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4th of July!!!!

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Well, with this being just another one of the "Firsts" that are coming up I wanted to share with everyone just how nice the 4th of July was for my family.

This was the first time since my dad died that everyone was NOT walking around on egg shells, particularly around me. I think that is probably because I was the first one to just talk about him. It was so nice to hear my family laughing while we were remembering. You could still see the pain of the loss that was on our faces but the memories not being forgotten felt great!

We are still trying to get through one day at a time but it is nice to feel like a family again instead of having this dark cloud hanging over our heads. And even the grandkids acted more like they used to. I'm sure that they are picking up on a lot of more of our emotions than what we think, you really can't get things past kids, they are a lot smarter than we give them credit for at times.

Anyway, just wanted to share a happy story for once. Thought that you would all enjoy this one....hopefully the next 1st will be easier too. Still dreading Thanksgiving and Christmas! Ugg!!! But we can do this right???? Until later then!


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Mary, I am so glad that your family was able to share some heartfelt smiles and happy memories of your Dad. Every good memory, regardless of how unimportant it may have seemed at the time, is a good thing to hold on to now. Yes, holidays and special occasions are definitely the pits. Some are harder to get through than others but time does help to make it less painful. You know, it's so funny how even the samllest memories can come back so strong after losing someone. This year, Dennis and I would have celebrated our 27th wedding anniversary. Just a few nights ago, while on the treadmill, listening to music, the song "You Had Me From Hello" played. Almost immediately, an image of Dennis's cute smile flashed into my head. As I listened to the words, I realized they were completely fitting for the first time I met him. I replayed the entire meeting back in my mind and now do so every time I hear the song. Now, I don't cry when I think of this but instead I smile, realizing how very lucky I was to have been in love with this wonderful man for so many years....but not long enough! Wishing you many happy memories!!!

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Mary, I'm so glad you were able to have a great day filled with such rich memories. Of all people, on the 4th, my mother-in-law brought up how much she missed my mom. She remembered the last 4th that my mom and dad were down and how she played water gun fight with my boys (they were 2 and 4 at the time). She told me how she admired my mom's zest for life, that she could see how much she loved her grandchildren. At that moment, I was proud she was my mom. I was so lucky to have her as long as I did. Memories can be hard to deal with at times, but they just recomfirm the love that we shared with our loved ones. I hope the holidays get better with each passing one. My next hard one will be my son Nicolas' 7th birthday. He was really close to his "Grandma Net". Mom was the "play with me" kind of grandma, and Nicolas and Connor miss that so much.

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