Beth R

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I am so sorry for your loss. My mother was diagnosed in January 07 and died 21 May 07. It happenned so quickly. On Wednesday it will be 6 months. I know how it feels and I am sorry.

I am glad your day went well. I have been following your posts and I am very sorry for your loss.

I haven't posted here in a bit. My mother died in 4 months, and I was there till the end. She won the over 60 marathon in Oct 06, and dead in May 07. What the hell. I miss her very much, and at times I cannot deal, but I have also learned to appreciate life much more. I decided that after her death, I should live life more the way she did, yet she was very anxious. She saved money, and what did it matter when her life was taken that quick? So, I guess there needs to be a balance of having fun and saving money in case the fun ends a little sooner than you expected. I am having fun now. Going out, socializing more than usual, and doing things I would not normally do. Not worrying all the time about what the future will bring, because the future is very unpredictable. Then, I feel guilty, but if it was not for her death, then I would be stuck in my same damn rut, and not appreciating every day. And,I would rather she was alive with me here today. I appreciate my friends and family more. My mother gave me a very mixed blessing in her death.

So sorry Flowergirlie.

Wow Nick. You are very genuine. I always could sense that within your posts. It really is hard. I thought about life....a person can have many sons and daughters, but each person can only have one mother. Losing your mother is the ultimate existential loss.

Melinda, I think it is people's way of trying to help. Get you with someone else and hope that your pain fades away. People don't like to see others alone.

That is so sad. I am glad you celebrated his birthday for him. That is meaningful for your family.

Hello All, I came back to Ohio a week ago. My mother was in serious pain that you cannot imagine. My wonderful stepfather has been doing his best and I feared for his collapse. We decided to hospitalize her last Wed to get the pain medication in order. She has not been able to walk for a number of weeks now. He told me a week ago that prognosis was 30-60 days. She is doing much better on a morphine drip and methadone pills. We are going to have to approach Hospice in the next couple of days. She will not take well to that and thinks that Alimta will really do something. I was hoping to get things organized before I returned to home on the West Coast, but I wonder should I stay? Something really great....my Mom has tons of great friends. They are going to do her birthday a few days earlier, and it looks like we are going to have it in the hospital. They said they can work with that....and there will be 12-15 people to celebrate! I am hoping I can make it through all that without crying, because it is so special and Mom just loves a party. Thanks Much for listening to me.

I m really sorry Grace. Life is really tough sometimes.

Thankyou All. You are very nice people. I am now in Ohio, and my mom is doing very poorly. My sister and I are going to speak to the DR tomorrow regarding meds. She has so much pain and nothing seems to help. It is very heartbreaking. Sometimes I wish that she would go very soon, because her pain is so great. She started Alimta, but if she is on that,then Hospice won't be involved. I think that she need medication management.

Hello All, Just an update....my Mom completed chemo, and kept most of her hair. The bad news is that the cancer is in her bones, and 70% of her pelvis is gone. They are putting her on methadone now. Radiation is not doing much good. There are 2 Home Health Aides assisting my stepfather with her care. I go back to the Buckeye State on Sat. It is all so heartbreaking. How can this happen this quickly? In Feb she was walking somewhat, by March a walker, and just a couple of weeks later, bed bound and wheelchair. She does not want to know her prognosis, and my stepfather and sister and doctors are talking in "code" so to speak, because she does not want to know anything. She is very frightened now too. I am so so sad. I am scared to lose my mother. Thanks for listening. I feel so alone. (though I am not really, but yet it feels that way) I wish she was not in so much pain.

Hello All, Just an update....my Mom completed chemo, and kept most of her hair. The bad news is that the cancer is in her bones, and 70% of her pelvis is gone. They are putting her on methadone now. Radiation is not doing much good. There are 2 Home Health Aides assisting my stepfather with her care. I go back to the Buckeye State on Sat. It is all so heartbreaking. How can this happen this quickly? In Feb she was walking somewhat, by March a walker, and just a couple of weeks later, bed bound and wheelchair. She does not want to know her prognosis, and my stepfather and sister and doctors are talking in "code" so to speak, because she does not want to know anything. She is very frightened now too. I am so so sad. I am scared to lose my mother. Thanks for listening. I feel so alone. (though I am not really, but yet it feels that way) I wish she was not in so much pain.

I am so so very sorry.

I am so so sorry. I started reading your posts in earlyJanuary, and though I don't know you, you seem like a really strong person. I believe that he is taking out his fear and frustration on you, but that won't stop the pain that you feel. It really sucks, I am sorry Flowergirlie.