Andrea

Nat, I have no right to reply to your posting b/c I have not yet gone through what you are going through. But I want to tell you that I think you are amazing and doing so well. Oftentimes now I talk to my mom, call her for anything, I think to myself what am I going to do when she is gone. Who will I confide to? Who will I gossip with? Who can I share "mean" or "bitchy" thoughts with that are not nice? Brian said I can share them with him. So I gave it a test. I was like "can you believe what ____ was wearing? it was so inapprorpiate" and just going on about general gossip of the evening events. Well guys don't care about that, they think it is mean to be critical and I was really just sharing private thoughts that I would normally only share with my mom. There are so many things I would only tell my mom and the thought of her leaving me brings me to the point of hysterics. I wished you and I lived closer Nat, even though we both have lots of friends, there is something about being an only child who is close to your mom that you can relate to. As for your dad, he is going through a lot too. My mom told me last nuight when I was really cranky with my dad about his concerns on the walk that I should not be so hard on him b/c he is dealing with this on a daily basis and it just is not easy. Your dad is probably grieving in his own way. And I am sure you are angry. And I bet it might make you sad when you see happy families. This is all understandable. Again, I KNOW how lucky I am and I feel guity about posting about something I have yet to experience, but I just wanted to say a few things. Nat, you are my hero. I admire you. Please promise me that you will save at least two bracelets for me to buy so that my mom and I can proudly wear them daily and think of you.

You are 100% right Heather. I had that experience, in law school i was misdiagnosed with "stress, overweight" and put on antidepressants and was told that 40% of law students are on them. I was also told I was "crazy". Well I wasn't, I really did have a kideny infection and kidney stone which was misdiagnosed for a few months and made me pretty sick. My trick is that if I want a test and they won't do it, I say "please mark in my chart that you refused me a abdominal ct scan". That is how I finally got scanned and diagnosed when I was in the ER in such pain in lawschool, my dad said that to the dr Next thing you k now, zooom, there i went This particular dr though is very "neurotic" himself. Some say a bit too neurotic and probably not the best for me. But I like being tested I was sooooo high strung pre-cancer about work, I went there with chest pains and I was sent off for a stress test. This was 6 months ago. Two years ago I had the slightest bleeding, which we all apparently get, but to be thorough he sent me to the gastro and I had a colonoscopy. It was just hemroids I saw one drop of blood and panicked. He had me get a brain ct scan for my headaches even though he felt they were "nothing". He is insistent on yearly stool tests for everyone, even though I am only 31. And I get yearly ultrasounds b/c my grandmother had ovarian cancer at age 82. I asked about mamograms and he said I am too young and it would not show enough, but if it makes me feel better I can come in every 6 months for a breast exam I am not sure if it is b/c he practices defensive medicine, or he himself is neurotic, or what. But I like it, I bet I can squeeze a chest CT scan out of him in another year! I had one Dec 2002 b/c there was an infiltrate on the lung shown on an abdominal ct scan for gallstones and it turned out to be nothing, so Dec 2004 sounds good to me for another chest scan

Thank you, that was the exact link I was talking about. We could make a flyer with that as our opener and make sure that each person who wants to participate has their picture on there so it tugs on the hearts of people who know them to open their wallets even more

I am going for my physical on Fri and have an irriational fear that the dr will feel a lump somewhere. I have known allergies, take allergy shots, feel the post nasal drip, yet wonder if my slight cough is lung cancer. We have had ongoing discussions where I know I am not the only mental one, and that I am quite normal. However, outsiders may not think we are normal. I really do hate to use the term feeling mental or bipolar b/c those are REAL diseases and I don't want to demean them. Any ideas for a name of our mental status that we can use to tell doctors? When Dr. Kim says "and Andrea, how have you been?", I will tell him that I have on and off heart fluttering, i have a mild cough, i have frequent migraines, I feel for lumps and bumps and he better do a thorough exam. However, I am also going to have to explain that I suffer from _____, and ____ is the mystery. I was thinking "I am a cancer worry wart", "I suffer from cancerpolar disorder", or " I am suffering from canceritis"

Yes, that was the name of one of them! Aneoploid To be honest, I was banned from looking up what the tests meant by my husband b/c I can go overboard, so he looked and told me it really is just a test for what the tumor is made up of and how best to keep maintaining and treatments, etc. There have been threats of a "parental" lock on cancer websites if I don't behave

What could be done is that we come up with a standard letter/flyer/whatever to send out. ALL money would be sent DIRECTLY to Katie and Rick at LCSC or if we collect checks, they would be payable to LCSC so we don't have to worry about issues of each person accounting, or issues of anyone keeping funds, etc. Now let's say that there are 30 people who want to participate. Each person uses the standard mailing and it will all be mailed from one location for uniformity. But enclosed with that, for each's person's address list, will be a personalized letter (personalized meanign telling your story, how you got involved and signed love, Nat or love Andrea, etc)from the person so those who receive it kind of know who it is from. If people feel more of a connection, they give more. Then we do Count Your Blessings and ask for money based on cute things like how many healthy children, etc. We come up with about 30 things. HOWEVER, we also say they don't have to send that much if unable and we would count our blessings if they give a minimum of $10. All the money goes to LCSC. There can be a list kept for who gives money so we can know who to thank. And then we can ahve a raffle. Does this make sense? My mom gave an enthusiatic, now that sounds great to this plan My secretary also thinks this could be helping people on a different level with awareness in the mailing.

You are right Nat, I am now thinking about what I can do on a smaller scale leading up. About the bracelets, I want to buy a bunch I hope they are sold here. You are the best!

My mother in law said i could steal her idea. There can be a cute way to do a mailing with the cover letter. We could tell people to count their blessings and donate for lung cancer and like have a sheet with things such as: $10 for each healthy child you have 50 cents for each tv in your house $5 for each vacation you take a year and if you add like 30 things, we could get anywhere from $10 up to $100 for each flyer what do you think?

A ZILLION THANK YOU TO EVERYONE FOR THE SUPPORT!!!!!!!!!! I was sooooo upset last night b/c I did not want to let anyone down, I care so much for people here. My husband commented that I am getting too emotionally attached b/c I cry each time I read bad news. I said no, not getting attached, already AM! I posted a smaller idea under LC Activism which is really a feasible realistic idea to start out with. Let meknow what you think. And in a year or so when we become bigger, then I can organize the huge walk/rally I have envisioned. I was even contemplating a petting zoo for kids I get a lot of enjoyment trying to think of ideas how to raise money and create awareness. I now realize I have to keep the "grand" ideas on teh back burner and first start with the smaller ones to network, get exposure, etc.

We saw the radiation oncologist yest. The medical oncologist did a bunch of testing on the tumor like DNA Palidoy and Proliferative analysis, which I do not know yet what it means, I find out April 7 when we see him, but I did see it said "outcome unfavorable". I asked radiation oncologist if that is significant to us. He said no, it just means it was a nasty tumor. Anyway, he was REALLY great, we loved him. He indicated that the medical oncologist was the capitan and he defers to him which is nice to have doctors working together. We asked him, what are my mom's chances considering where she is at now. His answer was honest and I found it interesting. He said well IIIA as I am sure you know has bad odds, but those statistics were done at a time when they did not take a 3 prong approach and do chemo, surgery, then radiation. And at a time without the new promising clinical trials and Iressa. So basically he said my mom and others like her will be the new statistics, they are guinea pigs and only time will tell. Since these treatments are so new, it cannot be compared to 5 years ago. I found his viewpoint interesting. I said a guinea pig is fine, I find pigs cute and I love Ms. Piggy My mom is pretty like Ms. Piggy!

Yeah Fay, I like your thinking. On the way into work, I equated in my head to selling girl scout cookies. I wonder if Katie and Rick would think this is a good idea---a "pamphlet" on awareness which talks about awareness issues, blah blah, can be prepared. In that small package (I am talking just like a few pieces of paper on early detection and that kind of stuff for awareness), the front page has a picture of everyone who wants to participate in the fundraiser with the saying "what do we all have in common". I am talking along the lines of that WONDERFUL design idea someone posted and I cannot remember who it was gosh darn it. Those interested mail them out and hand them out to as many people as they can. It can also be something that is left out in the workplace like when kids sell cookies. We can say something like a minimum donation of $10 enters you into a drawing. Hopefully those who can will give more. I already have some prizes. If this idea is OKd I would also work really hard to see if maybe I can secure a "grand prize", like a weekend somewhere or we could even make the grandprize a $200 gift certificatre to Macys or something like that. It is an EASY way to spread awareness while raising funds for this amazing website.

My mother in law suggested this. She has lots of ideas she said, we just have not talked yest, she was talking to Brian, but this was passed along..........She is so worried about me and the walk, she is now coming up with other thngs.....She has fundraised for years. I will get more ideas from her if you';d like. If all of us (meaning whomever wants to) compiles a list of addresses and we put it together, we can do a mailer across the US with a flyer, maybe something with our pictures on it so people we know can recognize each of us, like that website page someoe deisgned awhile back. and ask people to send in money. We can do something cute like "If you live in an apt, please send $5", "If you live in a house, please send $10", etc. We can also say that each person who sends in money will automatically be eligible for a prize drawing. I have from my wedding a beautiful Mikasa vase that I would be willing to give away as a prize (i received so many vases and it does not match my colors) and a red 3 piece luggage set and a good brand new in the box blender. Just a thought.

Karen, I will talk to you later, I am off to work, but I like your idea. I was thinking of maybe something smaller like a luncheon where it is more controlled.....we will talk soon.

John, Good samaritan laws do not apply. I wish they did. This world is so litigious it is crazy. As for the people voicing concerns---my parents. They would do what they can, but right now my mom is still undergoing treatment and it is a huge day and accomplishment if she can go to the store or go get her haircut. My dad is her caretaker. My inlaws--my mother in law is Sisterhood Temple President; she is on the board of Children';s Hospital, and she works part time as a travel agent. She would do all she can, but she cannot do enough, nor would I ask her. She needs to take care of herself. She has Chron's and is a cancer survivor, complete with an oscetomy puch and all. She is sooo worried about me doing this alone that she told my mom she would give me $1000 if I didn't. (Of course I am not taking the money, but it showed how strongly she felt) My husband--of course he will help. I had a discussion with a lot of my friends last night and bottom line is that I can organize and head up a walk. However, I cannot do it alone and without having people I can delegate tasks to. So Cal is a large area, it is a great venue for an event. But as much as I would likeit to be, I now realize from listening to thse who love me that tt cannot be the "Andrea" walk to benefit LCSC. It has to be either an organization fully behind me with help. Or I have to take smaller steps and volunteer to do other work to learn more. I have to worry about myself I was up all night about this.

Thank you Cheryl. And thank you Karen and Snowflake for making me feel better. The issue is not the cost of the insurance, I can out of pocket whatever I need to, the issue is the liability behind it b/c you can still easily get sued with insurance and I would be the one they sue if it is in my name Sometimes it is bad to come from a family that worked for insurance companies, it makes you afraid to do things. And I guess everyone is right, I can't do it alone without firm help. If it does not happen this year, I will contact local cancer groups, make connections, and still do fundraising on a smaller scale. I so badly wanted to make a difference.

This is a double post from General in case people don't see it there. I hope this message does not anger or upset anyone. My heart truly is here. I WANT to fundraise for this website. I WANT to help people and make a difference. However, my family is the most important thing to me and because of their concerns (possibly legitimate, I am not sure) I will be unable to organize and head up the So Cal Walk unless 1) I get a firm committee of people willing to take on certain tasks (flyers, making calls to sponsors, raffle tickets, food, etc, etc) AND 2)the insurance is not taken out solely by me. I can't do it unless the insurance is in a few names or an organization name. Basically it cannot be all on my shoulders, I have to share the event and not have it just be "Andrea" doing it. My husband, inlaws, and parents all feel strongly about this. (My parents both worked in insurance law, and hence are more sensitive to the responsibility of this kind of thing) If this is not possible, and I understand that people are busy and it is a big undertaking to sign up for, then I will DEFINATELY still do some sort of fundraising effort, I just cannot head up the walk. I truly hope you understand and are not disappointed me. I don't know what to say. I never did anything like this, I had tons of ideas, I want to do it, but I guess I can understand my family's viewpoint and my family comes first.

I hope this message does not anger or upset anyone. My heart truly is here. I WANT to fundraise for this website. I WANT to help people and make a difference. However, my family is the most important thing to me and because of their concerns (possibly legitimate, I am not sure) I will be unable to organize and head up the So Cal Walk unless 1) I get a firm committee of people willing to take on certain tasks (flyers, making calls to sponsors, raffle tickets, food, etc, etc) AND 2)the insurance is not taken out solely by me. I can't do it unless the insurance is in a few names or an organization name. Basically it cannot be all on my shoulders, I have to share the event and not have it just be "Andrea" doing it. My husband, inlaws, and parents all feel strongly about this. (My parents both worked in insurance law, and hence are more sensitive to the responsibility of this kind of thing) If this is not possible, and I understand that people are busy and it is a big undertaking to sign up for, then I will DEFINATELY still do some sort of fundraising effort, I just cannot head up the walk. I truly hope you understand and are not disappointed me. I don't know what to say. I never did anything like this, I had tons of ideas, I want to do it, but I guess I can understand my family's viewpoint and my family comes first.

This is about the So Cal Walk I received a joint phone call from my parents and my inlaws voicing their concerns and I am going to be honest about what they said and see if anyone wants to be on a committe or what you think or ideas, etc. The concerns are as follows: 1. I have no fundraising experience 2. I work full time as an attorney and my time is limited. 3. I get stressed easy. 4. Because I want to do this to raise money for and on behalf of LCSC, I have to take out my own insurance and hence risk all liability personally; rather than having a larger organization with insurance such as American Cancer Society or ALCASE behind. They are concerned that without a committe of people to help with flyers, obtain raffle prizes, getting food, getting sponsors, making into a successful event, etc, that I cannot possibly do it alone and can't do it withut a team. Apparently my husband's colitis attack was most likely prompted by stress, which equates to me and my obsession with this disease. My parenets and inlaw suggest that I fundraise or do something in a different way, OR get a committee behind me so this is all not on my shoulders b/c they don't think I can handle it all alone. I am in tears right now. I really don't know what to do. I was sooooooo excited about finding a venue, making contacts, I want to fundraise. In a way I see their point about the risk, if I takeout insurance myself for the event and anyone gets hurt, it is my butt. Can someone please help me or give me suggestions? I got into a big fight with my parents about this b/c I was so upset that they are bringing this up now and they were upset I would not listen to their concerns, and then they made Brian get on the phone and Brian said I cannot do this alone, I can do it with others. Brian's mom was in charge of f undraising for Children's Hospital a few years ago and is now President of the Temple Sisterhood and she says I have no idea how much work is involved in sometjing like this and how it just cannot be done by me, especially b/c I work 50-60 hours a week. What is a solution? HELP. I mean yeah I can get raffles going and all of that to raise money, but that is not enough Then I was thinking not a walk, maybe just a luncheon type of thing to raise funds where liability is less and I can have raffles and it is not as big of an ordeal?????? Oy Please don't hate me that my parents voiced their opinion

I am going to the park tomorrow at 7:30am. It is a HUGE beautiful park with like 18 shelters. The largest shelter holds 250. Well my concern is what if more than that come. I don't expect it now, but who knows. They will rent me another shelter right next door. Logically, it is a public park, so anyone can be there. However the nut job in me says what if more people show up and they start counting, then I will get in trouble. SO, here is the newest brainstorm---I rent both shelters. Shetlers are basically picnic table areas. I make the smaller area the "Kids Zone" where the bounce house is and stuff for kids, so kids running around don't annoy others. This way I cover my butt. I think for $190 I might as well do it, it is the "safer" route to go I already have $400 in sponsor money from my uncle who sells on EBAY and my office is going to give me a co uple hundred for sure. And I have not started to hit others yet, so I think it will be ok Does this sound like a good idea?

I see, I see, people want to come to my walk, but really you just want an excuse to come to California And who can blame you to escape winter. Heeheeheeheehee. You can visit Disneyland while you are here and do so many things. I vacationed in California my entire life, from age 13 on until I moved here in 1998 Denise--I am staring at your picture to see if I recognize you. Denise and I went to the same college, 1 year apart and lived in the same dorm

Thanks to everyone on the insurance info I really was jsut going on what my mother in law told me and she does have a tendency to exaggerate I will be makign calls tomorrow. Monday--could not call, fear it would jinx colonoscopy today for brian and radiation oncologist appt for my mom Tuesday, today--6am at Hoag hospital for Brian's test; drop Brian home at 9am; off to work; 12:30 off for long radiation oncologist consult; 3:30 back to work It just sucks when work gets in the way of my personal life :)

Thanks for the advice Dave! I need to call around. I was basing figures on what my mother in law told me. She is very active at Children's Hospital in LA and was on the board for awhile and she recalls an event where it cost thousands for insurance and it really made no sense to me, but immediately my mind went to Plan B options

I got the venue! I got the venue! I go on Wed at 7:30am to pay. It is Laguna Niguel Park go to www.ocparks.com and search for Laguna Niguel. It is gorgeous!!!!!!!!!!!! The walk is Sunday Nov 7, same weekend as the other walk The large picnic shelter holds 250 people. The ranger is making an excpetion and allowing low level ampliphying sound. The other location which sat 400 was soooooo hilly, I could barely walk to the area!! This has ample parking and close bathrooms and the park is great. I have one concern--INSURANCE. I didn't want to call around today b/c I am nervous for my husband's colonoscopy tomorrow and my mom's radiation oncologist consult tomorrow, so I will call Wed. If the difference in insurance between like a picnic and a walk is over $1000, I will just make it a Lung Cancer Rally or picnic or something. I am going to have a bounce house for kids to attract people and food so it will accomodate those who just want to get together adn those who want to walk. The only advantage of the walk is a walk could get more publicity.

I got the venue! I got the venue! I go on Wed at 7:30am to pay. It is Laguna Niguel Park go to www.ocparks.com and search for Laguna Niguel. It is gorgeous!!!!!!!!!!!! The walk is Sunday Nov 7, same weekend as the other walk The large picnic shelter holds 250 people. The ranger is making an excpetion and allowing low level ampliphying sound. The other location which sat 400 was soooooo hilly, I could barely walk to the area!! This has ample parking and close bathrooms and the park is great. I have one concern--INSURANCE. I didn't want to call around today b/c I am nervous for my husband's colonoscopy tomorrow and my mom's radiation oncologist consult tomorrow, so I will call Wed. If the difference in insurance between like a picnic and a walk is over $1000, I will just make it a Lung Cancer Rally or picnic or something. I am going to have a bounce house for kids to attract people and food so it will accomodate those who just want to get together adn those who want to walk. The only advantage of the walk is a walk could get more publicity.

My mom had either one or two transfusions. It did not hurt at all, she just laid down for awhile when they did it and the only side effect was she had more energy