Bettina

I know grieving are individual, but sometimes i wonder..... My mother passed away two months ago. Of course I cried a lot the first couple of days, but want back to normal quite fast. At the funeral i wasn't able to cry anymore. Thought it was beautiful, but not sad. The weeks after has been busy helping my dad sorting out papers, clothing and the usual things. I have been fighting with her from start until her death. Been there at every scan, dr. app., chemo session, operation. My dad was in denial in 16 months, and just wanted to go to work instead. He's been reacting on another level: visiting her grave every day, crying a lot etc. I feel the pressure was taken from my shoulder, and somehow relieved....At the same time i don't feel a need for visiting the grave, or crying. I keep telling myself its because I was there all the time, I knew this was going to happen, and i'm strong. But is it the truth? Or am I just not grieving yet? I think this actually is a bit too "easy" Please share your experiences with me Brgds, Bettina

It doesn't sound like "normal" symptoms. Often people tell about sparkling lights or spots, and double vision. When my mother was diagnosed, she had blinking spots in her right eye, and two days later were talking strange. I don't think the symptoms disappear again - Unless something anti-flammitory like prednisone make swelling go away. Let us know, when you know, Bettina Bettina

Hi all, Unfortuantly my mums "hopefully NED" did not turn out to be NED. Brain clear, Lung clear - YES! And an enlargement of af node in the axilla area meas. 1,3 x 1,7 was noted. But doctors were pretty sure it was reactive from surgery. Untill she examined.. Suddently she was looking vey stressed, and told us there were two nodes high in the axilla. Were talking about biopsy and ultrasound. Mum went to ultrasound and biopsy last week. The doctor took the test, and told her "it almost looked infectious" - mum were thrilled! Last week we went to see the oncologist for answer: It was metastasis. I asked for a cell type to be sure: They told me it was an adenocarcinom. I was quite confused: After surgery our doctor told us it was the large-cell in the lung, and now they are talking about an adeno being a metastasis of the lung? Also confused because there were no metastasis elsewhere, and the doctor examined the nodes in chest to be N0 during and have not spread to the chest wallsurgery? Both her brain metastadis were gone after her first round of cisplatin + vinorelbine, but axilla nodes wasn't there at surgery in march, but 2 x 2 centimeters now? Is such a mixed progression normal? And now what is making me really angry: They have said they would treat it like an lung cancer, and give her taxotere. Wouldnt it make sene to make a mammography at this point? And wouldnt radiation help at this point? I know this is a very long post - sorry! Just wanted to get your opinion Hugs, Bettina

Hi Teresa, I was going through the exact same thing with my mum. They did a biopsy with a fine needle the first two times. No malign cells were detected. 3rd time they did af biopsy with a greater needle, and mum said they were a strange crushing sound she didn't hear the first two times. And the answer was: no malign cells again. Still a shadow though. They decided to open her up to see what was hiding in there; And it was cancer afterall. A 7 cm big tumor - how can you miss that three times Later on i saw an article describing the problem. A adenokarcinom can often be left with a necrotic center without cells in the middle. So that could be the case... On the other hand: Maybe it isn't cancer afterall? Also maske sure that both nodes are cancer. If only theres one cancer node, it oculd be an early lungecancer, which have great survivalodds Good luck to you and your father. Brdgs, Bettina

Dont feel guilty! Vi all need to get away from our caregiverrole some times, and remebering ourselfes. I felt a relief moving from my parents house info my own again. Its really difficult being "stucked" around sick people all day Brgds, Bettina

Don't know if you remember, but my mum was "NED" after the chemo removed her brain metasis a month ago. She called me frightened the other day, because she had a seizure. She was talking about seeing a small blinking spot on her eyes. It went away 15 minutes later, and since then there have been nothing. She was presenting with the same symptom, when she was diagnosed. But at that time the spot didn't disappear from her eye She was also talking about her vision the last couple os days were getting a little blurry. She called the hospital and made an agreement to talk with a doktor on friday. I'm just wondering - Could it be the chemo affecting her vision - Or are we facing a reccuring brain met? Could it be a blood clot instead? Anyone with experience? Her treatment is Cisplatin + Vinorelbine. Best Regards, Bettina

Sis, My mom has a incredible respose with Vinorelbine (navelbine). Her two brain mets completly dissappered efter 2 x navelbine! Good luck with your friend! Brgds, Bettina

hi, I'm new here. Have been looking into this great message board for a month now - So now it must be my turn to write something I'm sorry my english is quite bad, but i live in Denmark, and are not use to use it everyday. Some good news...My mom had an operation 2 months ago for a single met. Unfortuantly the surgeon called 1 month ago after an MRI-scan. He could now see that he hasn't been able to remove the met completly. And one more was beginning to show up - now 0.8 cm. Then he planned an SRS-session to remove them today. They did another MRI yesterday, and she told us today, that both mets was gone!! No SRS for my mum today He's pretty sure it's the chemo (cisplatin + vinorelbine) that did its job. She only had 1 serie until now So - NED for the first time since diagnosis in january! Bettina