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confused and worried


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Does anyone ever have trouble with their loved one not doing everything they can to keep themselves healthy. My husband has always done a great job of taking care of himself and getting really healthy since his diagnosis 18 months ago but for the last month he has been not eating the right things and has not been working out as much as he used to and messes up with his medication and then argues with me whenever I ask him to please get back with his program. I really do not understnad what is going on. right now he has residual spots on his adrenals and one lymph node is affected but everything else is clear. He should be feeling great and really giving it his all but something is up. Any help would be appreciated.

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My dad did something like that for a while. He would pretend to take his pills and I saw him spit them out five minutes later. He even did this in the hospital a few times. He had bursts of energy where he would want to go and try to walk or just get out and go somewhere- to just staying home- too weak to even want to try.

I believe in my dad's case, two things attributed to his behavior. "Control", because cancer patients have so little of it, perhaps he wanted some say and control over what he did or took that day...and then later- it was the effects of brain radiation that left blisters throughout his mouth. He couldn't swallow the larger pills anylonger and only pretended to take them, because he didn't want to tell us about his pain and make us worry. It wasn't until he was unconsious that I noticed how bad his throat and mouth were. HE was the one in pain, yet he was worried and protecting US.

I think maybe your loved one is exercising his "power" and might just be showing himself that in the midst of all this madness- he is still in control. Talk to him. Understand where he is coming from, and then ask him what he wants to do.

Good luck and God Bless.

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