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New here and need alot of help


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Guest I love my Daddy
Posted

I am 22 almost 23 and I still live with my mom. Yesterday I found out that my Daddy has cancer. He never told me what kind it is but I almost postive it is lung since it is in the family. I need help dealing with it because I don't think I am doing so well with it right now. I try to go to sleep but all I am seeing when I close my eyes is my father's funaly and I start to cry. Even now as I am writing this I am trying not to. I don't see my Daddy that much anymore because I work alot and so does my mom. I know that you guys say you just take it one day at a time but it is so hard. I just want to scream or something. My dad's says for me not to worry cause he doesn't planing on dieing anytime soon but he is also the guy that wouldn't go to a doctor till his job forced him to. I love him but I can't help but wonder if he had gone sonner would he still have had it or what? I am just so scared and really need someone to talk to cause everyone keeps telling me he will be fine but what if he isn't. He has to go back to the doc to have a catscan done to see how bad it is. I have read a few of these and like some of the people on here my dad too is a smoker. My mom she quite a few months ago. My father is also a drinker as well. I just don't know what to do or how to handly this.

Posted

Brandy...

First, let me say welcome, though i'm sorry you needed to find this site.

As you can see by the time i posted this...not being able to sleep (from your other post) isn't too uncommon for those of us not going through the treatments themselves. Mom sleeps alot right now...i told her that i suppose she's just using mine up, too. I haven't slept right since she was diagnosed. I'm sure you can relate, unfortunately.

Oh, dearheart, you're SO young to be dealing with this...and i thought i was the baby of the boards! First and best advice i can give you if you can't sleep is to take the time to do a little research, if you can get your daddy or mom to clue you into exactly what kind of cancer he's dealing with. It helped me to find this board...to see that there are people that are LIVING with this disease, that are beating this disease! There is HOPE here...even when we don't feel it ourselves, others can give of theirs to help you through. I feel, alot, like i take more than i give...but i know that those on here that have walked this road before me know just what i'm going through and don't mind me taking right now.

Hopefully when the results of the scans are back your mom and daddy will let you know exactly what your family is dealing with...

My dad quit smoking about 5 years before diagnosis, mom quit almost 20 years before diagnosis, and i still smoke...as do my brother and (much less so) my sister...and you know what? They don't care on here...it's not about judging you or your daddy or mom...it's about support, love, caring, sharing, and hope!

You're a wonderful daughter! You're daddy is so lucky have you!!! You're handling it just as we all do...one step at a time.

Prayers for you, your daddy, your family...

Posted

Brandy,

What your going through is not uncommon. :( The fear will get you in the heart every time!

I would like to suggest you maybe attend your dad's doctor appointment with him when he goes. Yes, that means you will have to take a day off of work. You may wish to express to your parents that you NEED and WANT to be involved. I would think it is very hard to sit there and know NOTHING! NOT GOOD!

My kids were your age when I was dx.d 10 years ago.

Please hear me when I say, (10) (TEN) years ago. They walked the walk with me from start to finish. I never kept anything from them. This is NOT always a death sentence. And I come from a long line of lung cancer.

SLOW DOWN! You don't even know what he has yet.

Posted

Welcome! Sp sorry to hear about your dad. While cancer is a scary journey it is one that many people survive and live with. There are many survivors that join in on this board.

Don't jump to conclusions about your dad's health. Really really try to take it one day at a time - there is hope!

All the best to you and your family.

Wendy

  • 2 weeks later...
Posted

I'm so glad you found this site!! It ia a God send!! Being scared is normal- we are all scared here. The people here will pray for you, pray with you and walk thru every test, scan, chemo, radiation, surgery- everything with you!! God Bless you and your family.

Posted

Hi honey,

You came to the right place. As you see by these postings, people here really care. They care about you and your dad.

Get involved with your dads treatments. If you can go to his doctor visits, don't be afraid to ask the Doctors questions.

If you have any questions for us put it out to this board. We have so many knowledgeable people here, who have been through every kind of circumstances there may be.

One thing you must remember. LC is not a death sentence. Do not listen to stastics. Stastics can be beaten. So many here have beaten the odds.

Have faith, you will have many prayers sent to him from here.

Keep us updated. He will get through this. It will get easier after he starts treatment and the initial shock will wear off.

Maryanne

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