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Dead Duck


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A woman brought a very limp duck into a veterinary surgeon

As she lay her pet on the table, the vet pulled out his stethoscope and

listened to the bird's chest. After a moment or two, the vet shook his

head sadly and said, "I'm so sorry, your pet has passed away."

The distressed owner wailed, "Are you sure? "Yes, I'm sure. The duck is

dead," he replied. "How can you be so sure", she protested. "I mean,

you haven't done any testing on him or anything. He might just be in a coma

or something."

The vet rolled his eyes, turned around and left the room. He returned a

few moments later with a black Labrador Retriever. As the duck's owner

looked on in amazement, the dog stood on his hind legs, put his front paws

on the examination table and sniffed the duck from top to bottom.

He then looked at the vet with sad eyes and shook his head. The vet patted

the dog and took it out and returned a few moments later with a beautiful

cat. The cat jumped up on the table and also sniffed the bird from its

beak to its tail and back again. The cat sat back on its haunches, shook

its head, meowed softly, jumped down and strolled out of the room.

The vet looked at the woman and said, "I'm sorry, but as I said, this is

most definitely, 100% certifiably, a dead duck." Then the vet turned to his

computer terminal, hit a few keys, and produced a bill, which he handed to

the woman.

The duck's owner, still in shock, took the bill. "$150!" she cried.

"$150 just to tell me my duck is dead?!!"

The vet shrugged. "I'm sorry. If you'd taken my word for it, the bill

would have been $20. But with the Lab Report and the Cat Scan, it all

adds up."

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