recce101 Posted January 1, 2010 Share Posted January 1, 2010 When I woke up this morning I found my in-basket filled with the raw materials for the Lions Club bulletin I need to put together for next week's meeting. Can't resist passing some of these on: Did you hear about Tiger’s last outing? He drove into a tree and ended up with a bad lie. What’s the difference between a car and a golf ball? Tiger can drive a golf ball 350 yards. Did you make it out of your driveway this morning? Then you can say that you outdrove Tiger Woods. Some of the others are not quite so PC. Aloha, Ned Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ginnyde Posted January 2, 2010 Share Posted January 2, 2010 Blonde jokes will be replaced by Tiger jokes. Twas the night of Thanksgiving and out of the house Tiger Woods came a flyin', chased by his spouse. She wielded a nine iron and wasn't too merry, Cause a bimbo’s phone number was in his Blackberry. He’d been cheatin' on Elin, and the story progressed. Woman after woman stepped up and confessed. He’d been cheatin’ with Holly, and Jaimee, and Cori, With Joselyn, and Kalika. The world had the story. From the top of the Tour to the basement of blues, Tiger’s sad sordid tale was all over the news. With hostesses, waitresses, he had lots of sex, When not in their pants, he was sendin' them texts. Despite all his cryin’ and beggin' and pleadin', Tiger’s wife went investin' -- a new home in Sweden . And I heard her exclaim from her white Escalade, "If you’re gettin' laid then I’m gettin' paid." She’s not pouting, in fact, she is of jolly good cheer, Her prenup made Christmas come early this year. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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