The evidence was all over my body. Deer prints on the back of my

jacket

>where it had stomped all over me and a large deer print on my face

where it

>had struck me there.

>

>I asked him to call somebody to come get me...I didn't think I could

make

>it

>home on my own. He did.

>

>Later that afternoon, a game warden showed up at my house and wanted

to

>know

>about the deer attack. Surprisingly, deer attacks are a rare thing

and

>wildlife and parks was interested in the event. I tried to describe

the

>attack as completely and accurately as I could...I was filling the

grain

>hopper and this deer came out of nowhere and just started kicking the

hell

>out of me and BIT me. It was obviously rabid or insane or something.

>EVERYBODY for miles around knows about the deer attack (the guy at the

>co-op

>has a big mouth). For several weeks people dragged their kids in the

house

>when they saw deer around and the local ranchers carried rifles when

they

>filled their feeders. I have told several people the story, but NEVER

>anybody around here. I have to see these people every day and as an

>outsider...a "city folk"...I have enough trouble fitting in without

them

>snickering behind my back and whispering "there is the dumb-*ss that

tried

>to rope the deer.