JoniRobertWilson Posted November 7, 2004 Posted November 7, 2004 Ok, this sounds pretty pathetic to be so excited about this but, I think I fixed our gutter problem! I was up on a ladder for a couple of hours yesterday removing covers from our covered patio (weird set up) and cleaning them out. It was quite a mess but I was thrilled to be trying. While I was up there working I just kept trying to think about how Robert would be doing it - slowly, methodically, in no hurry and not getting frustrated - and I tried to do it that way. My way is exactly the opposite. Here is the big reason I'm so excited. When I showed my mom what I thought the problem was - she said "you'll need a MAN to fix that". Oh my gosh - that's the wrong thing to sya to me. I had planned on dressing in PINK when I did it but settled on khaki (just kidding folks). I don't know if I ever posted how Robert could fix anything & everything and I feel quite helpless at times. I don't want to hire something done all the time and I'm trying to give my poor family a break! Alex was a big help bringing me the hose, etc. We were quite a team. I missed Robert terribly yesterday but I really do think he was proud of us. Thanks for listening to this minor milestone! Quote
glo Posted November 7, 2004 Posted November 7, 2004 I love it, Joni! You go, girl! I understand EXACTLY how that feels. It's empowering! My husband was a general contractor and he did everything around the house. Could have built a house if he wanted to. I'm not used to having to take off work and wait for some repairman, let alone knowing which ones aren't trying to rip you off. I've managed to fix quite a few things at the house over this past year. And every time it feels so good. Not so much because of saving money, but more because it's avoiding the dependency on others. I did just have my gutters cleaned by someone else -- but only because a friend of my daughter is trying to get his gutter cleaning business off the ground. And he traded the charge to her because he had borrowed her car in the past. I did pay a guy to come out and repair the deadbolt lock on the front door because that's a safety issue and I knew what it involved, (chiseling out the hole for the strike plate a little bigger and moving it up or down a little). He was competent and his price was fair -- but his attitude made me want to chew nails. He kept calling me "little lady" and lecturing me on stuff I already knew. Ugh. Then he ran his hand across the top of the door and said "just as I thought -- it's never been painted -- moisture can get in there and make the door swell." My response: "Oh, it's been painted -- many times. I'm not tall enough to see or reach up there, so I well remember each time I've gotten out the ladder to paint that door myself." I've always liked to paint. Hang in there, Joni -- there are lots of things you don't know you can do, because you haven't had reason to try it. And guys, we're not male bashing. The same thing would apply to any woman who treated people with that condescending attitude. Joni didn't mention this part -- evidently she just hates to be told she can't do something. Which I also understand. Joni, you sound so much more together and way less desparate than you did right after Robert's death. I know it's still awfully hard and know you probably fall back in the pit of despair regularly, but just wanted you to know that I'm very proud of your progress. We'll all make it -- it just takes a lot of time. Quote
kimblanchard Posted November 7, 2004 Posted November 7, 2004 You think you are lame? Back in April I posted about how proud I was to have changed the clock in the car to the correct time. Before then, I would just drive around until it drove Becky nuts enough that she would fix it. (She didn't spend much time in my car; hers was the nicer and thus the family car.) So if you think cleaning the gutters is a little achievement, it is much bigger than mine. Speaking of which, I need to go ahead and fall back in the car. Curtis Quote
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