kimblanchard
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Posts posted by kimblanchard
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Shordy -
I'm so happy things worked out for you and your dad.
I'm a real sucker for happy endings!
Love and hugs,
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thanks
in SCLC GROUP
Sandy,
My deepest sympathy - Praying for comfort for you and your children.
Love and hugs,
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Shordy-
I can understand your frustration and your pain.
It's very possible that your father, feeling some regrets over past failures in his life, is trying to push you away from him.
I believe sometimes people facing the big "C" - are so intimidated by the disease, all they "see" is that they are going to be leaving. In an effort to make their leaving easier on the ones they love, they push them away...by thoughts, words or deeds.
He is probably very angry right now. It's a normal reaction - especially at the very beginning. He wants to CONTROL something - and since he can't control the disease...or possibly even the medical process, he will try to control you - his child. The one that he had "control" over years ago as he was responsible for your upbringing.
This is not to excuse his behavior...I don't think cancer warriors HAVE to be rude, cruel or angry. It's still a choice they make. But it is harder for them in the midst of the battle to make the right choice due to the illness, the drugs, etc.
But you also have a choice Shordy - You can choose to forgive or you can choose to remain hurt and angry.
Forgiveness is a gift we give ourselves. It's not about whose at fault. It isn't saying nothing happened. It says there has been a FAULT committed and I choose to forgive you for it. It's so that you can move on with your life and love. It's not tolerating bad behavior, it's forgiving it and moving on.
A time out is a good thing...take time to collect yourself and remember how much you love the man...in spite of his faults...in spite of his uncontrollable pain that he is feeling right now. He does need you and your support.
Hugs, hugs and more hugs.....Cancer is more than a physical thing...it's about learning who they are and who we are....You can become a better person through all this or a bitter person. The choice is yours Shordy. And I believe you are too loving, too kind and too intelligent to let this momentary problem destroy you.
Love and hugs,
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Thanks again everyone.
The clinical trial that they are talking about is Iressa. We need to get Bill feeling well enough to make a 2 hour trip to Indianapolis to see about getting him started on this. After reading about the Expanded Access Program on their website I believe that my husband certainly qualifies. I have the names of 4 doctors to contact. I am also checking to see if I can find a doctor a little closer to home.
God bless all of you,
Peg
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Thank you so much for your support. We hope to have some answers soon. Doing nothing is no answer.
God bless you for your replies,
Peg
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Thanks to all who responded. We don't know what the oncologist will suggest yet. He wanted to consult with others first and is also talking clinical trial. We just don't know what he will suggest. And he gives us a choice - how on earth would we know what to do??
I am relieved to hear that blood thinners are normal though. That is one relief. Now just to get ready to know what will happen next. We will do anything at this point. My husband is just 52 years old and we have one 15 year old daughter.
Thanks for your prayers and for listening,
Peg
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We received the results of the CT scan and it is not good news. Not only is the taxol/carboplatin not working, the cancer has spread to the other lung. How is it possible to not have anything in one lung, and then two months later have a mass that is 2 1/2 centimeters??? Also, the oncologist put my husband on blood thinner (injections and pills) due to blood clots (pulmonary embolism I believe he said). How normal is this to happen???? My husband Bill is so discouraged and so am I. It seems the last two months of chemo have done nothing. So now we are going to repeat CT scans to the abdomen to check further spread, MRI to check the brain mets, and bone scans to check the bone mets. Can anyone offer any advice or encouragement? We are sitting here stunned, angry and depressed today.
Thanks for any help,
Peg
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We received the results of the CT scan and it is not good news. Not only is the taxol/carboplatin not working, the cancer has spread to the other lung. How is it possible to not have anything in one lung, and then two months later have a mass that is 2 1/2 centimeters??? Also, the oncologist put my husband on blood thinner (injections and pills) due to blood clots (pulmonary embolism I believe he said). How normal is this to happen???? My husband Bill is so discouraged and so am I. It seems the last two months of chemo have done nothing. So now we are going to repeat CT scans to the abdomen to check further spread, MRI to check the brain mets, and bone scans to check the bone mets. Can anyone offer any advice or encouragement? We are sitting here stunned, angry and depressed today.
Thanks for any help,
Peg
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Connie,
When you first get the diagnosis...it's hard to give your head around all of it. It is a horrific shock to the system, your mind, your soul.
Actually - I think I cried every 30 minutes for the first 3 days....then it got better and although I can't say it gets easier....it gets more "manageable".
For one thing...as you begin the treatments - you are DOING something and it seems to feel like you are waging a battle. With each battle won - you feel like you can win the war.
Attitude is EVERYTHING Connie...and the more positive you can remain...the better it will be for your husband.
No one but God knows the number of days we have on this earth. Statistics are not accurate...because we are people, not statistics. Everyone reacts differently to treatment. Also remember this...the statistics are old....the biggest share of "statistics" are based on 20 year studies...starting in the 1980's. There are tons of new drugs and new treatments that are too 'new' to be factored into the numbers. The simple truth? Medical science has never really known time lines and with the fast changing technology and discoveries...it knows even less.
On December 3, 2002 when my husband's cancer returned the doctor told him he could maybe give him a couple of months....Well - it's going on 4 months now.
Today Mike and I went to Denny's for lunch and then went to Walmart to pick up some things. Does this sound like a dying man to you? Not to me. And where there is life - there is hope.
There are a lot of reasons to believe your husband can beat this...you just have to focus on them. Constantly remember - you husband has cancer, he is not dying. Cancer is not an automatic death sentence. Cancer is survivable.
DO NOT listen to doomsayers. There will be those that can't say a thing positive to you. STAY AWAY from them! Surround yourself with hope, life and joy....No one knows if they have tomorrow.
Love and hugs,
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Howard
I highly recommend you take a tape recorder to every - and I mean every - doctor visit. I was shocked at what I "selectively heard" during my visits before tape recording.
I have been on both taxol and taxotere and was very fortunate to have my lung tumor shrink. Also, I had radiation which really helped.
I have been told at least twice that I was going to be dead in 6 months. But, the power of prayer turned things around for me both times and I am now in remission.
Think positive and pray! How is the rest of the family handling this?
Sue M
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Connie,
I too am very scared about my husband who was given a poor prognosis. It really does help to come here and read the posts. Just remember (and I tell myself this) that statistics are averages - just numbers - and many are not up-to-date with all the advances in medicine. I try and just take one day at a time if I can.
Prayers to you,
Peg
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I hear that Zyrtec is effective for the rash. Don't know about it myself. I read it on another message board.
Peg
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Ocean -
I'm not sure there is ever enough time....Take comfort in that your dad is in the presence of Jesus.
Every person is so unique, every person is so special to God.
My deepest sympathy.....
Love and hugs,
Shannon
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I did have Taxol and radiation at the same time and ended up with pneumonitis. I have no idea if the Taxol had anything to do with it or not.
I sure would advise you to check into it just in case since it was brought up here.
Good Luck
Sue M
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From what I have heard back here in Ohio, the PET scan is the most reliable and telling scan available. My oncologist says that if cancer is anywhere in the body, it will "light up".
I think it sounds good for you.
Good Luck
Sue M
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I had several radiation treatments to my right lung and during the treatment experienced extreme tiredness. Also, because it was so close to my throat, I had a difficult time swallowing for a while.
Also, I had radiation pneumonitis which the oncologist says can occur up to several months after radiation. With me it has been scar tissure formation in the raidiated lung, pleural effusion, and extreme shortness of breath. So short of breath that I am on oxygen 24/7 along with a heavy dose of prednisone.
Sue M
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Tami,
I am so sorry for your loss. We never do forget how very special our mothers were to us ( and still are ). God bless you.
Peg
Need some encouragement
in CAREGIVER RESOURCE CENTER
Posted
We had repeat MRI today and bone scans. We took the films with us and tried to read them. It was frustrating since we didn't know what to look for. God, this is awful!!!!! We meet with the oncologist tomorrow. We think Iressa is the next step.
Just hangin on,
Peg