Barbb

(((Sue))) Thank you, I know you guys here understand. People who are divorced seem to think they know how it is and what the time line should be but they sure don't. I will never apologize for my grief, nor will I feel bad when someone says something stupid. I will, however, be angry for a few minutes ! Barbb

That's the perfect response, Randy.

My friends don't talk about Rod anymore, the couple-friends we had have deserted me, which is actually ok and most of my friends now never met Rod. You are right about walking 2 miles in our shoes, not 1. If the man says anything like that again, I will have to kindly tell him STOP IT.

Last night at the Wed. night kids dinner that I helped serve, a man who has been through hell with health problems told me, and I paraphrase, to not sit home feeling bad, that time is over. (Well, I don't do that very often) While I respect how much he still does and what a good guy he is, Don't Tell Me When My Grieving Time Is Over. Besides Rod only being gone 4 years, besides my kids not living close enough to run and see when I want to, besides my mom has been gone for 16 years and I still need her, besides living in the country away from lots of people, I have clinical depression that if I don't med at the right time, I spiral down for a day or two. Don't Tell Me How To Feel. Randy, does anyone do that to you? Barbb

Thanks everyone, I will pass on your kind thoughts Eric, the pictures are on Facebook, you are my FB friend so check them out when you have time!!! Barbb

Our daughter married a wonderful man last night. I had posted how emotional it would be when our son walked her down the aisle instead of her dad, but it was truly beautiful. Rod was there. She had a picture and candle on a table at the front to honor him and the pastor mentioned him. He is so happy for them, I just know. Barbb

Judy, I think you are right when you say it will make it all good.

Katie, thank you so much!!!! There are pictures of the surprise proposal on my FB. Zack was generous to include her two best friends, his brother and family and me in the surprise It was WONDERFUL Barb

Thanks, Eric, for the good wishes for the kids. That month won't be so hard to live through any more with new memories to fill it Barbb

You guys make a lot of sense, thanks I'll just take a box of Puff's. I like the idea of the pastor saying something about who is giving this bride. Barbb

I am so happy to tell you my daughter is engaged! They will marry in November and I am worried about breaking down when her brother walks her down the aisle. Maybe it will happen at the rehearsal so I can keep my dignity during the wedding but I ask for your prayers even this far in advance. She is asking the pastor who officiated at Rod's memorial service to do their ceremony because she feels a "tie" with him. I think that is so special. Her best friend wants to honor Rod in someway during the ceremony with a special flower in her bridal bouquet or a special decoration on the chair he would have sat in. I think Michelle is the most thoughtful young lady considering she brought it up Saturday as we celebrated the engagement. Rod met Zack shortly before he died, he really liked him and would be so happy to see how Lacy has changed by loving Zack. We always said it would take someone special... Barbb

Katie, it would be so fun to "laugh til we pee", but I have laughed til I cried and boy does that feel good!

Jean, don't change anything until you know you are ready. My friend came over a month ago and we went through Rod's stuff in the basement. It was so much easier to do it together, if there was something I didn't want to keep, I had her throw it away, the stuff we kept for my son, she put away neatly in the barn. What a blessing she is. Randy, I hope you find a woman a good as Deb to share your life. Barb

If you want to email my "address" is barbb06@gmail.com

Jean, I'm so sorry you are feeling so lost. I saw your post on Facebook and had to come here. I lost my husband 3 years ago. It took 2 1/2 years until I could say I'm glad I'm still alive. If you want the truth, I don't know how life can ever be good again and that's why I quit coming here. I have absolutely no words of encouragement. He suffered so much the last year of life and didn't know he was sick. I see his pictures in the house and my stomach clenches. I think about selling the acreage and moving to town, it's so much to take care of and I don't even work. I'm in my middle 50's and don't believe I could get a job because my "widow's brain" does NOT work like it used to. All I care about is my dog, my fabulous children and their fiance's and my few wonderful friends, and that is why I am still alive. I wish I had good words for you and for me. Prayers for us both. Barbb