Marci
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Posts posted by Marci
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Once again I have had words with one of my mother's siblings. She told me you know you're not the only one going through this. I know I am being selfish saying that my pain is more than anyone else's but I am her daughter and feel like my world is coming to an end at any minute. My aunt also told me that I need to stop stressing my mom out. My mom has outbursts of anger at little things and since I am there I am the cause of whatever has happened. My mom was always a passionate verbal person and can be very hyper over the littlest thing even without the burden of cancer so now it just intensifies it. It hurts me that all these family members keep hurting me. My aunt told me to stop doing all things like cleaning my mom's bathrooms and stuff if I am going to go up and stress her out. She told me she can go without clean bathrooms for the lack of all the stress I bring upstairs. My aunts just don't know that my mom is having these outbursts of anger without anyone doing or saying things to her. I am just so sick of all this with these family members. Then they want to give me an education on how sick my mom is - HELLO I live here I know how sick she is. As if the possibility of losing my mom wasn't enough now this is what I have to endure. Sorry for the long vent!
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Thank you to all of you. With this support I don't feel alone anymore. I am thinking of all of you and your loved ones as well and sending my warmest wishes and prayers for good health and peace in hearts.
My Best to All,
Marci
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Hi All,
Lately my mom's siblings/my aunts have been very critical with me. I live in a basement apartment downstairs from my moms thank goodness. I am able to clean, cook, and have access to my mom to make it easier for both of us. The problem is - is that I mentioned to my aunt that one night while venting from doing all the chores and running around that the stress level is different for me than it is for them. She took offense and said it was not. My husband strongly disagrees because he does see the change in our lives that happened over night. Their households remain the same -mine is different. Alot different. When I was venting to her I wasn't looking for credit I really was just venting b/c this is new for me too and need to talk to someone once in awhile. I have since figured out that just b/c its family I can't take for granted they understand. Anyone else experiencing this too?
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Hawkeye - how do I know what are going through. My mom snaps at me for breathing the wrong way right now - well almost. Now she is starting to do it to my stepfather. I think it may make them feel in control or something when all the other stuff is out of their control. Try to grin and bear it - and I know that sounds easy since others have been telling me the same thing. Just know someone else is going through the very same things as you and feel better knowing that you should be so proud of all the things you do and that the loved one really knows that inside!
Best-
Marci
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Hi MichiganLisa,
The biopsy is to tell whether its cancer or not and to stage it. Depending if it is and what stage it is there are different options for people. I hope your mom's biopsy comes back negative for cancer and she and you won't have to worry too much.
Take Care,
Marci
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Thanks to all of you and thank you to KatieB and husband who created this wonderful place to come and find help and advice. I have to take this day by day - minute by minute I am learning. I will tell you though something miraculous happened last night after I posted yesterday about worrying about work and getting mom to treatment I prayed last night for God to send me his helpers and he did this a.m. - I got another volunteer who lives up the street from us to help drive mom. Grateful for the little things now.
Many Blessings-
Marci
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THANKS RANDYW FOR THE SUPPORT. I THINK EVEN THOUGH THERE MAY NOT BE A SOLUTION RIGHT THIS MINUTE KIND WORDS HELP EASE THE ANXIETY.
HOPE YOU ARE DOING WELL AND SENDING WARM WISHES TO YOU.
THANKS
MARCI
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HEY JACKIE-
THANKS FOR THE ADVICE. I WOULD NEVER MAKE MY MOM FEEL GUILTY AT ALL! I AM THE ONE WHO FEELS THE GUILT DUE TO THE FACT THAT WORK IS THE LAST PLACE I WANT TO BE EVER NOW AND UNFORTUNATELY I HAVE TO GO TO WORK IN ORDER TO KEEP THE ROOF OVER OUR HEADS AND ALSO GET MY MOM TO ALL THE DR'S APPTS AND STUFF. I WOULD GIVE ANYTHING TO GIVE UP THIS JOB AND STAY W/MY MOM EVERYDAY TO MAKE SURE SHE IS OK BUT ITS JUST NOT MY REALITY. I AM JUST CONFUSED ON WHAT TO DO.EVERY MORNING I LEAVE THE HOUSE MY HEART TUGS AND I JUST FEEL AWFUL GOING TO WORK. I AM PRAYING TO GOD TO ASSIST ME WITH THIS.
MARCI
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HI ALL,
JUST REALIZED I SHOULD HAVE POSTED THIS UNDER FAMILY MEMBERS/CAREGIVERS! OOPS!
MARCI
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HI ALL,
I AM AND WILL BE THE CAREGIVER TO MY MOM FOR MOST OF THE TIME. MY GRANDMOTHER ALSO (HER MOTHER) WHO IS GETTING UP THERE IN AGE WILL ALSO BE HELPING ME WITH GETTING HER BACK AND FORTH TO CHEMO AND SUCH. I FEEL AWFUL HAVING MY GRAMS DO THIS BUT I AM ALSO WORKING AT A NEW JOB. I KNOW MY STATE HAS FAMILY MEDICAL LEAVE BUT I WON'T BE ELIGIBLE UNTIL I HAVE COMPLETED A YEAR AND THAT WON'T BE FOR ANOTHER 6 MONTHS. ANY ADVICE OR SIMILAR GUILT FOR OTHERS THAT THEY HAVE TO CONTINUE TO WORK AND BALANCE THIS STUFF OUT!
MARCI
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We are going through the same thing with insurance. It should be against the law its like harrassment from these companies who take your money and not want to deliver the goods after. The patient and family have enough to worry about from day-to-day. Its just so sad that we all have to go through this. I feel your anger because I just did a bunch of phone calls yesterday for my mom. I have thought of e-mailing the Attorney General for my state and my state senators if this gets too bad.
Best of Luck!
Marci
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Hi All,
Mom will be starting chemo/radiation 10/1. I have been told Etoposide and Cisplatin is what will be administered. I am wondering if anyone has had these combo's and what side effects they experienced? I am confused why Carbo/Taxol in which I saw on many people's posts isn't being used.
Thanks-
Marci
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Dadstimeon,
Thank you for posting the Chemocare Website- very informative. My mom and I are just starting out on this journey and sometimes you feel like what did they just say? So it helps to see this stuff after and then you can educate yourself. Blessings and Prayers to you and your family.
Marci
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Heather T-
You will triumph again - thinking of you and sending you blessings in Texas.
Marci
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Heather T-
I am so happy it killed your tumor! Congratulations and many more blessing to you.
Marci
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Hi All,
Just posted DX up just wondering anyone w/same DX that can tell me what path they chose for treatment. Does anyone think this 6 weeks of chemo/radiation is the way to go for now?
Marci
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I can't believe how I don't feel so alone anymore on this since I've been on here and its only been 2 days. I feel I can walk this road with my mom b/c others are walking it and not to give up. Will post the dx and stuff - thanks to Ned he gave me instructions on how to post it without rewriting it!
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My name is Marci and my mom/my best friend has just been dx with NSCLC. It seems like a dream to both of us. Praying and hoping endlessly.
I Think It's Time For a Roll Call....
in GENERAL
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Hi All
35yrs old. Married no children yet - stepsons from husband. Younger brother who is only going to be 18. Live in Westchester County, New York. I work as a secretary for a local community college.