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I just feel I need to make this post. This is something I learned along time ago and am trying to practice everyday.

When we get up each day, we have the opportunity to make a choice. Sometimes we don't make the choice with our conscience mind, but we do make a choice.

Each day, when I wake, I lay in bed and think to myself, I have a choice to make today. Is this going to be a "good" day or a "bad" day? I make a choice to make this day a good day. I accept that not everyday will be easy and it doesn't make the sun come out when it is cloudy, but I know in my soul, that I have made a choice to make this a good day. I have the power to choose how my day will be.

I don't know if this is any help to anyone else, but think about it. We choose how we will react to anything that happens in our lives. I choose to try to be as happy as I can be. Yes I still cry and am sad, but I accept that that is part of life. It doesn't mean that my day is bad, but I try not to get angry over trivial things.

I control what I can and the rest I have to let go. That includes the anger I might have over how things happened to Randy and our family. Anger gets me no where. It steals the joy from my heart and soul and takes away my health and any good I might do.

So today I choose to have as good a day as I can make it.

Thanks for listening and understanding. If this has helped you in any way, please share it with others. That is how we learn to live, by learning from one another.

I choose to open my eyes to see the miracles that happen everyday for what they are. Miracles.

May you have a peaceful Christmas.

I wish you enough....

Much love,


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Shirley...this meant so much to me when you told me on the phone! I'm so glad you posted this to share with others. Also, I'm going to print this out and use it as a daily motivational tool just to get me off on the right foot! As you well know, I have been having a problem with anger and it has been ruining my life!!! I have to stop questioning and blaming for losing Dennis and work on accepting!!! I know having both you and God, I can do this!!!!! Thanks for being here.....for all of us!

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Dear Shirley,

So many people say to me how come you seem so happy when your husband is so sick. Why! Because I choose to be happy.

Being sad or grumpy does not make him happy. I want every day that he has to be as happy as possible.

I need my family and friends very much, not just right now, but always. If I am miserable and moaning and groaning, after awhile they will move away from me. That is just human nature.

I am aching in my heart and soul about Earl. I love him with all my heart. But I will NOT let this make me unhappy. I have him today, to hold, to talk to and to laugh with. How could I not be happy.

May all of my friends here have a Happy Holiday and a Healthy New Year.

God Bless Everyone.


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Well said by everyone. The other day I was standing in front of Hugh's closet wondering if I would ever remove his clothes and my son walked in. I was teary and told him it just wasn't fair. Without hesitation he told me not to play "that game" with myself because it would make me angry and anger wasn't going to get me anywhere. He was right, you are all right. This is what we make of it. When Hugh was alive I was determined to be happy because I, like Ginny did not want to waste any precious time being grumpy, angry or sad. We didn't have enough time together, but we had 10 months of extraodinary time together. Time with an appreciation for each other and the world around us that that I truly believe people don't and can't have unless they are facing an illness that is or could be terminal. That is what a friend of mine, who was afflicted with cancer called "the gift of cancer" and our doctors and treatment gave us was time to enjoy that new-found appreciation for ten months. I try to remember everyday to be grateful for that. It doesn't always work but at least I am trying.

I will try to be grateful this Christmas for the 28 Christmases that Hugh and I had together and to be grateful for the wonderful children we created and our grandchildren.

I hope everyone has a peaceful holiday.

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