Intro.

[emma1leah]

Just wanted to take a minute to introduce myself. My father was diagnosed just before Christmas with nsclc. This happened after a couple of months of different tests to determine why he was losing so much weight. He said all along that he had cancer, but no one wanted to believe him. We found out that surgery was not an option at the beginning of the month and he began radiation this past week. He will begin recieving chemo and internal radiation this week. This is probably the worst thing I can imagine having to go through with the exception of anything happening to my daughter. I try so hard to be positive, but find myself fighting tears several times a day. This site seems really nice because others are going through the same feelings and emotions, whereas most of the people in my life either avoid the issue, or act like there is no hope.

[Cindy RN]

I have been in your shoes. In 1994 my mom died, she was my best friend. She lived 1 1/2 yrs after her dx of nsclc with brain mets. Being a caregiver was more difficult for me than being the one with the cancer. You have watch everything and feel helpless. Just do what YOU can do for him and let him Know how you feel about him. Lots of prayer!! There people out here to help you vent and pray for you and your dad.

[Debaroo]

Last January when my dad was diagnosed (extensive NSCLC) All I could think of was that my two daughters wouldn't remember their "Poppy", and how much I wanted them to have him around as I STILL have my 85 year old grandfather around. But that was a year ago. I have learned to try to take things day by day, and keep up on his condition so that we could nip any further metastis' in the bud. And I always make sure to hug him alot and let my kids see him as much as possible (assuming they're not sick, because during chemo his resistance to infection was really low). I am sorry that you have to go through this, and I know what you mean about friends not being comforable bringing up your dads condition. They probably are just afraid to upset you. Having this board to turn to has been a true Godsend. I have not only gained alot of insight into Dads disease, but have found alot of comfort and HOPE on this board. I hope you find the same. You will be added in my prayers. Take care, Deb

[Guest randi817]

I, too, understand what you're going through... My dad was diagnosed (age 54) with adenocarcinoma (IIIa) back in September (02). The whole process has been of course quite trying and difficult, but it does, at some point, become more "normal" too - i.e. you find a way to live your life, with your children and family and work and whatever while also caring for and about your dad. My father underwent surgery - had a staph infection from the surgery - and finally began chemo in November... we just got our first ct scan back and thank goodness, the tumor is shrinking.

I understand, too, what you mean about friends' and family's reaction... these groups are very helpful because people understand what you're going through and have a more informed reaction. When they seem interested, I try to give my friends and family as much information as possible, to help them understand things from my perspective.

And yes, taking things day by day is the answer to this. I keep thinking when I allow myself to get down that my father will never see his grandchildren (since my husband and I haven't had any kids yet). But then I stop myself, and think about the fact that TODAY my dad is feeling well - and was able to go see a broadway show. Or tomorrow he's going to go to work, just as he does any other day. That's the better way - and more mangeable way - to think about it, i think.