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paddy

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Posts posted by paddy

    It hit me out of nowhere today

    in GRIEF

    Posted

    Congratulations on your promotion Beth, this is wonderful!

    I can empathise with you, I have often often wanted to share something with my Dave, my Dearest friend, and I miss him so terribly when that happens.

    Today I went to church and was looking forward to seeing my daughter and her family there. They were'nt there however, so I sat in a pew by myself . In front of me was a tall man with his wife. At one time she put her arm around his shoulder and rubbed his back and I lost it right there and then. I didn't know whether to leave or not, but I just pulled myself together and got through it. Sundays are just the loneliest times I think and seeing all those people with their significant others puts me in a melancholy mood for the rest of the day.

    My Thoughts are with you Beth, you are not alone,

    Paddy

    Paddy.

    3 years since surgery.

    in HOPE

    Posted

    Soooo pleased for you Nina! Congratulations!

    I wanted you to know too that I always enjoy your posts , you have always been so supportive of everyone on the board. I, for one am very grateful for that.

    Paddy

    Looking for suggestions

    in CAREGIVER RESOURCE CENTER

    Posted

    Connie,

    I am so sorry your Mom is in such a bad way and that you find yourselves in such a difficult position.

    I really don't have any good advice, but I have to say that it makes furious when Doctors use such a nonchalant attitude when dealing with patients. Why don't they sit down with you and explain exactly what is going on and why they can't do more about it? It may be difficult to hear, but at least you would understand the situation.

    Thoughts and prayers with you both.

    Paddy.

    Dana Reeves has passed

    in GRIEF

    Posted

    How terribly tragic for their 13 yr. old son and also Christopher's children. She seemed such a lovely woman and so dedicated to her family.

    I have just seen an interview with a doctor at the Cancer Institute of Detroit. She was saying that 15% of people who have lung cancer have never smoked. Does it take a tragedy like this to bring these facts to the public? When will they wake up!!

    Paddy

    My father died

    in GRIEF

    Posted

    So very sorry to hear this Cathy, and, sorry too that the experience with Hospice was not what it should have been. I am glad however that your Dad's passing was peaceful and that your loving Mom was at his side.

    Prayers for peace and strength coming to you and your Mom.

    Paddy

    Embracing the Grief

    in GRIEF

    Posted

    Welcome back Holyanne! You are so right, you have to go through the grief, again and again, before you start to feel stronger. Babies are great healers, you are so lucky to have a little one!

    Paddy

    This keeps happening

    in GRIEF

    Posted

    So sorry you have to go through this Peggy. I too understand exactly what you mean. I have had many experiences similar to yours.

    The other day I was reading a newsletter from an association which Dave and I belonged to and where Dave used to serve on the board. In the minutes of the previous meeting I read this little paragraph. "Member of the board", (shall be nameless,) proposed that Dave ....'s name should be removed from the "absentee" list as he, "had already passed away!"

    When I first read this I felt as if I had been punched in the stomach. I irrationally thought, "How dare they throw my husband off the board as if he were worth nothing!" Of course, the "rational" side of me took over and I realized that while I want to hold on to Dave so badly, others who aren't so personally involved see the reality and accept the fact that he is gone. It still hurts like "You know what" though.

    Keeping you in my thoughts,

    Paddy

    Grief/Mourning

    in GRIEF

    Posted

    Pat,

    I am so sorry for your pain, I know how unbearable it is. There have been many times when I have thought I would rather die than go on without my man.

    My only advise to you would be to let yourself feel the pain. Sob, rant, scream, but get it out. Each time you let yourself grieve/mourn you will feel stronger. That is not to say that you will miss Brian any less or that their won't be times when memories come out of-the-blue and knock you back into the "pit" again, but just that you learn how to handle the grief a little better.

    A book that helped me a lot is called "Widow to Widow" by "Genevieve Davis Ginsburg,M.S. It is worth reading.

    If I can help at all, please email me.

    Love Paddy

    Fay A. passes away Feb 28, 2006

    in GRIEF

    Posted

    Bob,

    I hadn't been to the board for a few days and I am so very sad to read your post. Fay was a great friend to us all you will have realized after reading all these wonderful messages. She was so selfless and even though suffering herself found time and energy to help people with their problems. She has helped me personally and I had the pleasure of talking to her on the phone a couple of times. I am so grateful for that. Fay A will be missed terribly.

    My heartfelt condolences to you and your family.

    Paddy

    Irrational Resentment

    in GRIEF

    Posted

    I feel so sad for you. It is so hard not to feel resentful. I sometimes resent the fact that my grandchildren will not remember my husband.

    Go easy on your MIL though, she may be getting a little forgetful, and, at least she did phone and ask for the exact date, so that she wouldn't forget Carolyn's birthday altogether!

    It would be wonderful if you could write a special story about your Mom for your little girl. You can read it to her when she is old enough and then she will know just how cool her grandma was and how much she loved her.

    Paddy

    No Memorial Service -My Choice

    in HOPE

    Posted

    Fay, I am so sorry to hear such sad words from you. I wish you didn't have to think such thoughts.

    Since you phoned me, quite a long time ago now, I have often wondered what you looked like. Now I know - your face matches your lovely speaking voice!

    Sending positive thoughts and prayers your way,

    Paddy.

    So worried

    in CAREGIVER RESOURCE CENTER

    Posted

    Fear is clutching my heart again. Tonight one of my dearest friends informed me that her 37 year old daughter, (a new Mom, who has been undergoing a "cocktail" chemo for breast cancer and who is to have a "lumpectomy" and "lymphectomy" next week,) has been found to have a "spot" on her lung. What horrifies me is that the Onc has told them that he is "not going to bother about the lung for now" he says that the chemo "should take care of that"!! They are not even sure yet if the spot is malignant, but wouldn't you expect them to take tests..perhaps even while she is having the lumpectomy??! I suppose I am panicking, but I know how fast these things grow and I am so scared for this lovely girl.

    What makes it worse is that my friend, who saw me through my husbands illness and was there for me minutes after he had passed away, is in CA and I am now in MI! I can only try to support her by phone and that just doesn't seem to be enough !

    Paddy

    Harder than the funeral...

    in GRIEF

    Posted

    I'm so sorry Jen, it must be so tough for you all right now. You will probably find yourself bursting into tears out of the blue for a while yet. I went into an elevator in a clinic the other day and there was a lady there in a hospital bed with all sorts of tubes and things hooked up to her. I held it back until she was taken away and then I almost collapsed. Seeing this lady brought everything flooding back and I was suddenly a mess again.

    In time things will be easier for you and until then I will be sending my thoughts and prayers.

    Paddy

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