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More Maxineisms ......LOL


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Maxine on Patriotism: If you MUST burn the flag, please wrap yourself in it first.

Maxine on Driver Safety: I can't use the cell phone in the car, I have to keep my hands free for making gestures.

Maxine on Housework: I do my housework in the nude. It gives me an incentive to clean the mirrors as quickly as possible.

Maxine on Lawn Care: The key to a nice-looking lawn is a good mower. I recommend one who is muscular and shirtless.

Maxine on The Perfect Man: All I'm looking for is a guy who'll do what I want, when I want, for as long as I want, and then go away. Or wait nearby,like a Dust Buster, charged up and ready when needed.

Maxine on Technology: My idea of rebooting is kicking somebody in the butt twice.

Maxine on Aging: Take every birthday with a grain of salt. This works much better if the salt accompanies a Margarita.

Maxine on Middle Age: The only two things we do with greater frequency in middle age are urinating and attend funerals.

Maxine on Todays Cars: The trouble with bucket seats is that not everybody has the same size bucket.

Maxine on Todays Fads: Do you realize that in about 40 years, we'll have millions of old ladies running around with sagging tattoos and droopy pierced navels.

Maxine on Happiness: Money can't buy happiness----but somehow it's more comfortable to cry in a Porsche than a Kia.

Maxine on Tomorrow: After a certain age, if you don't wake up aching somewhere....you may be dead.

I'm thinking, maybe we should elect Maxine for President.

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