Angie

Oh, Don, that is such wonderful news. I am so happy for your family.

Bill, Before my dad was diagnosed with LC, he had a hard time breathing and eventually could hardly talk. He was taken to the hospital and 9 lbs. of fluid was drained from his lungs!!!! It was malignant pleural effusion. He worried about it coming back, but it never really did. He did have some scaring of the lungs from Gemzar that caused a little shortness of breath, but nothing major. I'm so sorry you're dealing with this awful disease. God bless you and your family. Angie

Wonderful news!!! So glad to hear it! Just what you needed to lift your spirits!

From one Angie to another...I am so sorry for what you are going thru. It is SO DIFFICULT to see a loved one suffer. You should feel so good about all the love and support you are giving your dad. I'm so glad you posted. I have been thinking of you. It's so difficult during this time of the year thinking of future holidays. Enjoy this year together. I'll be keeping you and your family in my prayers. Angie

Don, I am so sorry to hear your latest news BUT there are so many on this site who have beaten brain mets...especially if there's only one. I will certainly be keeping your family in my prayers. Angie

Oh, Don, you have so much to be thankful for! I'm so glad Lucie is doing so well. I'll be looking for your next post of "Good News". Have a wonderful Thanksgiving! Angie

I can totally relate to you!!! I was extremely close to my dad, but when he passed away, (which was 10/15/04), I was okay. I did a lot of grieveing in the early stages as you did. I remember not sleeping for days!!! I needed anxiety meds to help for awhile. I miss my dad a lot, but I feel "protected" some how from the pain. Since my dad was diagnosed May 03, we've had time together to say the things we needed to say and had dinner every Sunday and talked every day. I have two sisters and we are an EXTREMELY close family. I too played a major part in my dad's last weeks at home. With hospice we were able to care for him at my parents' house. He was not able to walk, talk much, needed Depends and we fed him. He didn't know who we were most of the time since the cancer spread to the brain. And seeing him like that was awful, so I really think I was able to accept his death better. He wasn't living any kind of quality of life. I have no regrets...I was there during appointments, chemo and until the end. I said everthing I wanted to say. The cancer had spread to the liver, bones and brain. He should have been in so much pain, but with the spreading to the brain, the center for pain was affected (thank goodness!), so he didn't suffer. I am so thankful for that. I too am waiting for the big cry, but I was blessed with a wonderful dad and am thankful for all the time we did have together. Please PM me if you'd like. Thank you for your post. I can't tell you enough how much I feel what you are feeling!!

I am so sorry for your loss. My dad passed away three weeks ago, so I know how you feel. I'm glad your mom was with him when he passed as my mom was. Please take care of yourself and I will be keeping you in my prayers.

Don, I'm so glad to hear the good news. Lucie is certainly an inspiration to so many on this site! God bless! Angie

Pam, I'm am so sorry for your saddness. My dad passed away two weeks ago so I understand. I remember reading your post last year knowing that my time was coming. I hear it gets easier with time, and I too feel cheated with my kids (ages 6 and 12) that they will not get to spend the time they deserve with their grandpa. My sister is pregnant with her second child due in March. I know this will be a bitter sweet time for her. I will keep you in my prayers.

Angie - I'm glad you're doing well. God gives us strength when we need it most. I have discoved this as my dad's illness progressed and his recent death. I'm sorry your dad had a rough night. I will be keeping your family in my prayers. What a beautiful picture of your family!

I will be saying a prayer for your dad and your family. How wonderful that you are able to take care of your dad. I can understand how heartbreaking it is for you to see your dad in pain. I'm glad he has tests scheduled next week. Hopefully "they" can get the pain under control. Like Curtis said, take care of yourself too!

This morning at 8:35 my Dad passed away. My Mom was fortunate enough to be there during his last breath. My sister was stopping by to visit and help my Mom and arrived within a minute (or less) of his passing. I'm also so thankful she was there for my Mom. Today has just been a whirlwind, as you can imagine. We have so many wonderful friends and family stopping by with food and offering us comfort. My Dad hasn't been himself for a good six weeks, since the cancer has spread to the brain. He didn't know us often, but I knew he felt our love. I'm so thankful that we were able to take care of him at home. He didn't have any pain because of where the cancer was at in the brain - a true blessing! This site has been such a wonderful source of information and support these past 17 months. THANK YOU!! There is so much more I want to say but I'm exhausted, so I'm sure I'll be posting more later....probably in the "Grieving" section!!!!

How wonderful!! I'm very happy Lucie has exceeded the doctor's "expectations". Everyone loves that news! Celebrate life is right!!! P.S. Thank you, Don, for the support you have given so many of us.

Cancer is such an awful disease and like all of you, I have experienced cancer with a loved one....my dad. Approximately a year and a half ago my world changed forever.....my dad was diagnosed with lung cancer. I was devistated and couldn't sleep for days. I then regained my strength and knew I needed to enjoy every moment with my dad while he was feeling well. I was able to do that. I wrote my dad a three page letter telling him about what a wonderful childhood I had and appreciated all the great times we had together. When I was growing up, my dad would take my sisters and I out to lunch every Saturday...something to look forward to. My dad was the one I would go to when I needed someone on MY side. He was awesome. Since I've moved back to Iowa 10 years ago, my family (parents, sisters and families) have enjoyed Sunday dinner together almost every Sunday....we call it "pizza night". I will always treasure those memories. So when my dad's cancer spread to the brain and he became like an Alzheimer's patient it was devistating. My mom, sisters and I have been helping with feeding, "changing" and caring for him. Also, Hospice has been wonderful. I feel so fortunate that I live close enough where I can help. During this awful time I have felt completely loved, taken care of and at peace. My dad is 67 years old. Certainly too young to die in my eyes, but he has seen me grow up, graduate from college, get married and see my wonderful children. I feel completely bleessed with all those around me...my wonderul husband of 15 years and my two loving daughters, two great sisters, and a great mom. I am also surrounded by wonderful friends, neighbors and coworkers. Everyone has made this difficult time so much easier on me....and this SUPPORTIVE SITE. I have found so much support and comfort here. THANK YOU!! My dad MAYBE has three months at the most and it's difficult that he doesn't even know me anymore, but I truly feel I have been blessed. God has given me the strength when I need it the most and I am truly thankful. I have no regrets with my dad. I was there through the doctor and chemo appointments and shared many stories from here. My dad knows how very much I love him and I am at peace. I just felt like sharing thoughts from my heart tonight. Thank you for taking the time to read this, and God bless you all!

I am so sorry about your recent diagnosis of brain mets. SO MANY on this site have had success with radiation, so I pray this will be the case with you. I'll be saying a prayer for you.

In mid-July my Dad was starting to get confused, but we didn't think much of it since he had received so much chemo - "chemo head", we called him. He also was sick to his stomach and lost quite a bit of weight...again we thought chemo was to blame. By the end of August, his memory was awful. We then scheduled an MRI and found out that he had 12 leasions on his brain. Well, only a few weeks have gone by and my Dad is like an Alzheimer's patient. I can't believe how fast things have progressed!! He can no longer feed himself. He doesn't know who we are (my Mom, and sisters and I). He needs "Depends" and doesn't have any sort of short term or long term memory. So my Dad, as I knew him, is gone. Hospice has been wonderful and we are doing our best to keep Dad at home. Cancer is such an awful disease. ANY symptoms, no matter how small or insignificant, should be checked out early on....such as blurred vision, nausea, vomitting, memory loss or headaches. I wish we would have tested earlier. We didn't get to complete radiation, but what he received didn't help.

Natalie, It's completely normal to feel the way you do, and to be "jealous" of your friend and her mother. I'm sure I would feel exactly the same way. The wedding will be very emotional for you with it falling on your mom's birthday. But like you said, maybe it will help to keep your mind preoccupied a bit. My best friend died on the 4th of July 11 years ago and I have only been to the cemetary a couple of times. I have a VERY DIFFICULT time with that...seeing her name on that marker is just awful. She was only 23 when she died. I think I will feel the same way when my dad dies. We expect that will be any day now. Some people get a lot of comfort from visiting their loved one's grave and others do not. Please don't feel guilty that you are not going on Saturday. I will be thinking of you on Saturday. Angie

Thank you all so much for your support. I posted last week about "Going Down Hill Fast" and the words of support and understanding were overwhelming and meant so much to me. Today my Mom and I took a look at a nursing home We are going to try our best to keep Dad at home, but it's becoming increasingly difficult, so we wanted to have a plan to get in fast if we needed to so we are completing an application. My Dad can no longer walk. His brain isn't sending messages to his legs anymore and with him being 200 lbs, one person is not enough to handle him. He can't tell us when he has to go to the bathroom and can no longer feed himself very well. He just looks at the food not quite knowing what to do. I am taking mornings off from work this week so I can help my Mom get Dad out of bed, etc., and my sister will do the same next week...and we'll go from there. A home health nurse will come in daily for about an hour for a "sponge bath", which he desperately needs after a night sitting in wet Depends. It's VERY difficult to change him. I have two sisters who visit in the evening and our husbands help with getting him in bed at night. We got a wheel chair on Sunday which helps. Each day seems to be worse. God has given me strength to deal with this awful situation. I am thanful for that. The doctors say possibly three or four months he may have left. I can't image him living that long. To me, things seem to be progressing very quickly. This is certainly no life for my Dad.

I feel like everything is totally out of control! As I had posted last week, my Dad's cancer had spread to the brain. He has 12 spots and is receiving radiation. His personality has COMPLETELY changed. He is now like an Alzheimer's patient. He needs to wear Depends and it's difficult to "make him" take his medication. He knows us, but not much more. If he doesn't get Halodril (something like that), it's just awful. We try to take him the the bathroom, help him with his pants and tell him to sit down. He says, "No", just like a little kid and started hitting my Mom and me! My Dad is a 200 lb man and we can't MAKE him sit, so he urinates over everything. This morning he pulled his Depends off and urinated all over the bed and wouldn't get up until the social worker came over. We've started the "Transistion Hospice", but can't start officially with Hospice until radiation is completed. He was to have eight more treatments, but so far, six hasn't made a bit of difference. We're meeting with doctors tomorrow to hopefully start Hospice sooner. Things have just gotten worse since he came home from the hospital. I've already lost my Dad that I know. My sisters and I help my Mom as much as we can. My work has been WONDERFUL and so have neighbors and friends. The meds he is taking (when he takes them) helps tremendously. It's the same kind as prescribed to schitzophrenia patients. My Dad's doctor has been wonderful. He called us tonight at 8:30 p.m. from his house to see how things were going. He even offered to come over to give my Dad a shot form of his meds if he wouldn't take the oral pill. Thankfully, we tried a litle sooner this time before the other dose completely wore off so he was more reasonable. I'm actually doing better than I thought I would. At least he is not in any pain at all which is amazing since cancer is in his lungs, liver and bones! I very thankful for no pain! I just can't belive how fast everything is happening! It started about six weeks ago with a little confusion and got a little worse each day, but VERY subtle changes. Thank you all for taking time to read this. God Bless you!

Thank you all so much for your posts of kind words of support and encouragement. They mean so much to me. My Dad will come home from the hospital tomorrow. He will require 24 hour care, which my Mom can provide at this point, with help from me and my two sisters. We are fortunate to live close. My Dad has really changed with radiation and high dose meds. However, his appetite has increased tremendously. He eats about everything the hospital has to offer. On the downside, he has become very mean and sees dogs flying in the air. He doesn't know what month it is etc. It's very much like dealing with an Alzheimer's patient. When my Mom got there today he asked where to heck she'd been. He also said he'd been waiting three hours for his pictures to develop among many other crazy things. We'll see how the rest of the radiation goes (12 more or so to go). My parents' neighbors said that one of her friends who had radiation threated her spouce with a knife!!!! So we're all a little scared, not knowing exactly what my Dad will be like. I do know that he will be glad to be home. The nurses are NOT compassionate in the hospital. He is so used to the wonderful staff at the cancer office. Thanks for listening and God bless you all!

Oh, Shellie, I am so sorry. I think of you often and all the pain you've been through....it's just not fair. I will be saying a prayer for you and your sister.

My dad had an MRI yesterday and we found out the results today. Unfortunately, he has several "spots" on his brain, both sides. We were not surprised because of my dad being forgetful and confused. And today, for the first time, he started seeing double. It didn't last long, but still another new symptom! He is now in the hospital and will be in for a week, maybe longer. He has been very nauseated lately, so they are going to try to control that. He also starts radiation tomorrow after we meet with the doctor to discusss a "plan of action". Last week my dad wanted to die and now he's ready to fight again. I think that's great! Can anyone share a story about their own experience or experience of a loved one with radiation for brain mets? Thank you so much!

I posted yesterday regarding memory loss and chemo and appreicate the responses - thank you! I called my dad's doctor and told the nurse about my dad being confused, nauseated, etc., which she said can all be from the chemo, BUT could also mean that the cancer has spread to the brain. She talked to my dad's doctor who said that he would like my dad in for a MRI ASAP. I knew my dad would be upset with me for going behind his back. He feels like he is treated like a baby sometimes. The nurse called him today and said I called with a few chemo questions regarding memory loss, etc and she said that the doctor would like to schedule an MRI... TODAY! My dad said absolutely not - for today anyway. I know he was caught off guard and when I visited him today, he said, "Well, there she is, the stool pigeon!" He was very cold to me and we didn't talk about it much. My mom gave me the look of "don't bring it up." She later said that my dad was very upset and that she'd call me later. My sister said that my dad said he wants to die. He was given 16 months and here were are....16 months. My sister emphasized that it's just an average, but he said, "Just look at me! How much longer do you think I'm going to last?" My mom BEGGED the doctor to give them a prognosis when he was diagnosed, so the doctor reluctantly told him. I have been in tears since I"ve been home....with a stiff drink in hand! I"m so depressed. My dad just isn't my dad anymore and, God, I miss him...My 12 year old daughter and husband have been wonderful, but just don't understand like all of you on this board! Thank you for taking the time to read this. I just needed to "vent". I am so thankful for this wonderful site! God Bless you all!

My dad was diagnosed almost 16 months ago with lung cancer. He did very well in the beginning, responding to chemo and never once sick.....until about six weeks ago. Since then, he has lost A LOT of weight, doesn't eat much, has severe neuro??? (numbness in fingers and toes). He finished his chemo a few weeks ago and according to scans, his cancer has been stable since February. He has had so much chemo that he is done for now. He has been given a prescription for Iressa, but hasn't started the drug yet because he feels he isn't well enough to tolerate it, which is true. Anyway, my question is that in the past few weeks my dad's memory is terrible. It's very hard to carry on a conversation, he repeats himself and seems generally very confused. My dad's doctor said that he has given my dad more chemo than he has given anyone else - ever! He handled it so well in the beginning, but now it's all catching up with him. I know chemo can cause memory loss, etc., but his case seems so severe. I'm afraid that the cancer may have spread to the brain, but I'm truly hoping that it's just the massive amount of chemo he's had. What do you guys think? Anyone experience this themselves or with a loved one? Thank you!