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bunny

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Posts posted by bunny

    Today I said Goodbye to my Aunt

    in GRIEF

    Posted

    shelley, I'm so sorry. my mom lost her younger sister to kidney cancer, and her older sister and both her parents died when she was a teen. it seems like some people just get more than they deserve and it's heartbreaking. your strength in being able to speak on your aunt's behalf is amazing, and shines through your post.

    love and prayers,

    xoxo

    bunny

    surgery to remove right lung

    in NSCLC GROUP

    Posted

    all right. good. I think I can swing it without taking too much time off from work - mom lives right outside the city. my brother will pitch in too, though it's harder for him b/c he's not as settled in his job. I have to say, my job did not blink when I told them I'd be coming and going throughout this process. what a blessing. beach was HEAVEN today, we had so much fun. giggled our tushies off (I wish!), and gave mom's right lung (and the cancer with it!) a great send-off!!

    thanks again to everyone, I am 300% calmer about my ability to support my mom through this surgery.

    xoxo

    bunny/amie (you're right, don, it does mean friend :wink: )

    surgery to remove right lung

    in NSCLC GROUP

    Posted

    thank you all so much for your help. I feel equipped to look after my mom after the surgery now. let me ask you all this - she will tell me not to, but that's no indication of what she may need. so I want to to know whether I should plan on staying with her when she comes home. if so, how long? I feel like I should plan on being there at least a week. they scared the heck out of my when they told me to stay with her after the FNB, in case her lung collapsed. is that a risk after the pneumectomy?

    thanks again. I can't tell you how much the info a clear picture of what she's facing helps me.

    xoxo

    bunny

    Hi, I'm Suzanne

    in INTRODUCE YOURSELF!

    Posted

    welcome suzanne. my mom is in a different situation than your dad so I don't want to venture a guess re: the nausea but I can tell you this - my mom, too, is skeptical of certain meds for fear of addiction (with good reason, if you knew our family history :lol: ) but she just reminds herself that taking care of herself is the antithesis of self-destruction (addiction) so the meds are the right thing to do. it's also helpful to have someone 'dole' them out, so there's no sensation of craving them or jonesing for them. I hope this makes sense. he doesn't have to suffer!

    I have gotten so many answers here - medical, pysical, spiriual, emotional. it's really incredible.

    xoxo

    bunny

    Husband with Stage IV NSCLC

    in CAREGIVER RESOURCE CENTER

    Posted

    I am so glad mike is having so much success so far! we, too, changed doctors - my mom's resection was done by a doc we had very little confidence in (though that surgery was a success, we're grateful to him for that) and now that we're with a surgeon that feels like part of the family, it's a whole different experience.

    prayers and love

    xoxo

    bunny

    I found my hope.

    in HOPE

    Posted

    I've been reading all the new posts since I last signed on a couple days ago. I began to respond one by one, but realized I wanted to say the same thing to each new poster, so here goes: I found my hope.

    I knew I had god, I suspected I was 'tough enough' to handle this and see my mom through but I could not get past the terror, the sadness, the anger over the return of my mom's cancer. I was mad at EVERYONE. I signed on here around June 10th. slowly, you guys got me to start seeing something other than death in my mother's diagnosis. but still, I could not get my heart around HOPE. I was too afraid to invest, as I did last time, in the idea that she would get better.

    so here's what happened today - I went to TWO catholic christenings (I am the child of a mixed jewish/protestant marriage and I live with a catholic born and raised on the west coast of ireland). I was in church all day long with beautiful babies and their amazing parents. one of the churches was a block and a half from ground zero. it was all incredibly moving. at first, I felt sad because I am not a mother yet and my mom is not a grandmother. but then, something shifted.

    the baptismal prayers changed me today. I realized that my prayers have been too limited - "please god make mom ok" "please god, fix her cancer". I was selling us both short! so, now, here's my prayer

    "please, god, help me remember that I and my mom are your children. like any good parent, you care and look out for us whether we know it or not. and no matter what the outcome of any given situation is, god, help me remember that, in your eyes, I am an only child. my mother is an only child. there is no limit to your love and grace. that what I would ask for is far short of you can provide"

    so now, I have decided to stop limiting my prayers to what I think god can do, and let god decide what s/he/god can do. that's my hope. I'm still scared, but I feel so much better now that I remembered that my mom, and me, are in god's hands. I still have a hard time investing in a specific outcome for my mom, but I can whole-heartedly know that we are being taken care of.

    it hasn't escaped me that today is father's day. my own father has been out of the country for six months for reasons I don't completely support. so now that I've remembered who my true parent is (god, obviously) it's just not as hard to face what's going on with my earthly parents.

    I hope this made some kind of sense. you are all instruments of faith for me, right now, so thank you.

    xoxo

    bunny

    PS. bunny is a college nickname - my name is amie. I have trust issues. :wink:

    Husband with Stage IV NSCLC

    in CAREGIVER RESOURCE CENTER

    Posted

    kim and mike

    I am fairly new to this board but the welcomes I received, when I was lost in that 'mom's cancer is back' terror I was in when I found LCSC, meant the world to me. I have come to the hope I have now slowly. hey, thank god for the softball injury! my mom's LC was first discovered in a pre-op xray for another procedure. I hope mike's treatment goes well, and my thoughts and prayers are with you.

    xoxo

    bunny

    Struggling

    in GENERAL

    Posted

    sorry to respond so long after the fact. I relate to your outward reactions, and I'm just so sorry things are the way they are for you and don. I am new to this board, but I can't tell you how much calmer I've become about my mom's cancer watching you all walk with dignity and grace through whatever comes. consider me one more person you can 'dump' on any time.

    xoxo

    amie

    In shock!!!!!

    in INTRODUCE YOURSELF!

    Posted

    I thought I had welcomed you but just realized I haven't. I'm sorry you're living with this now, but I'm glad you're here. I am in the info-gathering phase right now, too but the more I hear the more I feel my mom has a real shot at beating it. there's so much scary stuff out there about LC in general, it's so good to come here where everyone is so supportive and really knows how to temper the good with the bad. your sister is so blessed to have you all. my brother and I are still kind of feeling out how we can focus on mom, and support each other a bit at the same time. we'll work it out, though.

    love, prayers and good wishes,

    xoxo

    bunny

    From Beginning to End

    in SCLC GROUP

    Posted

    your post was poetry - and I agree, knowing my powerlessness gives me the power to live my life in god's grace, as opposed to a futile struggle to gain control. thanks for the reminder. I have been struggling for two weeks with my mom's diagnosis and what's ahead for her, and your posted lifted about 400 pounds off my back. be well, and thanks.

    xoxo

    bunny

    mom staying with original surgery date

    in GENERAL

    Posted

    thank you so much. I know the positive thoughts and prayers from this board are already working for mom and me. as scary as the surgery is, this waiting is worse. I am better in action-mode. my mom seems great, though, taking it all in stride as she does. amazing.

    thanks again,

    xoxo

    bunny

    sorry, confused and new here.

    in INTRODUCE YOURSELF!

    Posted

    Lisa, you are my direct line to god today. The last few days I'd been feeling like a bull in china shop here, embarassed over what I'd shared so far. I am ashamed, in some ways, that these last two weeks have been so excrutiating for me - I thought I was tougher. On the other hand, I feel guilty sharing how hard it's been to see my mom go through all this, in light of what others on this board are going though. So thanks for assuring me it's a safe, ok place for me to do this. As I get my constition back, I hope to return the favor.

    xoxo

    amie

    God will never desert us

    in HOPE

    Posted

    I loved it, and I'm not even Christian (technically, well it's a long, confusing story). some things are universal - the god know is love, and, as a very wise friend once told me "grace is enough, if you cooperate with it."

    xoxo

    bunny

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