this week...

[Barbb]

This week was "different" and I don't understand how I feel, our daughter, Lacy age 28, and I loaded the pickup 3 times with scrap metal to sell. We were glad it was the "pack rat" stuff that we never saw Rod using so it wasn't so painful. While we did this work and drove the 40 mile round trip three times to the scrap metal buyer she talked about her dad, how she felt and what her fears were. I told her he said he didn't want to die but he didn't want to live with the terrible pain he endured. That helped her. Other things I had told her she hadn't absorbed in her grief so there was some comfort for her this week.

Last night and today I put up some pleated blinds in three windows... finally privacy Rod gave me such a gift, he showed me how to do things and how to use the tools. I did break a drill bit, but the next size down worked. He let me struggle with putting up some curtains a couple years ago. He said he thought about helping me but I needed to feel confident. Today, it feels like he knew something. I hope not.

To all of us hurting and so lonely for our loved ones, may we find more peaceful moments this next week.

Barb

[Patti B]

(((((Barb)))))

I wish you many peaceful moments this week, and all the weeks to come.

Hugs - Patti B.

[teriw]

((((Barb))))

I understand what you're saying. There is empowerment in doing these things. It's the "survival" aspect I think, and the knowledge that our husbands would be proud that we're "taking the bull by the horn," so to speak. There is a strength that comes when you do these things -- I find it so. Bless Rod for thinking of you and wanting that for you even before you needed it.

You are making it through and you will continue to get stronger. I'm so pleased for you and your daughter that you were able to share that special time together.