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Cowboy Logic


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A cowboy was herding his cows in a remote pasture when suddenly a

brand-new BMW advanced out of a dust cloud towards him.

The driver, a young man in a YSL suit, Fendi shoes, Bulgari sunglasses &

an Armani tie leans out the window and asks the cowboy,

"If I tell you exactly how many cows and calves you have in your herd,

will you give me a calf?"

The cowboy looks at the man, obviously a yuppie, then looks at his

peacefully grazing herd and calmly answers, "Sure. Why not?"

The yuppie parks his car, whips out his Dell notebook computer, connects

it to his AT&T cell phone, surfs to a NASA page on the Internet, where

he calls up a GPS satellite navigation system to get an exact fix on

his location which he then feeds to another NASA satellite that scans

the area in an ultra-high-resolution photo. The young man then opens the

digital photo in Adobe Photoshop and exports it to an image processing

facility in Hamburg, Germany.

Within seconds, he receives an email on his Palm Pilot that the image

has been processed and the data stored. He then accesses a MS-SQL

database through an ODBC connected Excel spreadsheet with hundreds of complex calculations. He uploads all of this data via an email on his Blackberry and, after a few minutes, receives a response.

Finally, he prints out a full-color, 150-page report on his hi-tech,

miniaturized HP LaserJet printer and finally turns to the cowboy and

says, "You have exactly 1586 cows and calves."

"That's right. Well, I guess you can take one of my calves," says the


He watches the young man select one of the animals and looks on amused as the young man stuffs it into the trunk of his car.

Then the cowboy says to the young man, "Hey, if I can tell you exactly

what your business is, will you give me back my calf?" The young man

thinks about it for a second and then says, "Okay, why not?"

"You're a political consultant." says the cowboy.

"Wow! That's correct," says the yuppie, "but how did you guess that?"

"No guessing required." answered the cowboy. "You showed up here even though nobody called you; you want to get paid for an answer I already knew, to a question I never asked; and you don't know anything about my business.......Now give me back my dog.

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