Marci Posted August 22, 2008 Share Posted August 22, 2008 Hi All, Just venting here. I just came into work and really can't focus right now. I just left the house this a.m. and had a blow out with my brother in which my mother witnessed and its just not good. My brother just turned 18 and is the baby of the family. He has always had everything done for him by my mom and myself and everyone else around. But things need to change a bit now I believe. My husband and I work F/T I do my mothers appointments, I clean, shop, cook, and my husband helps with the laundry all weekend long. He never gets to have any time to himself my husband b/c he is doing our laundry, my brother's laundry, my mother's laundry etc. I believe we should be doing ours and my mothers but my brother is 18 years old and is well and abled. I know he is young and this is hard but its hard on us too. He was home all day yesterday and walked by a bag of garbage and never brought out all day never walked to the mailbox for the mail. When I got home from work I got the mail and took out the garbage that he walked by all day. He spends his evenings out with friends every night socializing away from all that is going on. My husband and I are at home after work bringing the garbage out, laundry, cleaning etc. I find this unfair that we get no help with anything and I threw a fit. I guess I just hit a breaking point right now. We have always spared my brother from everything treating him like a king but reality is that can't be done anymore. Maybe I was wrong and now my mom is mad at me b/c she said I was picking on him. Once again, sparing him from all that is going on I believe. Sorry to vent just had to. Marci Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SandraL Posted August 22, 2008 Share Posted August 22, 2008 Well Marci this is the place to vent. This is so hard on everyone and tempers to get on edge. Maybe a more quieter talk with him on what he can do to help will have better results. He is obviously upset as well and may feel better if that is acknowledged and some agreement can be reached on how he can support in this situation as well. Good luck with that Sandra Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Larry's Wife Posted August 22, 2008 Share Posted August 22, 2008 Marci, I don't think you are wrong. Your brother is old enough to help. My son is 14. Although I didn't want him to take care of Larry's more personal needs, he did tons of stuff to help out. He did his own laundry, took care of the dogs, took care of certain household chores, etc. He even cooked dinner occasionally. And he still had enough time for some fun and relaxation!! Even though Larry has passed away, he still does his chores. Your mom is doing your brother no favors by robbing him from the opportunity of being a responsible member of the household. What in the world is he going to do when he is forced to "man up" and take care of himself some day? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RandyW Posted August 22, 2008 Share Posted August 22, 2008 Marci I had an 18 year old staying with me and hes the same way!! Fixing it with 6 months of National guard Boot Camp and we willsee what happens when he gets Back!! wsa real good at xbox and Playstations and usually did dishes as I was walkin in the door. Ya can see my car pulling in from the couch in the living room (His Favorite PLAce) When he got his laptop he was surfing the net chatting with girlfriend and watchin my tv with remote in other hand!! Keep after him and good luck Yes He needs togrow up fast or reality is gonna be tough on him sooner rather than later!!!! VENT AWAYthats what we are here for!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Marci Posted August 22, 2008 Author Share Posted August 22, 2008 Thanks Everyone for listening. I am trying to be more patient and understanding. I guess I just lost it today. Thanks for listening- Marci Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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