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Thursday's air


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I decided to jump in here and open today. I have been pretty much just checking facebook on my phone. My granddaughter started classes again and I am afraid to mess something up on her computer.

I came to my oldest son's last night. I will stay here until I leave on Monday. In a week from Saturday I will be home. As always I am excited and ready. At the same time I dread leaving my family. My daughter and her whole family understand why I don't live here. My two boys just don't get it. They have never had to live away from eachother or live without any close friends like I did for so many years. Having someone who shares the same kind of memories and even the same ones becomes more important as I get older. Still it is always so hard to leave them and I can't imagine living here again right now. Weather plays havoc with my health and life style doesn't help. I know they go out of the way to spend time with me when I am here but they all have busy lives. I would not see them often other than holidays and family occasions and there are 365 days in the year where I want to live and enjoy all of the places and things that I love. I don't want to live alone in a place that I just don't really like and spend my life waiting for holidays and family time. Do I make any sense? In a perfect world I could have both but this one is far from perfect.

This is a rough time of year for me. Yesterday was a year that we lost my sister in law Sherrell. On Monday it will be 2 months sense my niece Jacci died. I will be stopping there the last night before I get home and I know that it will hit me like a hammer that she is not there anymore either. Jaccis daughter asked me if I wanted all of her yarn. I said yes so I will be taking that home with me. I guess that really makes it seem real.

The day before yesterday I saw a robin for the first time sense the day after Sherrell died. In fact I saw 3 of them. I have also been dreaming about Johnny a lot. Night before last I had two dreams about him. I keep wondering why but I think it is probably because of all of the other losses this past year and also because it was about this time 53 years ago that we met and fell in love. Hard to believe it has been so long.

It is humid and mucky here and I am so ready for California weather even if it is wet and cold right now. I know some of you like this weather but I never have.

Becky I am so glad to see your good news and MI Judy you are still in my prayers for a speedy recovery and getting home.

Well I guess I will run for now. Hope you all enjoy a peaceful day. Lillian

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I'm just stopping in to say hi quickly. Have actually gotten started with some of this year-end stuff I have been putting off.

Lily - glad you have had a wonderful visit, but I do indeed understand about not wanting to live there. When my parents died I briefly moved to Redding to be closer to my son and his family. In my grief it seemed like a good idea, but in reality it was a disaster. I left my home, my friends, my job, and of course my son and his family lived a very busy life - and so I just found myself alone - as you said waiting for the holidays. I stayed 9 months and moved back to Medford. And moving 2000 miles away to the humid south - would be much worse than Medford to Redding!!

I must have missed Becky's good news - but I don't really do FB. I'll check to see if I missed it on here.

Happy Thursday all.

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Hi there,

Not much activity here! But I came on to pipe in. Becky your news, I didn't see it. I guess I'll go to FB to see what is up. No matter what congrats!

Day 23 in the hospital. I met with a pain doctor today who scrapped the six medications that the other doctors prescribed. He said he can get me pain free in a few days with a few less medications and a simple plan. We reviewed it and liked it. He even said he could make my bad foot pain free! Wow! That is fantastic. We'l give him a shot. Why not?

Anyway, I'm tired. Had big expectations today of going home and then the big let down. Now big changes in medications, and the assurance that we will be going home by 11:00 tomorrow. Yeah!

Judy in MI

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