SharonKay

I discovered I had lung cancer in decemeber 2022. Once I told my sister she wanted me to start calling and informing a list of people so she could talk about it! I said no and she got mad. I then told her that I did not want her telling people at holiday parties. She again got mad. Ultimately she ghosted discussions about me and when my mother was asked about me by cousins, she shussed her. For one thing, I can understand why people don't disclose lung cancer. Part of the reason I did not want to be the topic of holiday gossip. Plus, at the time, I had not discussed it with all of my children and it upset me that my sister was all about having something juicy to talk about. For another thing, my family just completely ignored me instead of offering any support or empathy - at my sisters down-playing because I told her not to (while intending to tell close family only) and evident upset that I did not want her to use me as party gossip. I got absolutely zero support from family. Since I missed a holiday gathering - which was early due to sister being out of town and dinner centered around sibling's plane schedule as they all chose to leave on christmas eve and christmas - my brothers and sisters did not give gifts. (I had actually bought gifts for family prior to surgery) Seems they/she got mad that I did not travel in zero degree weather 30 miles on bad roads. Fun times. My children (adults) could not make it either because they were working during the week and as well, did not want to risk travel during the extreme weather. I mean really? Choosing not to travel while in recovery from a lobectomy is something most people would understand, especially when the weather was dangerous. Has anyone else had family just completely diss you, withholding any type of support, during a cancer crisis?