New member (relative)

[matmirror]

I am a new member. My mom has been diagnosed with lung cancer. She is very sad, depressed. It is hard to be around her, she has not started any treatment yet. We are waiting for Ins. to approve for this expensive oral medication to be taken once a day. I would like to know what others have done when the cancer patient is very down and refuses any antidepressant. Thank you.

Matilde

[eric byrne]

Hi Matilde,

Welcome to LCSC,sorry to hear about your mothers dx and of her feeling depressed.Lung Cancer conjures up such a frightening picture when a diagnosis is first announced,this takes me back over 4 years ago,my reaction was much the same as your mothers,it was the feeling of being robbed of a future,there would for the rest of my life be a dark cloud hanging over me,threatening my final demise.My sleep patterns were so disrupted I could'nt get a good nights sleep.I soldiered on,but eventually good sense prevailed, I visited my GP,he prescribed sleeping pills and an anti-depressent,neither were addictive and after only a short period of time my crisis passed,my jangled nerves began to settle.I began to believe,maybe just maybe, I can survive this disease.Time is a wonderful healer,the first step in my road to recovery was discovering LUNGevity and LCSC,this was quite by accident,I was online looking for positive stories about people dxd with LC that had become long term survivors.I began to post in regularly to this site,each morning I used to wake up,my thoughts used to be,I have lung cancer and its going to kill me and in the not so distant future,now this thought was overtaken by another,I wonder if there has been any replies in LCSC to my post yesterday in the "Just for Fun" forum.

My next step forward was one day I picked up a popular Scottish newspaper called the Evening Times,in it was a feature about a guy who was starting up a lung cancer support group with a lung nurse,he was called Robert Lowe and lung nurse Penny Downer,I had to laugh at the surnames not perhaps the happiest of names for a lung cancer group,Lowe and Downer, but what caught my eye was Roberts history,dxd in 1993 with SCLC given two months to live,has his treatments and to the astonishment of his Doctors he makes a full recovery,then in 2007 he is now dxd with NSCLC,has treatments,makes a full recovery.I am not long home today from the lung cancer support group meeting,Robert was there,we enjoyed a few laughs together.I have so much to share with you about my cancer journey,I like to say,lung cancer may have rained on my parade,but it sure came with a great big silver lining,I am enjoying life to the full as I did prior to my dx.I look forward to getting to know you,sorry about the time taken for my reply to you,I really must do better LOL,bye for now.

[matmirror]

Thank you so much for your reply. Today she has another appointment with the oncologist. Hopefully she start on medications soon and her outlook improves. I am glad to hear that you are doing well and enjoying each day. I will refinitely tell my mom this. She is not that old, 69, but she refuses internet, online, smart phone. Just not for her. Thank you again and take care.

[michellep]

I'm so sorry to hear about your Mom. No doubt that depression is normal when this kind of diagnosis is made. If she doesn't want to take medication for this that's okay. Perhaps she will re consider another time.

I'm happy that you found this community here. There are so many wonderful people and a wealth of information as well. If you have not yet read our other forums I certainly encourage you to do so.

Please feel free to post anytime you wish. Ask away or vent your emotions as well.

Keep us updated and I wish the best for you and your Mom ((hugs))

[Janet B]

As a patient, I can remember very well that feeling of total gloom that overtook me when I was first diagnosed. How could one NOT be depressed when they hear this news? Give your mom some time. Spend time with her if you can, you don't have to talk, just be there for her. Find things for her to do to keep her mind busy, I went crazy crocheting, did a million suduko puzzles and sorted through all my family photos, anything to not think about the cancer. Once treatment does start, she will start to feel a bit more hopeful and more in control. Hopefully her doctor can gently describe her different options for antidepressants, and ease her mind about taking something.

Keep us posted about her appointment, how it went, what the plan is, what treatment is being planned. Come here often for yourself and, very important, take care of yourself.

Peace, Janet