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charlielou

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Hi everyone!

I've just joined this community. My dad was dx with advanced SCLC in Jan2004 and was given approx 1 year. He has had 6 rounds of chemo (carboplatin & etopiside) which has appeared to have stopped the tumours growth and is not currently recieving any further treatment. I am struggling with this. It was easier when he was having chemo, it was like we were actually fighting this awful disease whereas now we are all just wating, waiting for it to rear its ugly head up somewhere else. I still find my dads diagnosis hard to take, I can't believe that they expect him to be gone so soon. He is so fit and well at the moment. He has just come back from Portugal after watching the football, he's off to Wimbledon next week to watch the tennis, he does diy, gardening etc. He's even going to come back to work after he comes back off holiday mid July!

He's even said he hasn't felt this good in about 2 years. He put weight on during his chemo (25 lbs) and he hasn't got/had any breathing difficulties.

I guess I just can't accept this :(

Charlie x

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Hi Charlie

I am a community member from London, my Dad was dx’d with ncslc in May, this community has already provided much support.

I understand only too well the absolute shock that comes after a dx like this and the disbelief. Take no notice of any doctors prognosis, they don’t know can’t know how much time your Dad has left. He is fit and well and this will make a big difference in the way his body accepts medical treatment and deals with the cancer.

The advice we got from my Dad’s doctor was that statistics will not predict the course of his cancer, he is not a statistic he is an individual. They also told my Dad not to live like a cancer patient. It sound like your Dad isn’t doing this and has a positive attitude. This is also something that will be a massive help.

I know what you mean about feeling better when you are fighting it. My Dad hasn’t started his chemotherapy yet and waiting for it to begin is really difficult. Have you thought about fighting the cancer with alternative methods while your Dad is not taking Chemotherapy, Such as supplements and nutrition, they are all worth while to boost the bodies immune system and help it fight the cancer and will make you feel that you are not just sitting back and letting it happen.

You and your family are in my prayers

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Thanks Sarah!

Your dad is 56? Mine is 54.

I have suggested alternative therapies but im afraid my dad is quite narrow minded and does't believe in them (I have managaed to get him to take a good broad sprectrum multi-vit and mineral supplement) he believes firmly in the wonders of modern medicine and "if any of that other rubbish worked the Doctors would be prescribing it" at least I can say the cancer hasn't changed his opinions,lol. :lol:

I guess another reason I am finding all this so hard is im an only child and I don't have any siblings to share (? not sure if thats the right term) this with. My mum has been very dependant on me and I guess the last six months are finally catching up with me. She is absolutely devastated. They have been together for 38 years, married for 35.

I feel terribly selfish saying im struggling with all they're going through! But if im going to be strong for them I need to vent it away from them if that makes sense?!?

Thanks again! Your Dad will be in my prayers,

Take care,

Charlie x

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Guest bean_si (Not Active)
I feel terribly selfish saying im struggling with all they're going through!

You are not selfish. You are human. Those who love the person who has cancer have as much pain - it's just coming at them from a different angle. Your dad sounds like a great guy who is LIVING his life. How wonderful that is for him.

Cat

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Hi Charlie

My Dad worked as a research chemist and was naturally skeptical about any alternative remedies however he is willing to try anything that could help him. It is not necessarily true that doctors only advocate chemo he was told specificaly to take some of these supplements. But on the other hand like your Dad he is very stubborn and there are certain suggestions which I make which he can be very dismissive about. I suppose our job is present with suggestions and leave the decisions to them.

I understand that it is difficult for you to share your feelings as you have no brothers or sisters and do not want to burden your parents, but I have found this board to be a good source of non judgemental support.

Take care

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Charlie, don't give up! Don't give up hope. Continue the fight with whatever you can. My wife was given 9 months and she is now 21 months out from diagnosis, and doing well at the moment. There are a lot of supportive folks here to lean on -- do so. Don

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