Darci Posted March 22, 2006 Share Posted March 22, 2006 Jacqui, you have come to the rigt place to get help, support and information. The people here are the best! My 81 year old father in law recently completed chemo, and he tolerated it reasonably well. It was no picnic, but he made it through. It is very positive that your mom is generally in good health other than her LC dx - this will help her as she goes through the treatments, because her body is strong. But, emotionally, from my experience, it is hard when you have never been ill to all of a sudden be going through chemo/radiation,etc. Keep that in mind as you help your mom. Keep asking questions - ask here, ask the doctors. Don't be afraid to get the information you so desparately need right now. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
shelliemacs Posted March 22, 2006 Share Posted March 22, 2006 Fearing the unknown is absolutely normal. I went through those exact same emotions, "How will I be able to help mom", "What can I do to ease her pain", "How can I help her to get well", "How can I handle life without her" Well all the words I could say will be useless. I can say, you will find your way through it. One minute at a time, one day at a time. Its a constantly changing journey your now on. No two days will be alike. Soon though you will become used to the words and processes and terms that are being used. Once treatment is started you can take a deep breath. Unfortunately the unknown is a constant and if the worst does happen, again you will find a way through it. With tears, smiles, laughs and memories. Keep hope, it will mean the world to your mom to see your positive. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jaxanisa Posted March 22, 2006 Author Share Posted March 22, 2006 When will I feel like I can smile again without feeling guilty? I mean the moment a smile comes to my face I remember my mother's situation and it blocks the light hearted feeling I used to have so often. I smile with my mom and tell her I love her more than I ever did and I make it a point to be with her instead of going out or running to a friends house or working from home but the sense of ease is gone.. Please know though that all of your messages and warm thoughts help me to know I am not alone. I have a support group that is or has been down this road and is a wealth of knowledge so I am so blessed to have found all of you... I just pray the fear subsides and the ability to live for today surfaces. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
michelepal Posted March 22, 2006 Share Posted March 22, 2006 Jaqui, I'm so truly sorry that you have to deal with such a difficult situation. I will keep your family in my prayers.. I know exactly how you feel about smiling or laughing because I feel the same way. It's been 4mts since my Dad passed away and I feel quilty if I smile. It's like how can you smile you Father died. Take care Michele Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
melindasue37 Posted March 22, 2006 Share Posted March 22, 2006 All of your thoughts and feelings are so new, so fresh, and it hurts to think about your Mom having lung cancer. I know how you feel. I remember feeling that it was almost like a death. You just can't get the thoughts out of your mind. They are constantly there and because of the unknown, it just makes things so much harder. Just as in the grieving process, just give yourself a little time to adjust. You'll begin to experience your new "normal." You'll begin to feel like your self again and it won't be as overwhelming as it now. There will be a time that you'll begin to smile without feeling guilty. I promise. You are doing all you should right now. Just continue to be there for your Mom. Share the stories of all the people here who have beat the odds. Keep her believing that she too can beat it. You need to take good care of yourself too and continue to come here for support. I will pray that you'll begin to more like yourself very soon. Warm Hugs, Melinda Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RandyW Posted March 22, 2006 Share Posted March 22, 2006 Once you get used to this new ROUTINE things will be a little better I think. I went throught the same thing when Deb was diagnosed. We always stayed happy and thought positive and were convinced that she would beat this disease. On !/23/2006 She beat the disease and is free from it, But not here with me. Life will get a little easier with time. Think Positive, Enjoy every day you get together, and what happens happens. Every thing will work out for you folks. I am convinced of that. Just remember what eeveryone says here.Many prayers for you and your Family. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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