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For David P - West Virginia Love Song

Remembering Dave

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Hi, this is Karen, David C's wife. I see where David P requested WV jokes, not having heard any. I'm from WV . . . and this is one I thought was clean and cute! Enjoy everyone, especially David P!


Collards is green, my dog’s name is Blue

And I’m so lucky

To have a sweet thang like you

You hair is like cornsilk

a-flapping in the breeze.

Softer than Blue’s

And without all them fleas

You move like the bass,

Which excite me in May

You ain’t got no scales

But I luv you anyway

Yo’re as satisfy’n as okry

Just-a-fry’n in the pan,

Yo’re as fragrant as “snuff”

Right out of the can

You have some’a yore teeth,

For which I am proud

I hold my head high

When we’re in a crowd

On special occasions,

When you shave under yore arms

Well, I’m in hawg heaven

And awed by yore charms

Still them fellers at work,

They all want to know,

What I did to deserve

Such a purty young doe

Like a good roll of duct tape

Yo’re there fer yore man

To patch up life’s troubles

And fix what you can

Yo’re as cute as a junebug

a-buzz’n overhead

You ain’t mean like those far ants

I found in my bed

Cut from the best cloth

Like a plaid flannel shirt,

You speak up my life

More’n a fresh load of dirt

When you hold me real tight

Like a padded gunrack,

My life is complete;

Ain’t nuthin I lack

Yore complexion, it’s perfection,

Like the best vinyl sid’n

Despite all the years,

Yore age just keeps hidin’

Me ‘n you’s like a Moon Pie

With a RC cold drank,

We go together

Like a skunk goes with stank

Some men, they luv chocolate

For Valentine’s Day;

They git it at Wal-Mart,

It’s romantic that way

Some men git roses

On that special day

From the cooler at Kroger

“That’s impressive,” I say

Some men luv fine diamonds

From a flea market booth

“Diamonds are forever”

they explain, suave and couth

But for this man, honey,

These won’t do

Cause yore too special,

You sweet thang you

I got you a gift,

Without taste nor odor,

More useful than diamonds . . . .


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Karen, I haven't been able to get this far down the message board for the past couple days. What an awesome piece of literary work!! If one of those WV hillbillies came up with that song, there's no way people should be making jokes about them - that takes alot of thought and effort. I especially like the, "You have some'a yore teeth" verse. Thanks for the laugh Karen.


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Wow sounds like my Ashland Ky, Hunnington WV, ole stomping grounds song. I was born there and all my cousins and such are still there, however my portion of the family moved to Big-D years ago...

Very Funny song....


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