JanWilson Posted May 9, 2017 Share Posted May 9, 2017 My almost 80 year old mother is recently diagnosed and living in Modesto. I am across the country in NJ and I am the only child. She lives with my stepfather, who is almost 90 and a friend has been in her home helping to care for her in the week since she's gotten out of the hospital, diagnosed with 3B/IV NSCLC adenocarcinoma with no brain or bone mets, but in both lungs and lymph node involvement. My mother was wonderful and upbeat while in the hospital (almost 10 days, went in for what she thought was pneumonia and was discovered to be cancer). She was eventually weaned off of high flow oxygen and certainly sounded well enough to go home. She has no other illness and has never been on any meds before (still works fulltime). She is not a frail person and quit smoking when she was pregnant with me (and I am almost 52). Since returning home to the care of her friend and husband, she was okay the first few days, and then seemed to decline markedly. More confusion, wondering who I was or repeating what she had just said. I was on the phone with the oncologist when she was in the office and she definitely appeared to understand everything that he said (Friday) but after that she seems to be rushing me off of the phone, and more confused. Sunday, they finally took her to ER because of marked confusion and ER just said she was dehydrated, gave her a few IVs and sent her home. I have subsequently asked her nurse navigator to check her records from the ER visit and there were no other issues. This morning they called the visiting nurse who told them to call the ambulance. My mother had disconnected her oxygen, wasn't letting anyone in the room, wouldn't take meds, eat or drink. Totally delirious and paranoid apparently. She is there now. I am arriving in CA tomorrow and planning to stay a few days to try to get this all straightened out. So my question is this: have any of you experienced this situation where someone seems fine in the hospital and then gets out with a tons of meds, oxygen, and all the rest and just declines? I wonder about the friend because neither my stepfather nor me know her (she's someone who knows my mother through business and trusts) because this is all so unexpected. When I engaged the nurse navigation at the hospital I found out that the friend had told everyone there she was the daughter (not my name, just that they were related) so I did clarify that. The friend will leave when my husband and I arrive and we will arrange for caregivers. Is this something that I could/should expect with cancer care, rapidly cycling from up to down? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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