Hello Everyone - My name is Mary Lou. My best friend had the lower part of her right lung removed last year and then underwent both chemotherapy and radiation. She recovered fairly quickly, she had less and less trouble breathing and the residual pain eventually cleared. Her checkups were normal for a while.
Last week she learned that she now has cancer in her left lung. She started Tarceva a couple of days ago and is already experiencing sensitivity and soreness in her mouth. Fortunately, her insurance covers all but $50 of the monthly $2506.75 cost for the meds. I've researched Tarceva on the Internet and it sounds like a very powerful drug.
I am writing for a couple of reasons. First, I want to know how best to support my dear friend. She lives in Alaska and I live now in Massachusetts, a half a world away. I haven't seen her since I moved back here 5-1/2 years ago to care for my mother.
Last year I called my friend frequently during her hospitalization and convalescence, prayed for her all the time, sent her relaxing music to listen to while she recovered, books to read, cards, etc. I will surely do the same now, but it all seems so inadequate. I should be there with her and I'm devastated because I can't afford to go and see her. I'd move back and be with her if I could. I want to hug her, hold her hand, cry with her, laugh with her, pray with her.
Which brings me to another reason for writing to you. Learning my friend has lung cancer again and that she likely has cancer in some other as yet unfound spot in her body (according to her doctor), has me all twisted up inside. Last year I felt so optimistic that she would survive the cancer. Today I feel like the horrible cancer has only been hiding somewhere in her body, waiting to find a place to grow and take over.
I need your help in finding that optimism again. My friend believes that she will again fight this disease and win. I've been with her through many hard times, including other serious medical problems, and she has indeed fought and won every time. Her faith in God is huge and is a huge strength for her.
Please help me. Help me know how best to support her this time. Help me to be strong so I can be there for her in every way I can. I love her so much and I want her to live. She has a wonderful husband, many children and grandchildren. She's planning to retire in January so she and her husband can travel and enjoy themselves. I want everything good for her. But right now I have to admit I'm feeling terribly selfish because I don't want her to be sick again, I don't want her to have to put those chemicals in her body again, I don't want her to have to suffer any more side effects, any more pain. I don't want to lose her.
I'm so glad you all are here. I know my friend from A.A. We met there 19 years ago when I first got sober. I know the beauty and closeness and honesty of self-help groups. I trust I will find that here as well.
Thank you so much,
Mary Lou
P.S. I don't have a picture of my friend and I or even of myself alone, so I've posted a picture of my little buddies, Tansy and Cabot. They are a daily blessing.