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Hi Helpingmom, I feel your pain! I am relieved that my mother quit smoking prior to her lung cancer diagnosis, but it was a big challenge for her. It has been an even bigger challenge for my father. He has attempted to quit over 20 times. Finally, he hasn't smoked in a little over a year (that we know of!) but only because he is disabled and it is too challenging to get himself outside to smoke and hold still long enough to light the cigarette (he has a neurological disorder that causes him to shake). All that being said, addiction to nicotine is tough for many to overcome. It is different from illicit drug addictions because the products are readily available and it has less stigma attached to it than someone who is using illicit drugs. Please be patient with your mom. The lies come with the addiction. The justification and ignoring other issues that are related to smoking comes with addiction as well. I finally decided that I was going to stop confronting my dad every time I knew he was smoking. All it would do is lead to more lies and more frustration on my part. Although he has not been diagnosed with cancer, so every puff he takes does not possibly make his health worse, as with your mom, it's still dangerous for him to sneak out of the house to smoke. Perhaps having one last discussion with your mom to let your know all of your thoughts and feelings about her smoking could help you to feel you've made every attempt to help. And then think about leaving the issue alone. After all, the stress of dealing with a cancer diagnosis would be enough to drive many non-smokers to smoke! On another note, if your mom is ever ready to quit, my dad had good luck with Chantix. He now takes a reasonable dose of Wellbutrin which I guess helps with the urge to smoke.

Thanks for the advice! Good thing my mom has green card so coming to US is not an issue. Thinking about buying individual policy, but with the volatile individual market it is not sure if Houston will still have a marketplace next year.I know it is annual enrollment so I need to wait until the end of year to enroll for next year. It will be a problem if preexisting condition is part of the underwriting process. So much uncertainty with the regulations on healthcare market. It is literally life or death for some patients with some potential changes. Very sad but it is a reality.

Emily, Waiting for scans, then results, then consults, always waiting with a deep foreboding, that kind of sums up my entire treatment experience. As a community, we call this symptom scanxiety. I call it Scanziety and wrote a book about it. I liked the photos you posted by the way. So where do we start. We have a lot in common. I grew up in the suburbs of Philly, sailed a lot in my younger days, suffered a lung cancer diagnosis, had Carboplatin (18 times) as one of my chemo pairings, and achieved a NED (no evidence of disease) state after a CyberKnife radiation procedure. And I'm alive, and I say most emphatically, if I can live, so can you. Words of wisdom? Stay in the day; look for a little piece of joy everyday, and then revel in it. Tomorrow will take care of itself and will happen on its own accord. You have no ability to control tomorrow, or any outcome for that matter, so why try? You don't need to make decisions about the future today. You may tomorrow or next week, or next month, or never. So on the day required, make the decision then quickly go back to joy. I decided I wasn't going to let lung cancer take over my life. I found I had the power to make and abide by that decision. Stay the course. Tom