New member--heartbroken

[Guest mary v]

Hi I am new here. I'm glad to read all of the support you give to one another in this community.I need some support of my own. My precious mother Rose, 72, was diagnosed with NSCLC, Stage IV, adenocarcinoma w/ metastis to liver, on April 15,2006. Non-smoker, inoperable, 6-12 months with treatment--gemzar and carboplatin. She did 5 rounds...new CAT scan (8/25/06) shows the liver is now "stable" but there is a new metastis to lymph nodes & chest cavity bone. She begins a new chemo cocktail (I don't know the meds off hand) 8/31 -- no time to waste.

Here is where I currently need advice:

*How do I support my devastated father?

*How do I bear this?

*Can someone suggest a diet for her?

*Are there any success stories that can give us

hope?

[Raindog]

Hi and welcome Mary,

So sorry about your Moms diagnoses. I can fully appreciate all that you are going through, My Father, also 72, was recently diagnosed with stage IV lung cancer.

You have found the best place for support, advise, encouragement and most important of all: SUCCESS STORIES!!

Throw the numbers out the window, they are out of date and do not apply.

I have read tons of great success stories on this board. My family and I would not be nearly as together as we are without the wonderful people in this community.

I don't have much in the way of advice other than: Stay positive, ignore statistics, lean on your faith, and read, share and vent on this message board. You will find GREAT inspiration and ears here.

For your Father I would suggest this: Let him know the HUGE strides medical science has made with cancer. Let him know that cancer is no longer the "death sentence" it once was in his generation.

I had to keep reminding my parents of that fact. When they grew up, the very mentioning of cancer was associtated with death. That is no longer the case.

Be gentle, loving and honest with him. Dads are stronger than we know.

My VERY best wishes and thoughts to you and your Family. It's a difficult road, but it can be traveled with great success.

Best,

-Rod

[MsC1210]

Hello Mary V and welcome.

I am so sorry about your mother but glad you have found this site. You are so correct about the support system here.

Although I have no answers for your questions, I can assure you that the others will be along to offer you some wonderful suggestions and advice.

Please keep us posted along the way and let us know how we can help. Check out the LC Survivors forum as well as the Good News forum and read about the survivors and their successes. There is always hope.

Sending you prayers and positive thoughts,

Chris

[RandyW]

Mary First Off I am sorry we have to meet but glad we have met here. Wonderful group here and lots of support and Knowledge.

Good News and survivor forums are great for inspiration. You have to be in a fighting spirit to battle Lung Cancer. Do not take it lightly; It is serious fight. We are in your corner with your family also including Dad. Adenocarcinoma is the most common type of NSCLC there is. This means most research and funding which is a good thing. there are so many options for treatments now and the list is growing almost Daily. I am Mod of New treatment and Clinical trials Forum. Never give up hope.

Diet tips are pretty much this standard. You have to eat to fight and Keep up strenght. eat ligh snacks when you are hungry not neccesarily at a given time like we have grown used to. Snack whenever you are hungry. Avoid Sugar. Sugar feeds cancer basically. If you have problems swallowing keep some Ensure or Boost on hand. Very nutritional and helpful if you do not think you can swallow solid foods.

Remember Doctors Have a God Complex but only God is a Doctor. He makes the decisions on how long a person lives. There are about 6 conventional types of Chemo plus maybe radiation treatments and hundreds of clinical trials available. The Cancer world is working to get Lung Cancer to the point of a chronic disease and then a curable disease. Refuse to lose and Never give up Hopew. Sending Prayers from under the CArolina Blue skies.

[EastCoastLadi]

Mary,

With mixed emotions I welcome you here, it is unfortunate that you need to be here, but so fortunate that you have found such a wonderful place.

First, I am sorry about your mom, but it's a good thing that she is starting up a new chemo.

Please read about here about the many successful stories from our "survivors", so please don't give up hope. I think you may want to talk to your dad about this site and see if he would like to check it out. He doesn't have to post, he could just read and probably will get a better understanding from people first hand as to what may or may not happen.

As for yourself, your here too, come in join in our chats, they are great for questions, concerns, chit=chatting, anything goes!!!!!

In addition to us here for support, talk to the social worker at your moms' hospital. Find out about what support systems there are not only for your mom and dad, but for you and your family as well, and if you have children there are support groups around for them too.

As for her diet, she can supplement with drinks such as "Boost" and "Ensure", you may be able to get some samples from the hosp. for her to try. But I found with my husbands' appetite after chemo, was to keep the food simple, eat small amounts, but as many times as her could.

Well I hope I have been able to give you some suggestions. Please take care....

Grace

[Don Wood]

Hi, Mary! I can definitely give you a success story. My wife, a nonsmoker, was diagnosed with Stage IV nsclc, adenocarcinoma, almost 4 years ago, and given 9 months. She has been through a number of chemos and radiation (see below) and is living a decent life. It is a new life, more limited than before, but it definitely is a life worth living. I wish you and your mom the best. Don

[hollyanne]

Mary -

I am sorry you had to find us...but you WILL get so much support here. I was in a very similar situation with my parents...I promise you that your dad will find a way to process everything. All you can do is love both your mom and dad every day. I will send you a PM as well.

Take each day as it comes. Your mom is not a statistic...every case has HOPE.

Welcome.

[Guest mary v]

I'm very encouraged by your post--your wife's story is very similiar to my mother's. I so desperately want her to live. I'll most certainly keep your wife in my prayers as I pray for my mother.

Thank you so much for the encouragement.

Mary

[Guest mary v]

Rod,

Thank you. Wow, I'm so glad I happened upon this site. I sincerely thought I was alone. I have been paralyzed with anxiety and dread for the 4 months since my mom's diag. I think I have found a place to run. Sorry to meet you this way but so glad to find you all. It's made today a good day.

With gratitude,

Mary

[trish2418]

Hi Mary and welcome to LCSC. I'm so sorry to hear about your mom's diagnosis. Like the others have said, keeping Boost and Ensure around helps to keep the pounds on. Also, drinking plenty of water is extremely important. While I was going through treatment, I found foods like pudding, mashed potatoes, grilled food, etc. to be easier to swallow and digest. You and your family are in my prayers.

Trish

[Donna G]

I just want to say welcome to you Mary. Keep us posted on how your Mom is doing.

Donna G

[marym]

Hi Mary,

I'm so sorry you needed to find our board, but welcome. First forget any timetable given. There are so many stories here that have defied the numbers. I'm already over a yer passed my initial diagnosis.

How to take care of your mother. On a practical you will need to provide help in so everyday things. Chemo makes you tired and your just cannot do as much. On an emotional side, make every moment count. Create new memories and talk abou old memories. Just having my family so close to me means so much.

Best wishes.

Mary