jaminkw Posted March 3, 2009 Share Posted March 3, 2009 Afternoon everyone. After about three really dead days on the internet for me (I think one day my email box was empty--never happens) I came home from a shopping trip and lunch with a friend to a full box. Problem is, I don't feel like responding to any of them. Have been in a funk lately. Hope it's related to tonight and I'll work my way through it. I usually go to my cancer group on Tuesday but can't tonight. I am attending a hospice candlelight event at the Botanical Gardens. It's to remember all the people who died of cancer last year. I'll be lighting a candle for my friend Jim. I spent some time a week or so ago with his family. It was as such get togethers should be--we told stories and laughed and cried together. What makes this event tonight so difficult is the expectation that a person in Jim's life will probably be there. He was not Jim's SO although he likes to tell people he was. He lived in a separate house on the property where Jim lived. I really dislike him and feel he took advantage of Jim and drained him dry physically, financially and emotionally. Jim was such a good person. He could never say no. Thanks for giving me a forum to get this off my chest before I go. In Jim's memory, I don't want to get into anything with this man. Jim hated confrontation and conflict. Judy in Key West Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SandraL Posted March 3, 2009 Share Posted March 3, 2009 Hi Judy. Sorry to hear about your funk and your anxiety about tonight. But you will do fine of course and avoid any confrontation. Your friend Jim sounded like such a good person. Best wishes tonight. I am at home today (when am I not at home lately) but going out this afternoon (with help) to get some groceries for our upcoming weekend away. We are going up island to the ski hill and will be staying in a beautiful chalet on the mountain. So a change in scenery will be good for me. I hope everyone is having an awesome Tuesday. Sandra Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
LovesLife Posted March 3, 2009 Share Posted March 3, 2009 Judy - I am really sorry to hear you are in a funk. Jim will know you are there tonight (and will likely know you are biting your tongue) and will love you all the more for it. Perhaps this "in-SO" will not even be there and you will be free to center on your own grief. Jim sounds like such a wonderful man/friend and it is no wonder you miss him so much. Sandra - it is great that you have such a nice weekend away planned. I know you have been cooped up (aside from appts) and I'm glad you will get to enjoy some beautiful scenery and time spent with family in different surroundings. If you get a chance, PM when you get back and tell me all about it! Big hugs to both of you, Linda Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Janet B Posted March 3, 2009 Share Posted March 3, 2009 Hey Judy - we all need to be in a funk once in a while! I am sure that you will do fine tonight - you are going for the right reasons. I hope it is a time of good, peaceful reflection of your friendship. Sandra - I am so glad that you are feeling well enough for a weekend getaway!! I hope you have a wonderful time - pictures - we'll want pictures!!! I am dealing with oozy yucky Tarceva scalp this week so I am laying kinda low so as to not gross out the general public!! Hopefully the dermatologist will be able to help me out tomorrow! We got 14 inches of snow Sunday night so Sean (my golden retriever) and I have been out romping in it which has been fun - but I am feeling really bad for my daffodils which were peeking out of the ground on Saturday! Happy Tuesday everyone - Janet Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
beatlemike Posted March 3, 2009 Share Posted March 3, 2009 Kind of a busy day here with friends dropping over. I enjoyed it tho. Seems like sometimes you go forever without company or phone call and the next day is just the opposite.Janet I hope you get past your tarceva scalp and the itch. Sandra I hope you have a wonderful weekend and Judy I hope you have a nice evening and can get out of the funk. You know the old saying ( When life hands you a funk,make some funky music). Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ts Posted March 4, 2009 Share Posted March 4, 2009 I had some chemo scalp - red bumps that really hurt. Not too too bad. But I tried Bumble and Bumble Hair Tonic - sprayed on. It contains tea tree oil and other herbal elixers. It gave me almost immediate relief. I'm not sure I would use it on open sores. I think it is only available at hair places. On a different note - I decided to apply for a Disability Insurance claim due to the fatigue and mental functioning issues. Got a call today that my eligibility period began 3 weeks after my ER visit and they will probably rule this to be a pre-existing condition! I wasn't sure I would qualify, but this is a huge disappointment. I mean, the pre-existing condition started when? It was found after I started this job, but I am betting I am S.O.L. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Janet B Posted March 4, 2009 Share Posted March 4, 2009 ts - thanks for the product info - i will check it out - but right now i have gone beyond the usual sores and scabs to open green-oozy wounds so i am thinking I need an antibiotic. As for disability - you can apply for social security disability - the only problem is that they make you wait 6 months after you stop working to get your first check. I remember yelling at the lady - "I'm not supposed to be alive in 6 months!" That was a year ago!!! I plan on collecting for many many more years!! Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jaminkw Posted March 4, 2009 Author Share Posted March 4, 2009 Morning all. I'm coming back in this morning to thank all my friends who came in with encouraging words for last night. Thanks Sandra and Linda and Janet--you were right. I was fine, more than fine really. The offensive person was not there and it was a very inspirational ceremony. People got up and read passage and poems or just talked about their loved ones. A classical musician played the flute and we had a singing minister. While he sang, two people lit candles, one for each of the people hospice assisted in dying last year. It was held in the botanical garden (a little chilly last night) and there was a reception with a lovely buffet afterwards. It was a wonderful way to remember Jim. When life hands you a funk,make some funky music Mike, I love it. Don't think I've heard this one before. And I'm having one of those "company" weeks. There was a time I'd be frazzled with so many plans because I always had work to do--or thought I did. Like you said, now I just enjoy it. Sandra, your weekend sounds like just what you need. I don't think you'll be doing much skiing but I bet you make a bunch of friends sitting around the fire in the chalet common room--they all have them, don't they? Enjoy. Janet, you're describing my worst nightmare in ever having to be on Tarceva. Don't think I'd be able to go out in public either. ts, I remember trying to get financial help when I was first diagnosed. So much paperwork and so much BS to think you might get nothing. I'm crossing my fingers for you. Have a great day everyone. It was great just hearing what everyone is up to! Judy in Key West Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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