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Dumb hick?


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Johnny Cochran was duck hunting in Montana recently, and shot a duck that fell into a field on the other side of a fence. As he climbed over the fence, a farmer suddenly pulled up in his pickup truck, jumped out, and asked Mr. Cochran what he was doing on his property.

"Retrieving the duck that I just shot," Cochran replied.

"That duck is on my side of the fence, so now it's mine," replied the farmer.

Mr. Cochran asked the farmer if he recognized who he was talking to.

"No," replied the farmer, "I don't know, and I don't care. The duck is mine."

"I am Johnny Cochran, famous lawyer from Los Angeles," came the reply. "I am the lawyer that got O.J. Simpson off. I'm the reason he is a free man today. And if you don't let me get that duck, I'll sue you for your farm, your truck, and everything you own. I'll leave you penniless on the street."

"Well," said the farmer, "In Montana the only law we use for small disagreements like this is the 'Three Kicks Law'."

"Never heard of it," said Johnny.

The farmer said, "I get to kick you 3 times, and you kick me back 3 times. We keep this up until someone gives up. Whoever wins today, gets the duck."

Cochran thought this over. He grew up in a tough neighborhood and figured he could take this old farmer and teach him a lesson at the same time. "Fair enough," he said.

The farmer's first kick planted the toe of his heavy work boot into the lawyer's groin and dropped him to his knees. His second kick nearly wiped the man's nose off his face. The barrister was flat on his belly when the farmer's third kick to a kidney nearly caused him to lose consciousness. Cochran summoned every bit of his will, managed to get to his feet, and said, "Okay, you old coot, now it's my turn."

"Aw, forget it," said the farmer, walking away. "You win. You can have the duck."

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