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Suitable Clothes


Frank Lamb

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The lookout aboard a clipper ship spots a pirate ship approaching, and yells down to the captain. The captain orders the bosun to bring his red shirt. The captain puts on his red shirt, and successfully leads his crew in fighting off the pirates. The next day, the lookout spots TWO pirate ships approaching. He yells to the captain, who again orders the bosun to bring his red shirt. The captain again wears the red shirt as they successfully repel the pirates. After the battle the bosun asks, "Captain, why do you always wear the red shirt in battle?" The captain replies, "Because, if I am wounded, the crew will not see the blood and lose their courage." The next day the lookout spots SIX pirate ships approaching and yells to the captain. Anticipating the order, the bosun immediately brings the red shirt. "To heck with that!" says the captain. "Bring me my brown pants!"

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