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adela

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Posts posted by adela

    April 10 wedding anniversary.

    in GRIEF

    Posted

    April 10 is our wedding anniversary. We met at the beach had a long distance realtionship. We got marrried he left his beloved Seattle and moved to California to be with me. We laughed, we disagreed, we agreed, we become a partnership and soulship that accomplished alot. He gave me a rose for every year of marriage so this year I get 7 roses.

    Today will be 30 days since he died. I miss him terribly. There are some that say to me you are young and can have another relationship. I don't want another relationship. I wanted to continue the one I have.

    Grieving is hard and wrenching at times.

    Today I will go outside and let the wind blow the sink off of me. That is what Ed would say to me when we stayed indoors too long. We have to get out and have the stink blown off of us.

    NED

    in NSCLC GROUP

    Posted

    That is fantastic!!!!!!!!!I hope you stay NED forever.

    I am from Albuquerque grew up around 8th and Mountain Road then moved to the west side.

    26 days Help me process

    in GRIEF

    Posted

    It has been 26 days since my husband died. Yesterday I got a call from the ex-wife asking when the WILL is going to be read. She was told by my sister-in-law that my husband provided for his two children.

    His 2 children are over 21.....one adult son lives 20 minutes away. He came at the minimum 30 to 60 minutes evey other week to visit his dying father. My husband so wanted to see his son, several times I mentioned to the son to come over and he said he didn't have time. He works and goes to school on Tuesday, Thursday and Saturday afternoons. When my husband knew he was dying and wanted to go back to Seattle, I offered to pay for a airline ticket for his daughter to visit him. She refused and said she couldn't because she had to pay her mortgage. With clarity I told her your father is dying and you will not be able to see him again alive.

    It was so hard for me to see him yearn so much to see his children.......the week before he died he would call out their names to come help him. I would comfort him as much as I could. Can the community help me process the anger I feel towards these adults. It is consuming me and I am not grieving for my husband. My therapist said anger is easier to grab hold of instead of grief. I want to process my anger and go to the grieving.

    Reality Stinks!

    in CAREGIVER RESOURCE CENTER

    Posted

    Shanna, you will be able to do this. You will be able to hold your Mother tell her you love her. You will be able to cry with your Mother.......and when the time comes you will be able to say Good Bye.

    The radiation could help her with pain. What about Hospice.....the nurses are good and they know what is needed to help with pain.

    Take care of yourself and you are doing everything possible for your mother.

    My prayers for you and your family.

    Very Scared

    in CAREGIVER RESOURCE CENTER

    Posted

    Shanna,

    Hospice would help alot. Hospice helped on pain meds for my husband and I was very happy about it. I was very scared and I read a book called Final Gifts....the book was a big help. Hospice will give you information that helps you a lot.

    Take care of yourself and you will be able to take care of your mother.

    Adela

    It's Hard

    in GRIEF

    Posted

    Yes Karen it is very hard. It has been about 2 weeks for me. Today I wanted to share something about work with my husband but he isn't here. It feels so empty. I know you and I are on a journey with the wonderful help of others here we will be help along the way.

    I am so sorry for your loss.

    Guilt

    in GRIEF

    Posted

    Even with the mask on he could have lasted until the next day. Pehaps the best thing to do is understand yourself and take care of yourself. Each of us goes thru grieving different.

    Take care and be kind to you!!!!!!

    WBR-memory/word issues?

    in NSCLC GROUP

    Posted

    My husband had WBR and he would kind of speak in a strange language. Like all x's....this would happen when he was under a lot of stress. It was quite distrubing to him and me. I would just wait until he got his wits about him and then it would be ok.

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