missyk
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Posts posted by missyk
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Shelly...
My first thought when i read he said "Ouch, that hurt" was What do you think it feels like for you to make that jump with NO evidence??? Stupid, stupid man. I'm so glad you stood up for your sister, though i understand feeling a bit guilty for it the next moment. I've gone rounds with Mom's onc and nurses in the hospital because Mom doesn't want to feel like she's being a "pest" by asking for her tylenol (the only pain medication she takes).
So, Shelly, Good For You!!!
And prayers for the results to be great!
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Things are going pretty well, life is as normal as it gets...and yet i find myself sitting in tears. Spring break starts tomorrow for our school district and Mom is having Sabrina stay with her Sunday night and maybe longer, depending on how she feels and all...and just the thought brought tears to my eyes once again.
I'm SO happy Mom is feeling up to it at 10 months since diagnosis...yet i can't help myself from thinking of all the times that Sabrina will miss if this dang disease takes her grandma.
I worry so about Mom...what she's going through is unimaginable to me. I told my husband tonight...the feeling for ME is that someone reached in and grabbed a handful of my innards, so i can't fathom what it must feel like to be Mom.
Then, there's that pesky thought that floats around in my mind (and God how it makes me feel guilty when it floats close to the surface!) that it seems like it's taking forever. There's that part of me that says "she's going to die" and it wonders how cruel it can be on making us wait in limbo, i guess. Yet, when i feel like that i immediately burst into tears feeling like i'm wishing her dead when in all actuality i hyperventilate when i even ponder her being gone.
I have GREAT things going on in my life that we're all sharing in, we're getting ready to build a brand new house, i have a new nephew, my sister's getting her master's degree, my daughter's....well, she's goofy still...and we've NEVER been happier than we are now sharing it with mom. Yet, there's that lingering feeling for me that it's so special because she's dying.
I'm not sure how to get around this. -
Janice,
Hi...and so sorry that you've had to find us, but SOOO glad you have. I just turned 31 (lord, i'm getting old! LOL) and Mom was diagnosed in May of '05 with NSCLC. I know it's not "the same"...but some things are...like the way you're feeling right now.
Lordy, woman, I've been there. I'm lucky that Mom and I have always been close enough for me to tell her anything...so when i felt like i SHOULDN'T be happy she shut the door on that right away. She (and i'm sure your dad) want our happiness!! We're still their children, regardless.
As for Dad...is he still taking his meds for the bi-polar disorder?? Some of the other drugs (legal and illegal) could be effecting those, too.
Just do as you've been doing, love him, support him...and try not to be too tough on him...he's going thru alot, too.
You're always welcome to send me a message if you'd like.
Love and prayers...
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We're crossing stuff here in Iowa that no one ever thought COULD be crossed!
Much luck and many prayers comin your way, Cindi! -
Barb...Blaze!!!
Welcome!! My daughter LOVES those books!! We go and find them when we can...bought a whole lot of them from a local library that was clearing them out for "newer" books! I'm so glad to hear you've been good since the resection! Makes us all smile, i think, when we see someone doing well after 5+years!
Lots of good feelings coming your way...
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Merrilee...
Welcome to this wonderful place!!! (And WOW! another neighbor!)
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I'm available in Iowa/Nebraska/Missouri/Illinois/Minnesota area
Did i get all of them that border us? -
Just dropping my own Welcome Darrell in here! As you can tell already, there are many who care and are there for you! Sorry you had to find this place, but glad you did!
Many prayers coming for you,
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Welcome Gracie (and neighbor!!!)
Mom was diagnosed over 9 months ago with stage IV lung cancer with mets to the brain...she's still kickin right along.
I'm sorry to hear you had to find this place, but glad you did. You'll find many who've been there and much love, support, and many prayers.
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Welcome, Fran!
You'll find many who've walked the road you're travelling before you and great information...along with alot of hugs, prayers, and love.
Again, welcome
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Sneaks in by myself looking for a buddy
I don't qualify as an oldtimer, do i? Someone just point me in the right direction after handing me a Guinness! -
Sue..
I'm so terribly sorry for your loss. I wish I had words to better convey how I feel...but I'm at a loss for them.
(((Sue)))
Prayers for comfort for you and your family.
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Hospice can be such a wonderful help, so i agree with Ry about that completely...if you don't have it, give them a call.
Having worked in a nursing home as an aide for 6 years and spent many hours with family,I can say it's difficult for the nurses, also. I know that there were many families that i just didn't know how they'd react to the realization that a loved one may be getting to their last days. I found, finally, that it was easiest on them to just listen instead of trying to advise...maybe that's what they're trying for and just not getting it right.
Much love to you and your family and prayers for strength...
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Jodi...
Like everyone else on here i'm going to say...it's so normal to have ups and downs. I, like Kelly, do most of my crying in the car...especially when i hear certain songs. (Big surprise there!) I really didn't know if i'd make it through the time after initial diagnosis, it seemed so stinkin unfair. Time has passed and the ups and downs have become the "new normal" and still there are days when i feel like i walk around looking like
I once asked a friend if i should just put a sign up telling everyone what i'm dealing with when i'm like that so i don't have to answer so many questions. But i've learned, also, that those who need to know, those who are friends, know without me having to explain.We're here for you, up or down.
Hugssss you tight...
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Oh No!!! How Terrible!! Prayers on their way...and many of them!
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Val...
Wow...and here i thought i was the only one who got catty about that particular subject. My MIL is the sympathy-seeking kind of person, and her views on alot of things in life are the complete opposite of mine and Mom's, too. I get irritated so often thinking of Sabrina going through the years of growing up without my mom to balance the other grandmother's words and actions. And i worry.
((Val)) Just love her, and your love with carry your mom's love right to her! (And...lol...my MIL couldn't even remember it was Sabrina...called her Samantha for almost a year, then just switched to Angel
)With all my love to you and that precious baby girl!
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Runs around smooching all of ya!!!
Welcome to this nutty, happy, goofy, and sometimes sad place, Sandra. I think what makes me feel so comfortable here is that we're all unique, all have our own "history" with cancer and our lives in general...but here, we find a commonality that is so reassuring. -
Sharon...
Just wanted to drop in and tell you that, for Mom, it was the Tarceva that FINALLY got her losing enough hair that we shaved it off her. (See avatar)
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Prayers coming from Iowa! Sure hope they get that crap fixed up for him! ((Sue))
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I'm so sorry...my sincerest sympathies to all of Jen's family.
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All i can offer is our experience and that is that the SRS has taken care of both a one inch tumor (what does that translate to in metric?? i'm terrible with the conversions)and a one cm tumor that surgery was not an option for. Mom also had headaches before she had the tumor's "zapped" and always said she could almost "pinpoint" where the tumor was when they found it. Prayers coming your way! Don't let it get you down!!
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sheesh, i almost forgot...
It can never hurt to call the doctor and check things out you're not sure of, first of all. Secondly, Mom was put on Tarceva as something for maintaining her good results and to hold her steady, so yes, she was put on it BECAUSE she had good results. (Again, someone might come along who will know better than i, but that's what we were told)
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Meghan...
Welcome to this wonderful site!!! I don't recall Mom having those specific side-effects although she had the chills more often and diarrhea is an almost constant companion of Tarceva from what i understand. Someone will come along who can tell you more information.
In the mean time, add our prays for a great outcome!!
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I'm so sorry for my disappearance...just had to take some time to "reset" and gather all of my thoughts and basically take some time to realize where i (and mom) stood in this crazy place we call life...But, here i am, back again.
I wanted to give you all a quick update on Mom but first i wanted to say how much it broke my heart to see the losses i missed while i was away. My condolences to all of you and your families. It makes me so sad.
Mom was on Tarceva for a few months and seemed to respond well. The second little brain met that they "zapped" is almost gone and when they did her last CT they had told her that even the primary tumor was no longer visible. But, because of that lil bugger in her grape, they couldn't give her a date with NED.
Shortly after that she noticed a lump on the left side of her neck down by her shoulder. Her doctors told her (without a biopsy) that they could almost guarantee that it was a lymphnode that was popping back up with some cancer that needed to be kicked. They stopped the Tarceva and put her on something else...didn't much matter what it was though, after one treatment she spent a week in the hospital (and a night in ICU) with blood pressure of 60/40 and a racing heart. They are STILL trying to get her levels back up...the stubborn things don't want to go back to "normal" i guess.
So, in the mean time, she and her med. onc. decided that since it was HIM who made her sick
that they'd leave well enough alone until it was absolutely necessary to give her more chemo. The lymphnode that is enlarged is the only thing showing in her body for right now...but i do worry about "getting behind". But, she'll go in monthly for scans now that they're taking a "wait and see" attitude with it. The good news is that Mom was there when her 4th grandbaby was born, a little boy named Patrick...something she never thought she'd be here to see last May when she was diagnosed.
Right now she's in Vegas enjoying a much overdue trip for some relaxation...Sue-style!!!
You all have always been in my prayers and will continue to be. I'm hoping to get back here a little more regularly, too.
With all my love,
I'm not sure how to get around this.
Much luck and many prayers comin your way, Cindi!
I don't qualify as an oldtimer, do i? 
)
Worried about my mom.
in INTRODUCE YOURSELF!
Posted
Luann..
Glad you found the site, but sorry you had to. One of the first things pounded into my head when i came on was that statistics mean NOTHING...and i wholeheartedly agree. Mom is 10 months in since diagnosis (primary in left lung, mediastinal lymphnode involvement and met to brain) and she's going along just fine. As of her last scan she wasn't lighting up anything but a single node near her neck. Please know that your mom has as good a shot at winning as any and that there is NO zero survivorship...there's always at least one who makes it and nothing says your mom (or mine, or any on here) aren't that one!
Prayers and good thoughts coming your way...