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Adjusting to "new normal"

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Hi everyone,

I read all the time but have not been as active in posting. I hope to be better soon. I apologize for that. Some of you know me, some of the new comers don't know me that well.

It has been over 4 years since my mom's diagnosis. Knock on wood, we have been so blessed. I have always suffered from major medical-related anxiety and I think my dad's diagnosis pushed me a bit over the edge. I used to be soooo ignorant and think lung cancer couldn't touch us since they quit smoking over 30 years ago. Ignorance is bliss I think :):)

For the past 4 years I have been living from dr appt to dr appt. I refused to plan things b/c I worried it would jinx scans, blood work, etc. I am slowing starting to learn that life will be full of tests. I worried that planning my twins first b-day will jinx my blood work in April and my dad's scans in May. My mom wisely pointed out that they will always have upcoming scans, I will always have upcoming blood work and mamograms, etc. I am trying REALLY hard to live a new "new normal" life.

Yesterday we were at a beautiful outdoor mall in Newport Beach, warm weather, palm trees. I looked around at everyone and wondered who had cancer lurking in their bodies. I know that is not normal :)But I also managed to take the time to reflect on life blessings and enjoy it.

The twins are 9 months this week. They are so much fun! Everyday I worry that they bring me so much joy, when is the other shoe dropping....

Ok, enough babbling. I just wanted to say hi to everyone, and just vent out loud in case others are suffering from "lunaticia" as my mom calls it.


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Hi Andrea,

I really appreciate your posts because I am the same way. I am always worried about myself or someone else in my family getting cancer. I recently posted about my anxiety in finding a cyst on my ovary. I instantly thought the worst because it was a "complex" cyst. I have a follow up ultrasound in early May. I am trying REALLY hard not to worry about it and I think I am doing okay, but it is always in the back of my mind. I think if my mom could get lung cancer then why couldn't this happen to me? Being a worrier is exhausting, isn't it? I always tell my family they don't have to worry about anything because I worry enough for all of us!

Take care!

Your babies are adorable!


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Thanks Jill and Katie for letting me vent!! (I will be searching for cyst results in May)

I actually think my weight problem has a bit to do with anxiety. I had lost 60lbs, gained 30back. Almost like if I am heavy, I have that wrong with me and if I were less fluffy, things would be way too good :) I am going back on track though trying to lose it agian ;)

I am soooo blessed, I can have no complaints, but I guess we are all human and i have those deomons so if nothing else, I hope my neurosis/lunaticia can make someoen else feel better about their own.

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I can't really say anything to help. But I wanted to tell you that I will be joining you in the obsessive worrier's club.

I tend to take on all the worry for everyone I know who needs worrying about, and many who don't. I worry about all the what if's too....I think I'll fit right in. :)

It's not an easy road to take though, is it??



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