vespa68
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Posts posted by vespa68
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What a fruit loop... and not the good kind. I am so sorry this happend to you. The mind has so much power over the body and your mamma needs to be in a good place mentally. All is not not lost though, just don't let witchy woman back in the house. Sadly, I have been coming in contact with people in the medical profession with this attitude. Afterall it's not their loved one who is suffering. I would think their attitude would be differnt if it were. Just quietly envision "insert neck here and squeeze"
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Sending a prayer for your dad and you as well. Stay strong my friend.
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A lot has happend since the last time I posted. We now know that my mom is in early stage 4 lung cancer. It is in both lungs. The radioologist does not think it has spread to her liver, perhaps another test would show that. She has done two rounds of chemo. She is on taxol and carbo. This is done every three weeks. The day that she has chemo she is her old self. After that she does not want to get dressed or leave the house. She was eating lots of lamb, now she'll eat a bananna, toast, butter beans ect, but nothing like she was eating first round of chemo.
Over the 4th of July holiday, her lung collasped. She spent 4 days in the hospital. Her other children have told me that she is alone in this. That she has brought this on herself for smoking for all of those years. They are also bitter over money that they belived they should have gotton 30 years ago(that's another story).
I don't know what to do. My siblings have told me that I too am alone in this. My mom has went from 147lbs to 130lbs.I cry all of the time. I pray that God won't take her just yet. I read about all of the sucess stories but then I tell myself well, with them it was caught early to operate or they don't have the same kind of lung cancer that she has or they recieved better care, or were in better health. The list goes on and on as to why certain people beat it and others don't.
She has lost most of her hair, but not all. She has strands that just don't want to come out. I know I am rambling, but I am so heart sick and frusrated at at how I am being treated and all of the pain that my mom must feel being left by children she brought into this world.
Thank you for listening to me. I really appreciate it. Ves
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Great big hugs are being sent to you and your mom. My day was off to a rough start, but YOU made me feel better.
I want to hear more stories like that. This monster is not going to take such good people away from us as easliy as it may have thought. Your mom is a tough cookie. Good for her!!!!!!!! -
I have to say that I would have asked the same question, just because I would be curious to know the answer. A lot of people still don't know or understand that people who never smoked in their life still get lung cancer. Dana Reeves is an excellent example. I have been chatting with people recently who have lung cancer and never smoked. They did however work in bars before the smoking ban was put in place. Now a lot of those workers are paying a hefty price.
As for as the military dad, I would have been p..... too. I see people all of the time hoding up cardboard signs while smoking. I understand it is a hard habit to break. I read that is essier to quit herorin than it is to quit smoking.
People will ask about about my dad and I will say that he died of cancer. The question that always follows is "what kind?" When I respond with Pancreatic cancer. The question that follows is "was he a drinker?" I respond with "He was an alcholic."
I don't think it is so much as the person trying to place blame on the person with cancer. I think it is more of them showing what they know or have heard about cancer. It is also a way to keep the conversation moving and they are showing interest. I don't think that lady was passing judjment, she was only showing interest in you.
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I am so sorry to hear that you are going through such a difficult time. Marriage is already stressful enough, but then you add lung cancer and a parent you treasure into the mix, it is very hard to deal with. I have been married for 9 years. I don't have children, but I do have pets. Do they count? My mom never thought she would live this long, so she never planned for anything. I am not giving up hope on her, but I am planning for her burial. The thing is, my husband loves stuff. He does not know the value of a dollar and has basically bankrupt us. I had money set aside and that is gone. I had funds on a credit card, but when we got into financial trouble, those credit card companies closed my accounts for fear that I would use all of that $20,000 credit line.
Perhaps the best thing would be for your dad to move in. Could you go and stay with him for a short time? I wish to God that you were not dealing with this. My prayers to you, your Dad, your husband and your children. Heep strong and never give up.
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Hi, I just read your post about how your mom didn't know she was sick. My mom broke her arm and had to been seen. While they did x-rays they found the cancer. My mom looks great, is active and in no way saw this coming. I don't want your mom to beat herself up for this because it's not her fault! It is a very sneaky disease. The mindset I am trying to get out of is that cancer puts a time limit on us. Every person regardless how young is not promised tomoorrow. Please go to your mom and have the best time possible and know it probably won't be the last time you will see her. I am sending you big hugs and many prayers your way. Vespa
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Nova, Big hugs to you!!!!!! I feel you frusrtration. Write a letter to cancer and post it here. Tell it what a monster it has been, but it is not going to defeat you. That your hope, faith and love is stronger that it will ever be. Tomorrow is another day and it will get better. Vespa
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Hello, I am very happy to be here. I tried the live chat on Tuesday, but I don't type very fast or very well for that matter. If you saw my name,but didn't see me say anything, that is why.
Mom has 2 appointments today, or should have said had 2 appoinments today. One was for 10:30 this morning, but she missed it. She dosen't like mornings and is resentful for a morning appointment. She has another this afternoon, but she does not want to go. She has never really been grouded in reality and so far it has worked for her. Now I'm not so sure. It is very frusrating for me, because I can't make her go.
I am her youngest child. She has 3 others, but have been estranged from them for more than 20 years. They don't know that she has cancer and she dosen't want them to know. I have had limited contact with my oldest brother's wife. The last time I talked to her she told me she was told she was not to have any contact with me because of my relationship with my mom. If she was to keep in contact with me it would have to be a secret because my brother has forbidden her from having anything to do with me. This brother is 20 years older than me and was married and out of the house by the time I was born. I can probably count on one hand the times I have seen him in person.
The only people that know that she has cancer are her doctors and those that read this board. All of your prayers and well wishes mean a lot to me. I thank you all for taking the time to write a note to me.
There was a mention about her talking to someone about this. I don't think she would do it. I have thought about a social woker or a cancer survivor, but I don't think she in that place yet. The only time we talk about it is when we are talking about appoiments.
She has a PET scan tomorrow and I told her she can't have her morning cup of coffee, that did not go over well. She insists that she is fine and the doctors are trying to make her sick. Because doctors are motivated by money and all.
I need to get her ready for her appoinment today. She is dressed. Getting her in the car is going to be a battle.
Thank you for listening. Vespa
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Thank you so much for all of your support. You have no idea what it means to me. Big hugs to all of you.
Nick C. mentioned a brain mri. That so far has not been talkied about.
Last week when she saw the surgeon for the first time, he ordered a bunch of tests and they are all clustered together.
Today she had a breath test done. Fisrt, they took blood from her wrist because they needed blood from an atery. They put her in this machine where she had to blow into a hose with clips on her nose. They kept the door to the machine open, but they did have to close it for a few more tests. She did not like that as she does not like small spaces. While she was doing these tests, her blood work came back and it looks good. She is not anemic as she thought she might be.
Todays visit was fine. After we left I took her to lunch. She still has a great appetite.
When she was there on Friday, June 15th, she had a needle stuck in the lump in her neck to make sure it is cancer. The 2 docters were fine with us, joking and what not, but when only one came back in the room with such a long face, well we didn't know what to make of it. I thought maybe he was thinking of a fight he may have had with his wife/girlfriend, or perhaps his shorts were too tight. Who knows. But when he came back in after looking at this thing with a microscope, his demeaner had changed. He shook my mon's hand and said it had been a pleaseure meeting her and walked out. That is when the surgen came in and said that he could not operate and she would not be seeing him again.
She sees her primary Dr. on Thursday and goes in for a PET scan on Friday. They want her to start Chemo this week, but so far she is not on board with that.
I firmly believe in the power of prayer and the power of hope. I am praying for all of you wonderful people who are sharing such a personal journey. My thoughts and prayers are with you, as well as your family and friends.
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Hello Everybody, I have been reading all of your stories for the past few days and I am so comforted by them. I have gone back and reread them several times.
On March 4th 2007 my 77 year old mom was walking the dog and fell. She broke her right arm. My husband and I took her to the emergency room where she was treated and released. Two months went by and her arm wasn't healing right. She went to another hospital, U.C. Davis Medical Center. There they took an x-ray that revelaed a black mark on her lung. The doctor ordered a ct scan. The ct scan came back and it did not look good. My mom had smoked for 69 years and because of this she was told that it was probably cancer. She would have to see a specialist to know for sure. An appointment was made with a thoracic surgeon at U.C. Davis Cancer Center. He felt around on her neck and found a lump. He gave his opinion of what it might be. He ordered a biposy.
The results cam back and it is lung cancer. The doctor said he could not operate. It stated in the lung and has spread, but not sure how far. She goes in tomorrow for a breathing test and a PET is set for this month. She is susposed to start chemo next week and does not want to because she does not want to lose her hair.
My mom is very active and does not look sick. She is 5'2 and is 147 lbs. When she was told all of this, I went on-line to find symptoms and she does not have any symptoms.
My mom is my best buddy and I am so scared for her. I'm most afraid of the unknown. I don't know anyone who has had lung cancer, so I don't know what to expect.
I do know that her diet needs to change. She loves Burger King and Denny's. Right now she is living with me and I would not have it any other way.
When she was told that she has lung cancer she said that she could care less, that she just wants use of her arm back.
I know there is along road ahead, but I will do whatever it takes toget her better.
Thank you for your time and for listening to me ramble.
Dad Started Hospice Care Yesterday (Near the End)
in CAREGIVER RESOURCE CENTER
Posted
I know your heart must be breaking sweetness. I am sending you and your dad great big hugs and prayers.