MichelleZP

Hi, My husband is getting a feeding tube put in. Does anyone else have one, or has anyone else had one at any time? Do they ever come out? Is the procedure painful/risky? He seems in good spirits about this. His oncologist only gave ONE patient in 10 years a feeding tube...and now my husband is the second patient to get one. I would like to think this is a good sign as far as his life expectancy as they wouldn't just give him this if he was going to pass anytime soon, no? Call me optimistic but that is all I have - hope. They want his voice to heal and the regurgitation (sp?) irritation to stop so his throat can heal. Thank you,

My husband is 48, I am 35, and he was diagnosed in April 02 w/stage four NSCLC w/mets to the brain, lymph nodes, heart sacs, lungs' pleura, and adrenal gland. He is a fighter and a strong person mentally...he has put up a darn good fight and we choose hope and try to be as optimistic as we can be. I love him dearly and we have had our ups and downs during the past year and 2 months. This is very hard. I don't want to lose him. I don't want to be a widow. I cannot imagine starting a whole relationship over with anyone else. I am sad and scared.

Thank you all for the replies. So I can get a second opinion? Forgive my ignorance but I hadn't a clue any other doctor would touch a case like this. When my husband was first DX in April 02 his first oncologist came in his hospital room, looked at him, and said, "You will be dead in six months, any questions?" WELL...I called and said, "YOU ARE FIRED." That was it. Imagine the poor treatment my husband would have been given had I not fired that doctor! I called Ireland Cancer Center as it is number one in our area along w/the Cleveland Clinic and Ireland took him. His doctor gave him so much hope and he treated the cancer aggressively. Well Bob has had three rounds of chemo and he did WONDERFUL w/each round. He even had a brief remission in the Fall. So, why do they stop chemo after only three rounds? Is it due to the good stuff being killed as well as the cancer and the doctor must decide when enough of the good stuff has been destroyed? I am confused...why can't my husband have more chemo and not just Iressa? I called the makers of Iressa today and was told by THEM it only has a 13% positive response - well that is not good enough for me. I want my husband to have THE BEST...so I should call the Cleveland Clinic in the morning and ask for a second opinion? How would they see him - he is hospitialized. Well I spent the afternoon/early evening w/my husband. He looks good - his color is good. He is VERY down but I got him to smile and laugh several times. He grabbed me and hugged me harder than he ever has and told me how much he loved me. I know he is scared as am I but I won't come across to him as being scared. I won't kill his hope. So while I was there they took him to get a CAT scan of his throat - well, first of all the tech left him down there after the CAT scan was complete - for over a half hour...the lady paged and paged the tech to come get my husband and get him back to his room and my husband said when he did finally show up he smelled like smoke and acted funny! You should have seen how he wheeled my husband in his room...he went SOOOO fast. Then my husband's IV went dry and the alarm went off...we had to wait a half an hour and page the nurse...she said, "Yes." My husband said, "My IV is out and the alarm is going off." She said, "We will be right there." Well a half hour passed before someone came to put a new IV bag on. Then his dinner - he had to fast today due to so many tests - well the man was literally starving so he beeped the nurse and asked for dinner and she said it will be right there. A half hour passed...a nurse came in to tend to the other patient in the room and we reminded her, "Dinner - hungry over here." She said she was sorry and would see what was up. Another half hour went by. I went to the desk and said, "Listen, my husband is STARVING...can you PLEEEEASE call the kitchen now while I am standing here and see where his dinner is?" They called and dinner was up within 5 minutes. Then he asked for his pain meds about eight times as his throat hurts him terribly - I again had to go "remind" them he is in PAIN and he needs his medicine as they didn't give him ANY all day - so they said they would be right in and I said I was waiting right there and would accompany the nurse IN the room as I was not allowing my husband to wait again - so they rushed and got it and I walked w/the nurse to the room and he got his medicine. NOW WHY did I have to run the show? What the heck is wrong w/them? I won't allow my husband to have hunger pains and pain from their lack of good care. WHEW... Now we get the results of the CAT scan to the throat in the morning. My husband cannot drink water or ANY liquid as it aspirates in his lungs due to a faulty valve - I saw the name of this - dysphagia. He needs speech therapy - why, no clue. I am not a doctor but I know enough to know speech therapy alone is not going to cut it. I WANT HIM HOME...he wants to BE HOME...the nurse said he cannot come home until he can have liquids and it does NOT look like he will be able to have liquids for a LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONG time. The oncologist told me he is not planning on keeping Bob long - so how on earth can he come home if he cannot drink liquids? He will dehydrate. What a complication to have. :( CALGON... Thanks for listening - prayers would be most welcome and appreciated.

Hi Don, I understand how frustrating this is. I want to make this better for my husband but "I" cannot do it. It is not in my hands. What I can do is make him happy, lift his spirits, take care of him, arrange his appointments and get him to them, etc. I too take the help from the family as it is exhausting going back and forth plus working, cooking, cleaning, shopping, doing the banking and bill paying, taking care of my dogs, and taking care of my husband. I am only one person and I just get so tired and so flustered at times and I too try to hold it in but at times I just yell as I get SOOOOOOOO upset. We need to let it out at times. Deep breathing has helped me SOOOO much. I am glad to read you are taking your wife out to dinner - that is so nice. My husband and I did lots of things together - we were supposed to go to Cedar Point, it is an amusement park here in Ohio. Well that is on hold as Bob was admitted Sunday morning and is now on oxygen and aspirin for a small blockage in his heart and he was DX w/dysphahia and if it were not for the dysphagia he could come home but since he cannot drink ANY liquid - he needs an IV. I am unsure of the treatment at this time... Hang in there,

Hi Lenny ~ I am a firm believer that attitude is half the battle, ESP when dealing w/cancer. My husband is a very strong minded man and a fighter. When he was first diagnosed it was a shock, but the shock passed quickly for him and he had the will and the determination to FIGHT. He put up a damn good fight and he still is fighting. He had Gemzar - that was his third round of chemo. He did not get sick on it at all - he did on the other two prior to the Gemzar. They gave him anti-nausea meds right in the IV w/the chemo and he had a pill to put under his tongue at home to stop the nausea in its tracks. Best wishes to you.

Thank you all for the replies and the info. They are just going to watch Bob's pleural effusion at this time as he is in the hospital battling two other ailments. He does get shortness of breath so he is on oxygen now. Take care,